Collection of Lame Jokes

[Orodruin]

View attachment 314937

I am apalled by the lack of appropriate units for speed.

 

[DaveC426913]

I am apalled by the lack of appropriate units for speed.

Reminds me of the atrocity committed by ultra-nerd Gil Grissom on CSI: Vegas:

"That's a five story fall. Terminal velocity is 9.8metres per second, so if he wasn't pushed, he should have landed about ... here."

It just gets worse the more you read it.

 

[dextercioby]

 

[phinds]

 

[phinds]

 

[phinds]

 

[Wrichik Basu]

The most difficult part of constructing a perpetual motion machine is hiding the batteries.

 

[fresh_42]

 

[fresh_42]

 

[dextercioby]

 

[DennisN]

 

[mfb]

This is a joke thread, but the moment begs the serious question: is 1,2,3 (permutated) the only real/complex solution to abc = a+b+c, when either of a, b, c cannot be 0?

You can solve for c = (a+b)/(ab-1).
As an example, another solution is a=3, b=7, c=1/2. It's easy to see from that expression that 1,2,3 is the only integer solution.

 

[Orodruin]

 

[jack action]

 

[Ibix]

Turn the tape over twice to access the secret C side...

 

[fresh_42]

Turn the tape over twice to access the secret C side...

I thought it should be played backwards.

 

[Ibix]

I thought it should be played backwards.

No, that plays the A side again. If you play the B side backwards you get the

side.

 

[DrGreg]

If you play the A side upside down you get all the sides.

Spoiler: I don't get it

Do you know what the maths symbol $\forall$ means?

 

[Ibix]

Whereas the B side upside down just plays the B side.

I'm reminded of a science puzzle book I had as a kid that showed a picture of the words CARBON DIOXIDE viewed through a bottle of water (so a cheap cylindrical lens, basically). Carbon was upside down, which they explained was due to blue light being more strongly refracted than red. Then they asked if you believed that and, if not, if you could see a simpler explanation.

 

[fresh_42]

Ok, we went from AB to CD. But why wasn't DVD EF and BD GH?

 

[DrGreg]

Whereas the B side upside down just plays the B side.

Or the ꓭ side?

 

[fresh_42]

Or the ꓭ side?

How did you type that? Do you have inverted keyboards?

 

[DrGreg]

How did you type that? Do you have inverted keyboards?

Joke answer: I'm in Australia.

Real answer: I did a Google search for "upside down B" and found https://text-symbols.com/upside-down/

 

[fresh_42]

I did a Google search for "upside down B" and found https://text-symbols.com/upside-down/

That is funny enough to make it on my list:

 

[fresh_42]

For all who want to see the rest:

https://www.physicsforums.com/threa...th-and-other-curiosities.970262/#post-6164027

... and I'm always open to suggestions, if new (we don't need another Nero) and, or funny.

 

[fresh_42]

 

[DaveC426913]

Ok, we went from AB to CD. But why wasn't DVD EF and BD GH?

Isn't that a Benny Hill bit? Or a Two Ronnies sketch?

"F U N E M N X?"
"S, V F M N X."

 

[DrGreg]

Isn't that a Benny Hill bit? Or a Two Ronnies sketch?

"F U N E M N X?"
"S, V F M N X."

Two Ronnies "Swedish made simple"

They predicted txtspk decades before it happened.

 

[jtbell]

I hear one of the railroads is going to start a special high-speed freight service for shipping poultry across the country.

It'll be called the "Pullet Train".

 

[jack action]

 

[fresh_42]

 

[Borg]

It wouldn't be complete without a barmaid though.

 

[jack action]

OK, I just found my new thing to spice up conversations:

 

[mfb]

Turn the tape over twice to access the secret C side...

That only works for USB.

And electrons.

 

[jtbell]

View attachment 315122

We're actually in the middle of a bathroom tub/shower renovation right now. We're getting both grab bars and the little shelves shown here. Now I have ideas for how to use the shelves.