Collection of Lame Jokes

[jbriggs444]

Oh no, not meatloaf again!

 

[phinds]

 

[nsaspook]

 

[WWGD]

The " Oh Henry " candy bar makers added some Viagra to the bar. They renamed it " Oh, oh, oh , Henry".

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[BillTre]

 

[fresh_42]

View attachment 358354

It is a burden. E v e r y - s i n g l e - t i m e.

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[fresh_42]

Jumped on turtles: Italian plumber arrested for animal cruelty. Apparently he had taken mushrooms beforehand.

 

[Bandersnatch]

He's gone a bit nuts after an alligator dragged his girlfriend into a sewer.

 

[WWGD]

He's gone a bit nuts after an alligator dragged his girlfriend into a sewer.

Alligator, weren't those pizza-loving turtles?

 

[WWGD]

The Rock had another child. He called it Prudential: A piece of the Rock.

 

[jtbell]

While I was eating lunch at the local pizza place today, a couple sat down at the next table with their service dog.

I asked, "What kind of pizza does it like?"

"Pupperoni."

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[BillTre]

I guess that fixes her drinking problem!

 

[Orodruin]

 

[Orodruin]

 

[dextercioby]

 

[dextercioby]

 

[gmax137]

View attachment 358455

I sat in the cafeteria with some guys at lunch one day, it turns out they were all runners. They described their running routines, and the marathons they were training for. Eventually I spoke up to join the conversation. I told them I "ran a half marathon every few years." This surprised them (given my physique). I finally explained: if you counted every step I took at more than a shuffle, over a few years it would add up to a half-marathon.

 

[WWGD]

Neil Tyson is not optimistic about terraforming Mars. DeGrasse isn't greener for Neil.

 

[Orodruin]

 

[Orodruin]

 

[WWGD]

Maybe this is why he didn't get the Physics research position he wanted:

Interviewer:" Please recite Newton's 3 Laws".
Him: " I'm not a lawyer, I'm a Physicist."

 

[WWGD]

I ended up with a piece of garbage car. Following life lessons, I went and made some lemonade. It made no sense, though.

 

[phinds]

 

[DaveC426913]

The " Oh Henry " candy bar makers added some Viagra to the bar. They renamed it " Oh, oh, oh , Henry".

(I just whipped this up)