Collection of Lame Jokes
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A politician dies and ends up at the pearly gates. Saint Peter says “We have a policy for people of your profession. You must spend one day in heaven and then one day in hell. Then you choose where you want to spend eternity.”
He goes to heaven first where he finds angels singing and people playing harps. Heaven seems very boring to him so the next day he goes to hell. To his surprise he sees lush greenery and luxury five star hotels instead of a barren waste land and people being tortured. He’s greeted by satan who is wearing a tuxedo and sipping a martini. He says “Hell is misrepresented by humans. We have luxury hotels, the best chefs and top notch sports facilities including a large pool.”
The politician spends the entire day enjoying the luxury in hell. The next day he is taken back to the pearly gates and chooses to live in hell from now on. He is sent to hell. But this time he sees a barren waste land illuminated only by rivers of lava and hears the screams of people being tortured. Once again he sees satan in his tuxedo sipping on a martini. He asks satan “What happened to the luxury hotels?” Satan replies “Yesterday we were campaigning and today you voted.”
He goes to heaven first where he finds angels singing and people playing harps. Heaven seems very boring to him so the next day he goes to hell. To his surprise he sees lush greenery and luxury five star hotels instead of a barren waste land and people being tortured. He’s greeted by satan who is wearing a tuxedo and sipping a martini. He says “Hell is misrepresented by humans. We have luxury hotels, the best chefs and top notch sports facilities including a large pool.”
The politician spends the entire day enjoying the luxury in hell. The next day he is taken back to the pearly gates and chooses to live in hell from now on. He is sent to hell. But this time he sees a barren waste land illuminated only by rivers of lava and hears the screams of people being tortured. Once again he sees satan in his tuxedo sipping on a martini. He asks satan “What happened to the luxury hotels?” Satan replies “Yesterday we were campaigning and today you voted.”
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Never gonna let you downWWGD said:
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Reptile keeper/marijuana farm...fresh_42 said:
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And they say German is difficult ...
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Got rickrolled in a whole new way.WWGD said:
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There's extra spice in teaching English in France...
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Saw something the other day that is both true and funny
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That probably comes out to be higher than their acting wages!jtbell said:
-Dan
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...to get your husbands to pay more attention to you?WWGD said:
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