- #21,151
- 20,782
- 28,298
“Hello. Is this the Alcoholics Anonymous counseling center?”
“Yes. How can I help?”
“How do you make a Tequila Sunrise?”
“Yes. How can I help?”
“How do you make a Tequila Sunrise?”
Collection of Lame Jokes
- Thread starter quddusaliquddus
- Start date
-
- Tags
- Jokes
Click For Summary
The discussion revolves around sharing and enjoying "lame" jokes, with participants contributing various puns and one-liners. Jokes include classic setups like "A duck walks into a pharmacy..." and "Why did the chicken cross the road?" along with playful wordplay, such as "What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick." The humor is characterized by its groan-inducing quality, with many jokes eliciting laughter despite their simplicity. Participants also engage in light banter about the nature of humor, with some jokes being deemed too funny to qualify as "lame." The thread highlights a shared enjoyment of corny humor and the camaraderie that comes from exchanging jokes, creating a lighthearted atmosphere.
- #21,152
- #21,153
- #21,154
Borg
Science Advisor
Gold Member
- 2,291
- 5,002
- #21,155
DaveC426913
Gold Member
- 23,973
- 8,077
Once I saw this guy on a bridge about to jump. I said, "Don't do it!" He said, "Nobody loves me." I said, "God loves you. Do you believe in God?"
He said, "Yes." I said, "Are you a Christian or a Jew?" He said, "A Christian." I said, "Me, too! Protestant or Catholic?" He said, "Protestant." I said, "Me, too! What franchise?" He said, "Baptist." I said, "Me, too! Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?" He said, "Northern Baptist." I said, "Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist or Northern Liberal Baptist?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist." I said, "Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region, or Northern Conservative Baptist Eastern Region?" He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region." I said, "Me, too!"
Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1879, or Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912?" He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912." I said, "Die, heretic!" And I pushed him over.
- Emo Phillips, 2005
He said, "Yes." I said, "Are you a Christian or a Jew?" He said, "A Christian." I said, "Me, too! Protestant or Catholic?" He said, "Protestant." I said, "Me, too! What franchise?" He said, "Baptist." I said, "Me, too! Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?" He said, "Northern Baptist." I said, "Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist or Northern Liberal Baptist?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist." I said, "Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region, or Northern Conservative Baptist Eastern Region?" He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region." I said, "Me, too!"
Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1879, or Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912?" He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912." I said, "Die, heretic!" And I pushed him over.
- Emo Phillips, 2005
- #21,156
BillTre
Science Advisor
Gold Member
2024 Award
- 2,694
- 11,827
- #21,157
jack action
Science Advisor
- 3,528
- 9,857
- #21,158
WWGD
Science Advisor
Homework Helper
- 7,742
- 12,920
My friend Bob in Alabama just had a child. Now he's a southpaw.
- #21,159
- 20,782
- 28,298
- #21,160
- 20,782
- 28,298
Don't use a big word when a singularly unloquacious and diminutive linguistic expression will satisfactorily accomplish the contemporary necessity.
- #21,161
jack action
Science Advisor
- 3,528
- 9,857
Apparently you can't use 'beefstew" as a password. It's not stroganoff.
- #21,162
- 19,370
- 15,579
- #21,163
- 20,782
- 28,298
Not surprising. It doesn't live in the Château Briand.jack action said:
- #21,164
Tom.G
Science Advisor
Gold Member
- 5,661
- 4,504
Must have originated by someone that can 'Talk the Talk' but can not 'Ambulate the Trip.'fresh_42 said:
- #21,165
- 20,782
- 28,298
My girlfriend almost missed her train this morning because she was using my oven clock as a guide. My oven clock! She can be glad she left in the right century!
- #21,166
berkeman
Admin
- 69,241
- 24,366
When my wife is baking something, it confuses the heck out of me because the oven clock displays the oven temperature instead. Doh!fresh_42 said:
- #21,167
- 20,782
- 28,298
- #21,168
- 20,782
- 28,298
- #21,169
dextercioby
Science Advisor
- 13,399
- 4,101
- #21,170
berkeman
Admin
- 69,241
- 24,366
- #21,171
- 20,782
- 28,298
- #21,172
dwarde
- 1
- 635
- #21,173
Swamp Thing
- 1,035
- 771
They laughed when I said I was going to learn to do poetry, because of my dislectia.
But they won't be laughing anymore... I've already made a vase, a bowl and a mug.
But they won't be laughing anymore... I've already made a vase, a bowl and a mug.
- #21,174
Ibix
Science Advisor
- 13,418
- 15,973
They were clearly potty.Swamp Thing said:
- #21,175
- 20,782
- 28,298
Possibly not the best choice of animal fur as a bath mat.
- #21,176
- 20,782
- 28,298
- #21,177
- 19,370
- 15,579
- #21,178
- 19,370
- 15,579
The fact that Keith Richards and Willie Nelson have outlived Richard Simmons has me rethinking the whole eating right and exercising thing.
- #21,179
- 20,782
- 28,298
- #21,180
davenn
Science Advisor
Gold Member
2024 Award
- 9,705
- 11,623