- #2,851
Pepper Mint
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I like this one most, it's more than being lame actually.
Collection of Lame Jokes
- Thread starter quddusaliquddus
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SUMMARY
This forum discussion centers around a collection of lame jokes shared by users, showcasing a variety of humor styles. Notable jokes include, "A duck walks into a pharmacy and says, 'Give me some chapstick and put it on my bill,'" and "What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick." Participants engage in light-hearted banter, with some jokes eliciting groans and laughter alike. The thread emphasizes the enjoyment of humor that is intentionally silly or absurd, appealing to those who appreciate puns and wordplay.
PREREQUISITES- Understanding of basic joke structure and humor types
- Familiarity with puns and wordplay
- Knowledge of cultural references in humor
- Ability to appreciate absurdity in comedic contexts
- Explore the history of puns in literature and comedy
- Research the psychology of humor and why people enjoy lame jokes
- Learn about different styles of comedy, including surrealism and absurdism
- Investigate the role of cultural references in joke-telling
Anyone looking to enhance their comedic repertoire, including aspiring comedians, writers, and individuals interested in the mechanics of humor. This discussion is particularly beneficial for those who enjoy light-hearted, silly jokes and want to understand their appeal.
- #2,852
DrGreg
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Don't bother telling a pun to a kleptomaniac. Kleptomaniacs take things literally.davenn said:
- #2,853
Pepper Mint
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DrGreg said:
Hilarious!- #2,854
jtbell
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A baseball umpire once got into a huge argument with a player and ejected him from the game. That player happened to be his son's favorite... and his son had been watching the game on TV. So when the umpire got home, his son snubbed him and refused to sit on his lap like he usually did. In other words:
The son never sits on the brutish umpire.
The son never sits on the brutish umpire.
- #2,855
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Q: The most favorite song of all golfers?
A: The first cut is the deepest.
... or was it boxer ...
A: The first cut is the deepest.
... or was it boxer ...
Last edited:
- #2,856
256bits
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has this one been done?
Seasoned lumberjack walks into the lumberjack store and says to the salesman, "
At my age I need something better than my axe to chop trees. I can now do only 2 cords of wood by swinging my axe. I need something better for my tired bones."
Salesman eyes him up. "You look like pretty strong fellow. With this model," showing him a 20-inch chain saw, " you are certainly to do double that - 4 cords a day and you will be home for supper. Every single client swears by it."
Some more discussion, and the impressed lumberjack buys the chainsaw.
Three days later, the lumberjack marches into the store in a rage. "You sold me a piece of junk! 1-1/2 cords is all I could get."
The salesman is perplexed. "If it is a faulty model, I can give you your money back, or exchange. Let me see the machine."
Having the chainsaw, the salesman pulls the cord, and it comes to life.
The lumberjack exclaims. "What's that noise?"
Seasoned lumberjack walks into the lumberjack store and says to the salesman, "
At my age I need something better than my axe to chop trees. I can now do only 2 cords of wood by swinging my axe. I need something better for my tired bones."
Salesman eyes him up. "You look like pretty strong fellow. With this model," showing him a 20-inch chain saw, " you are certainly to do double that - 4 cords a day and you will be home for supper. Every single client swears by it."
Some more discussion, and the impressed lumberjack buys the chainsaw.
Three days later, the lumberjack marches into the store in a rage. "You sold me a piece of junk! 1-1/2 cords is all I could get."
The salesman is perplexed. "If it is a faulty model, I can give you your money back, or exchange. Let me see the machine."
Having the chainsaw, the salesman pulls the cord, and it comes to life.
The lumberjack exclaims. "What's that noise?"
- #2,857
jtbell
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Mother: So what did you all do in Sunday school today?
Little girl: We learned about God and Cheez-Its.
Little girl: We learned about God and Cheez-Its.
