Collection of Lame Jokes

[Enigman]

Two wrongs don't make a Right but Three Rights Do Make a Left .

 

[Psinter]

Look! He's escaping like the adult he is!

 

[jtbell]

Today's weather tip:

If it's raining cats and dogs, be careful not to step in a poodle.

 

[Borg]

Today's weather tip:

If it's raining cats and dogs, be careful not to step in a poodle.

Must be a poodle day. I got this in my inbox this morning - Poodle Attack.

 

[Psinter]

They say: "You are what you eat."

I must be a boiled chicken then... and rice.

 

[Borg]

Did you hear about the redneck who was racing with a pop-up camper?

Spoiler

They called him Trailer Swift.

 

[dkotschessaa]

Lameness warning: You may die from the lameness of this joke that I made up while walking the dog yesterday...

Did you that they built a campground they built next to the marine wildlife sanctuary? They had to make separate areas, for all in tents and porpoises.

::bows:

-Dave K

 

[dkotschessaa]

Should have known it sort of existed... http://www.theoceanadventure.com/kids page/Jokes-Whale.html

::cries::

 

[AMenendez]

Girl, are you sin(x)? Well, I'm cos(x); why don't you get on top of me so that we can make tan(x)? ;)

 

[Psinter]

I realized I shouldn't be racist. That's why I equally hate everyone in the world. *grumpy*

 

[nuuskur]

I realized I shouldn't be racist. That's why I equally hate everyone in the world. *grumpy*

that's an interesting solution

 

[Enigman]

Every time you make a typo, the errorists win.

 

[jtbell]

 

[Ibix]

What's the difference between a coyote and a flea?

One howls on the prarie; the other prowls on the hairy.

 

[Psinter]

Just heard a woman say: "He made such intense eye contact... I love that man."

Which of course made me think of...

Eye Contact

duh
​

EDIT: To complete the combo, here is some more...

iContact

 

[Psinter]

【Shakespeare】

 

[Psinter]

Two lame jokes:

1. Rights were violated? Thank goodness I'm a lefty.
2. I'm not gay, but my boyfriend is.

 

[DaveC426913]

I'm not gay, but my boyfriend is.

This isn't very funny; lots of girls have this prob- ohhhhhhhhhhIgetit.

 

[OmCheeto]

 

[Ibix]

From my son's book:

Why can't pirates play cards?

Spoiler

They're sitting on the deck.

 

[Psinter]

From the radio:

What's another word for cute girl in English:

BBQ
-.-

 

[Sakamo]

How many alphabets are there between C and K?273.

 

[Sakamo]

Won't you join us?Just leave me argon!

 

[Sakamo]

U235 has no cation.

But a caution!

 

[cobalt124]

Why can't pirates recite the alphabet? - Because they always get stuck at C.
What do you get if you put root beer in a square glass? - Beer

 

[Sakamo]

Be aware of Paul Harvey.He is radioactive!

 

[Sakamo]

Cathodic protection works well

in Protestant countries!

 

[Sakamo]

Salt bridge, aka

Tacoma!

 

[Sakamo]

Bond Enthalpy is

007!

 

[Sakamo]

The cause of Evariste Galois' sudden death.
Half-life!