Collection of Lame Jokes

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The discussion revolves around sharing and enjoying "lame" jokes, with participants contributing various puns and one-liners. Jokes include classic setups like "A duck walks into a pharmacy..." and "Why did the chicken cross the road?" along with playful wordplay, such as "What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick." The humor is characterized by its groan-inducing quality, with many jokes eliciting laughter despite their simplicity. Participants also engage in light banter about the nature of humor, with some jokes being deemed too funny to qualify as "lame." The thread highlights a shared enjoyment of corny humor and the camaraderie that comes from exchanging jokes, creating a lighthearted atmosphere.
  • #14,131
My grandpa has the heart of a lion...
and a permanent ban from the zoo.
 
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  • #14,132
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  • #14,133
1669397219128.png
 
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  • #14,134
Black Friday, anyone?

1669420575073.png
 
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  • #14,135
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  • #14,138
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Likes pinball1970, jack action, Ibix and 2 others
  • #14,139
1669533955317.png
 
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Likes pinball1970, jack action and fresh_42
  • #14,141
Seems legit.

FB_IMG_1669543808407.jpg
 
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  • #14,142
Window or Tea.jpg
 
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  • #14,144
1669564487967.png
 
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  • #14,145
How can you eat with that?

E6Q5LBsXEAQduRc.png
 
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Likes pinball1970, Borg, berkeman and 1 other person
  • #14,146
Punk's not dead.
FB_IMG_1669578853754.jpg
 
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Likes WWGD, Ibix, pinball1970 and 6 others
  • #14,147
WHEN THE TROUBLE STARTED:

While we were in bed, my wife and I were watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire I turned to her and said "would you like to have sex?" She said "no" so I asked her "Is that your final answer?". She said "yes" so I said "I'd like to phone a friend." And that's ...

My wife and I were at a restaurant. Since my wife was still looking at her menu the waiter asked me first what I would like. I said I'd like to have the rib steak, raw. He asked me if I wasn't worried about mad cow and I said no, she can order for herself. And that's when ...

My wife and I were at her high school reunion and she kept staring at a drunk who was sitting alone at the next table. I asked here what the deal was with him and she explained that he was her boyfriend in high school and that when she broke it off with him he got drunk and she had heard that he had stayed drunk ever since. Wow, I said, who whould have thought that someone could celebrate constantly for so long? And that's when ...

My wife sat down next to me as I was watching TV and she asked what was on the TV. Dust, I said. And that's when ...

My wife was in the bedroom naked, looking at herself in the full length mirror and she said that she felt dumpy and ugly and really needed me to give her a compliment. You're eyesight is really good, I said. And that's when ...

I rear-ended a car today, as the start of a really bad day. The guy in the other car got out and he was a dwarf. He gave me a stern look and said "I am NOT happy". I said, "So, which one are you?" And that's when ...
 
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  • #14,148
  • #14,149
Some signs in Chinglish to lighten up the day...

chinglish-7.jpg


jump.jpg


strange-juice.jpg
 
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  • #14,150
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  • #14,151
In the UK, right after a bombing. Look at the guy in the lower right
20221128_101517.jpg
 
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  • #14,152
WWGD said:
In the UK, right after a bombing. Look at the guy in the lower right View attachment 317845
So? We call that instinct.
 
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  • #14,153
Poor door... :frown:

Alarmed door.jpg
 
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  • #14,154
DennisN said:
Poor door... :frown:

View attachment 317846
Similar to the "disabled toilets", which always seemed a bit pointless if you read the sign literally. I notice they're now usually labelled "accessible toilets", although I don't think that's solely a reaction to grammatical ambiguity...
 
Last edited:
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  • #14,155
1669662324799.png
 
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  • #14,157
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  • #14,158
DennisN said:
Some signs in Chinglish to lighten up the day...

View attachment 317813

View attachment 317814

View attachment 317815
Another I think I've told before, but we lived in Brunei for a few months in the 1980s. Every restaurant that served alcohol had a (legally mandated, I guess) sign in Malay and English saying "Muslims are restricted to drinking alcohol in this restaurant". At least that's what the English said - I presume the Malay text said the exact opposite...
 
  • #14,159
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Likes davenn, Wrichik Basu, DrClaude and 4 others

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