Collection of Lame Jokes

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The discussion revolves around sharing and enjoying "lame" jokes, with participants contributing various puns and one-liners. Jokes include classic setups like "A duck walks into a pharmacy..." and "Why did the chicken cross the road?" along with playful wordplay, such as "What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick." The humor is characterized by its groan-inducing quality, with many jokes eliciting laughter despite their simplicity. Participants also engage in light banter about the nature of humor, with some jokes being deemed too funny to qualify as "lame." The thread highlights a shared enjoyment of corny humor and the camaraderie that comes from exchanging jokes, creating a lighthearted atmosphere.
  • #4,551
jtbell said:
A teacher had to drive me home so I could get a fresh pair of pants.

bet mom wasn't impressed ( am assuming it was during your high school years?)
 
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  • #4,552
punctuation is important

upload_2018-5-2_10-13-1.png
 

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  • #4,553
upload_2018-5-2_10-26-17.png
 

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  • #4,555
DrGreg said:
Is it true that, in school chemistry lessons, if you can't achieve a solution you will get a suspension?
In the lab, the actions of some students do seem to precipitate a suspension.
 
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  • #4,556
DrGreg said:
Is it true that, in school chemistry lessons, if you can't achieve a solution you will get a suspension?
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
 
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  • #4,558
fresh_42 said:
... unfortunately I've found
I never claimed I was original :sorry:
 
  • #4,559
DrClaude said:
I never claimed I was original :sorry:
Yeah, I was just disappointed to lose the opportunity :frown: I'm always on the hunt to see some money for PF.
 
  • #4,560
What do you call it when Huey, Dewey, Louie and Donald are kidnapped by extraterrestrials?

An alien abducktion.
 
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  • #4,561
davenn said:
bet mom wasn't impressed ( am assuming it was during your high school years?)
No and yes. :-p
 
  • #4,562
jtbell said:
What do you call it when Huey, Dewey, Louie and Donald are kidnapped by extraterrestrials?

An alien abducktion.
And when they take Marvin the Martian too? An alien abduction...
 
  • #4,563
And if Huey et al. took Marvin... it would be an alien abducktion again!
 
  • #4,564
another bad grammar example

Don't think I would want to eat at that place

31706374_2011468562503879_2813098266281902080_n.jpg
 

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  • #4,565
The teacher said, he doesn't want to see always the same fingers in the air, so I raised my middle finger. Also wrong.
 
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  • #4,566
davenn said:
Don't think I would want to eat at that place
Doesn't sound very friendly, does it? I bet their customers are pretty rare.
 
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  • #4,567
fresh_42 said:
The teacher said, he doesn't want to see always the same fingers in the air, so I raised my middle finger. Also wrong.
My sister lives near a "request" train stop. According to the notice on the platform you must "make an appropriate gesture to the driver" to get the train to stop. I have a suspicion that a lot of people made the same "mistake" fresh is joking about...
 
  • #4,568
Ibix said:
My sister lives near a "request" train stop. According to the notice on the platform you must "make an appropriate gesture to the driver" to get the train to stop. I have a suspicion that a lot of people made the same "mistake" fresh is joking about...
Very likely by those, who tried to get off the train, while it didn't stop!
 
  • #4,569
What do you call it when a doctor with dubious credentials slams his car into a truck carrying a load of ducks?

A total quackup.
 
  • #4,570
"It's really nice here. I'll take the apartment!"

"We're in a wine cellar!"

"I'll take the apartment!"
 
  • #4,571
What's the difference between Batman and (Jesus)?
Batman has no parens.
 
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  • #4,572
A ham sandwich walks into a bar.
The bartender sees him, and says, "Sorry, we don't serve food in here!"
 
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  • #4,573
Have you heard about the new James Bond movie? An old nemesis returns, this time terrorizing the world with flocks of tiny angry birds with poison-tipped beaks.

It's called "Goldfinches".
 
  • #4,574
davenn said:
Don't think I would want to eat at that place
At least don't take your grandmother there. Someone might drop a comma and say "Let's eat Granny!"
 
