Collection of Lame Jokes

[DennisN]

You lopped off the punchline...
View attachment 294356

"Can't be tight if it's a liquid"

 

[Hamiltonian]

uh oh!

 

[Keith_McClary]

You lopped off the punchline...

Shouldn't one of these be in there?

 

[ergospherical]

 

[jtbell]

There was a politician by the last name ' Pataki'.

I remember some people called him "Paturkey".

 

[jtbell]

What makes a man age?

His manager.

 

[Bandersnatch]

Wow. That is too lame even for this thread :D

 

[Hamiltonian]

View attachment 294408

Any child with a Jedi master is most probably a Jedi initiate, and Anikin being the choosen one and all, Maul probably could feel his force sensitivity.

 

[tribdog]

Lamest joke you know ...

What do you call a hippies wife?

Missus hippie.

 

[fresh_42]

 

[DennisN]

 

[WWGD]

 

[phinds]

 

[BillTre]

Text from a dog.

 

[valenumr]

 

[DennisN]

Trouble brewing...

More trouble brewing...

 

[fresh_42]

 

[Ibix]

Reminds me of a Hugh Dennis (I think) joke about the Bronze Age being, of course, the third best Age.

 

[WWGD]

 

[BillTre]

 

[BillTre]

 

[WWGD]

View attachment 294608

I bought gluten-free water for 50% off. And they say I'm ignorant!

 

[Keith_McClary]

View attachment 294608

87% less calories than our regular water!

 

[WWGD]

 

[Ibix]

Michelle? I see what you did there...

Time to dust off an old one, though. I have a racing snail, but he doesn't win very much. I thought I'd reduce weight and drag if I removed his shell, but it just made him more sluggish.

 

[Bystander]

just made him more sluggish.

Time for the "gag/finger down throat" emoticon.

 

[Ibix]

Time for the "gag/finger down throat" emoticon.

The racing snail gag is one of my favourites for exactly that reason!

 

[Ibix]

I looked up the "Sapporo diet water", and it turns out to be a real thing. Apparently it's got some vitamins and minerals dissolved in it, along with a sizeable dose of marketing pseudoscience about it helping you lose weight. Not a lot of evidence for the latter, it seems - you can imagine my surprise.

 

[BillTre]

Perhaps on FDA there?

 

[WWGD]

I looked up the "Sapporo diet water", and it turns out to be a real thing. Apparently it's got some vitamins and minerals dissolved in it, along with a sizeable dose of marketing pseudoscience about it helping you lose weight. Not a lot of evidence for the latter, it seems - you can imagine my surprise.

I heard it only helps your wallet lose weight ;).