- #2,858
davenn
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ohhh dear ...
https://scontent-syd1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/13226939_10154085000681291_6582447191622101317_n.jpg?oh=707e8490950aa97564763d9bf729034c&oe=57C7F51B
https://scontent-syd1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/13226939_10154085000681291_6582447191622101317_n.jpg?oh=707e8490950aa97564763d9bf729034c&oe=57C7F51B
- #2,859
jtbell
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Q: Why is the mycology course the most popular elective in the biology department?
A: The professor who teaches it is a real fun guy.
A: The professor who teaches it is a real fun guy.
- #2,860
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And I thought it was because the course takes place in the magic mushroom.jtbell said:
- #2,861
davenn
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jtbell said:
hahahaha ( I had to google mycology
)- #2,862
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Why did the toadstool feel squashed?
There wasn't mushroom
There wasn't mushroom
- #2,863
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I watched a TV show last night and burst into laugh when the comedian said "Never sit on your own stool".
- #2,864
Pepper Mint
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davenn said:
Oh uhm...yeah.
- #2,865
KaleLetendre
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Andy said:
Andy...chill
- #2,866
KaleLetendre
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What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college?
Bison [emoji23][emoji106][emoji23][emoji106][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]
Bison [emoji23][emoji106][emoji23][emoji106][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]
- #2,867
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Q: Why are mathematicians bad politicians?
A: They keep to get stuck after the division in "divide and conquer".
A: They keep to get stuck after the division in "divide and conquer".
- #2,868
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Why does nobody laugh at cow jokes?
They've herd them all before.
They've herd them all before.
- #2,869
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Come out, joke! You're closed in!Ibix said:
No, said the joke, I'm in the majority!
- #2,870
256bits
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Bazooka Joe bubblegum - the gum was lame and the jokes were lame.
Remember this one
Bazooka Joe - Andy. Why is you nose all red?
Andy - I got stung smelling a b-rose.
Bazooka Joe - Andy. There is no "b" in rose.
Andy - There was in this one.
Remember this one
Bazooka Joe - Andy. Why is you nose all red?
Andy - I got stung smelling a b-rose.
Bazooka Joe - Andy. There is no "b" in rose.
Andy - There was in this one.
- #2,871
jtbell
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Ibix said:
In other words: déjà moo.
- #2,872
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- #2,873
davenn
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hahalame joke alert !What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? One's heavy and the other's a little lighter!Ibix said:
D
- #2,874
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- #2,875
davenn
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lame chemistry jokes
- #2,876
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Erwin Schrödinger is speeding down the highway one day when a cop pulls him over. While he's asking Erwin for his license and registration, he notices that Erwin is sweating and acting kind of twitchy. The cop spot checks the car and sees nothing suspicious and then asks Erwin if there's anything in his trunk. Erwin replies, yes, I have a cat in the trunk. The cop replies, really, can I check it out? Erwin says, go right ahead.
Accordingly, the cop goes and opens the trunk and exclaims, "That cat is dead!" Erwin replies, "Well, it is now."
Accordingly, the cop goes and opens the trunk and exclaims, "That cat is dead!" Erwin replies, "Well, it is now."
- #2,877
davenn
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DiracPool said:
that's the lame version of this one I posted in science jokes several months ago ...
- #2,878
DiracPool
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davenn said:
Haha. I was guessing that I wasn't the first one to post that joke, but I didn't want to admit it and perhaps attenuate the impact for those who haven't heard it.
I actually just heard the joke for the first time last night on some TV drama show. I think it was "Bones," but I'm not sure. I just paraphrased the joke from memory, but it is funny...and lame.
- #2,879
mfb
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A cop stops Einstein for running a red light.
Einstein complains: "I'm sure it was green for me!"
The cop gives him a speeding ticket.
Einstein complains: "I'm sure it was green for me!"
The cop gives him a speeding ticket.
- #2,880
jtbell
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A post office sorting clerk received a letter addressed to:
Wood
John
Mass.
Who did it end up being delivered to? (Note: this was in the days before street addresses were necessary)
Wood
John
Mass.
Who did it end up being delivered to? (Note: this was in the days before street addresses were necessary)
John Underwood
Andover, Mass.
Andover, Mass.