  • #4,575
What do you call a dinosaur with one eye?

Doyouthinkitsaurus.
 
  • #4,576
What's red and doesn't fit down a rabbit hole?

A fire engine.
 
  • #4,577
Why can't you write with a broken pencil??
Because it's pointless.
 
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  • #4,578
Ibix said:
What do you call a dinosaur with one eye?
A dinosaur. It already has one eye (one 'i').
What would you call a dinosaur with two eyes?
A diinosaur.

Ibix said:
Doyouthinkitsaurus.
This one is a bit too obscure for me.
 
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  • #4,579
Mark44 said:
This one is a bit too obscure for me.
A variation on the one-eyed snake, perhaps?
 
  • #4,580
Mark44 said:
This one is a bit too obscure for me.
Maybe him?
 
  • #4,581
fresh_42 said:
Maybe him?
Looks like I'm not the only one who didn't get the joke.
 
  • #4,582
Do you think it Bucksaw us?
( I can't give it all away ):wink:
 
  • #4,583
256bits said:
Do you think it Bucksaw us?
( I can't give it all away ):wink:
OK, got it now...
 
  • #4,584
What is Bigfoot's favorite vegetable?

Sasquash.
 
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  • #4,585
What's round and dangerous?

A vicious circle.
 
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  • #4,586
Supposedly the lamest joke of all time...

What's brown and sticky?
A stick

Apoligies if this one has already been posted.
 
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  • #4,587
(This isn't a "lame" comic, so to speak, but it isn't a "science" based comic either, so I put it in this thread.)

I figure there are several coffee drinkers on this forum.

1526224521-20180513.png

[Source: https://www.smbc-comics.com/comic/coffee]
 

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  • #4,588
Mark44 said:
Supposedly the lamest joke of all time...

What's brown and sticky?
A stick

Apoligies if this one has already been posted.
It occurs to me that
A wooden leg
would be lamer. Or evidence of further lameness, at least.
 
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  • #4,589
Lol...
Ibix said:
It occurs to me that
A wooden leg
would be lamer. Or evidence of further lameness, at least.

Don't leave your day job yet... but, that is pretty good. . :ok:
 
  • #4,590
dominated by wife.jpg
 

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  • #4,591
land so flat dog running away.jpg


been through that region a few times storm chasing ... it is pretty flat !
 

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  • #4,592
davenn said:
View attachment 225840

been through that region a few times storm chasing ... it is pretty flat !
We say here: You can see on Thursday who will come for an afternoon tea on Sunday.
 
  • #4,593
davenn said:
been through that region a few times

Gee, there's even big fans to keep the cows cool... nice ! . :cool:
 
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  • #4,594
What do poker and plumbing have in common?

A straight flush beats a full house every time.
 
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  • #4,595
jtbell said:
Motivation for keeping your sewer pipes unclogged:

A straight flush beats a full house every time.
I'm not sure "like" is quite right for this one... ?:)
 
  • #4,596
The Earth is neither round nor flat ...

earth not round or flat.jpg


:biggrin::-p:biggrin:
 

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  • #4,597
davenn said:
The Earth is neither round nor flat ...
Lol, that picture could have been the cover for an ABBA song.... :redface:

bobby bob on You Tube said:
I think it's about a banana. Everybody has the right to my opinion.

Lame enough ?? ... lol
(But, I do love that song, though... . :ok:)

.
 
  • #4,598
Q: Why is the Earth curved?

A: Otherwise it wouldn't be a banana.
 
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  • #4,599
OCR said:
Lol, that picture could have been the cover for an ABBA song.... :redface:
bobby bob said:
I think it's about a banana. Everybody has the right to my opinion.
Lol, OK, just in case somebody " didn't get it " ... . :-p

.
 
  • #4,600
davenn said:
The Earth is neither round nor flat ...

View attachment 226057

:biggrin::-p:biggrin:
I can see Russia from my house. :oldtongue:
 

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