Collection of Lame Jokes

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The discussion revolves around sharing and enjoying "lame" jokes, with participants contributing various puns and one-liners. Jokes include classic setups like "A duck walks into a pharmacy..." and "Why did the chicken cross the road?" along with playful wordplay, such as "What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick." The humor is characterized by its groan-inducing quality, with many jokes eliciting laughter despite their simplicity. Participants also engage in light banter about the nature of humor, with some jokes being deemed too funny to qualify as "lame." The thread highlights a shared enjoyment of corny humor and the camaraderie that comes from exchanging jokes, creating a lighthearted atmosphere.
  • #19,101
16 Commandments for your senior years.
😂
😂
😂
😂
😂

1 - Talk to yourself, because there are times you need expert advice.
2 - Consider "In Style" to be the clothes that still fit.
3 - You don't need anger management. You need people to stop pi$$ing you off.
4 - Your people skills are just fine. It's your tolerance for idiots that needs work.
5 - The biggest lie you tell yourself is, "I don't need to write that down. I'll remember it."
6 - You have days when your life is just a tent away from a circus.
7 - These days, "on time" is when you get there.
8 - Even duct tape can't fix stupid - but it sure does muffle the sound.
9 - Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes, then come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller?
10 - Lately, You've noticed people your age are so much older than you.
11 - "Getting lucky" means walking into a room and remembering why you're there.
12 - When you were a child, you thought nap time was punishment. Now it feels like a mini vacation.
13 - Some days you have no idea what you're doing out of bed.
14 - You thought growing old would take longer.
15 - Ageing sure has slowed you down, but it hasn't shut you up.
16 - You still haven't learned to act your age, and hope you never will.
 
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  • #19,102
quddusaliquddus said:
Lamest joke you know ... 💤
Did you hear about the optometrist who fell into a lens grinder?
made a spectacle of himself...

Boss, can't come in today, voices in my head told me where my previous boss is.....

Well, you wanted bad jokes....
 
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  • #19,103
Screenshot 2024-05-21 at 10.19.56 AM.png
 
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  • #19,104
Screenshot 2024-05-21 at 10.01.12 AM.png
 
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  • #19,105
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  • #19,106
What do you call the stuff that's swept up in a citrus factory?

Fruit of the broom.
 
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  • #19,108
Borg said:
What do you call the stuff that's swept up in a citrus factory?

Fruit of the broom.
'Floor Play' I dunno....lol
 
  • #19,109
Gifovaco said:
'Floor Play' I dunno....lol
Sweet and Sour... Ya know it's .....♫a long, long road♫
 
  • #19,110
nsaspook said:
"Hello Darkness my Old Friend, I stood up too fast Again."
Too young to relate :rolleyes:
 
  • #19,112
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  • #19,114
Screenshot 2024-05-22 at 8.50.10 AM.png
 
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  • #19,115
Screenshot 2024-05-22 at 1.08.27 PM.png
 
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  • #19,116
1716439407391.png
 
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  • #19,117
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  • #19,118
1716472170604.png
 
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  • #19,119
Took me a few seconds to get it. Nice.
 
  • #19,120
phinds said:
Took me a few seconds to get it. Nice.
There are 10 types of people in the world. The first is those who understand binary numbers.
 
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  • #19,121
Yo, don't y'all know it's racist to confuse duocorns, unibecs, and unidents with unicorns?
 
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  • #19,123
Government tried to repeal Ohm's law but encountered high resistance
 
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  • #19,124
1716566895167.png
 
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  • #19,125
1716567103797.png
 
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  • #19,126
Screenshot 2024-05-24 at 11.19.59 AM.png
 
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  • #19,127
1716596905142.png
 
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  • #19,128
1716613201693.png
 
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  • #19,129
Vaping is weird ... when you cross paths with a group of bums and they smell like strawberry muffins.
 
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  • #19,130
jack action said:
Vaping is weird ... when you cross paths with a group of bums and they smell like strawberry muffins.
And that's how it all started ...

ohc=HZ4R3u9FZNQQ7kNvgE-pJRB&_nc_ht=scontent-fra3-1.jpg
 
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  • #19,131
@I was going to post exactly the same meme. :))
 
  • #19,132
dextercioby said:
@I was going to post exactly the same meme. :))
Not that I would be very surprised! I guess we have similar FB feeds.
 
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  • #19,134
ohc=ACQxJ46bEPIQ7kNvgGUNAqS&_nc_ht=scontent-fra3-1.jpg
 
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  • #19,135
jtbell said:
Then I hooked up with my wife-to-be, who lived two doors away in apartment 2D.
So she lived in a flat?
 
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  • #19,136
kuruman said:
So she lived in a flat?
I thought the number would make it plane.
 
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  • #19,137
I never knew who lived in the corresponding apartment in building 3...

Now that I think of it, the next building after that must have been an interesting place!
 
  • #19,139
On a forum about investing, I see lots of posts about making "withdrawls" from accounts. Is this a Texas thing, podnuh?
 
  • #19,140
1000025091.jpg


1000025089.jpg


1000025090.jpg
 
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  • #19,141
ohc=QWZ23dK5clAQ7kNvgHSEGBk&_nc_ht=scontent-fra3-1.jpg
 
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  • #19,142
I don't think that needs a translation ...

ohc=DbLm_xB3TpUQ7kNvgG7xHm1&_nc_ht=scontent-fra3-1.jpg


... but for the curious: "Men who already had 10 beers will know what this is good for."
 
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  • #19,143
1716821397229.png
 
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  • #19,145
1716848274311.png
 
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  • #19,146
1716873604007.png
 
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  • #19,147
  • #19,148
Keith Richards Waiting For Electricity.jpg


Massage in a bottle.jpg


Too Young.jpg
 
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  • #19,149
1716926268859.png
 
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  • #19,150
Clearly, one of them ran faster than the other two.
 

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