Collection of Lame Jokes

[DaveC426913]

Note to self: Always bring a tennis ball in my carry-on luggage from now on...

Yeah. And roll it down the aisle during take-off.

 

[davenn]

 

[berkeman]

 

[gmax137]

Thanks @berkeman that hit my funny bone

 

[jtbell]

 

[Ibix]

View attachment 368683

See also the Scottish grit lorry tracker. Zoom in on a lorry to see its dad joke name.

 

[WWGD]

 

[jtbell]

The USDA has updated its food pyramid yet again!

 

[DaveC426913]

That's one of ours here in Hammtown! We had a plow naming contest a few years ago. Many entries are Hammtown references.

Chillin' Dylan: (Top vote-getter)

• Snowbi Wan Kenobi
• Scoop Dogg
• Icekee Waa Waa
• Blizzard of Oz
• Eugene Sleddy
• Sleetwood Mac
• Gordie Plow
• Austin Plowers
• Thaw Patrol

Popular Names from Previous Years (2023)

• Max Kermanator
• Plowy McPlowface
• CTRL-SALT-DELETE
• Clearopathra
• Icekee Wee Wee
• The Big Leplowski
• HAMBONI
• Betty Whiteout
• Mr. Plow
• Plowasaurus

More Creative Options (Shortlisted/Submitted)

• Taylor Drift
• Fast & Flurrious
• Say it Aint Snow
• Sled Zeppelin
• Darth Blader
• Better Call Salt

Taken from my driveway, four days ago:

 

[DaveC426913]

In Hamilton we like our puns, and our Timmy's Coffee.

This downtown puddle has persisted across several years and has become affectionately known as Lake Timmiekaka (AKA the Sixth Great Lake):

_{(Caveat: my BS detector tells me this image is Photoshopped for effect (reflections are hard!) - but the lake is real.)}

This may be a little more realistic:

 

[jtbell]

View attachment 368651

"I have a cousin who lives in Wales."

"You mean like Jonah did?"

 

[jtbell]

View attachment 368686

Especially the old-fashioned mechanical vending machines where you have to pull a knob out a foot or two!

 

[WWGD]

I changed my workout and now I do 10 planks each time. 10 is my Planks constant.

 

[berkeman]

 

[jtbell]

Dave gets in a robotaxi. A few minutes later:

"Faster, faster! I'm late for my appointment!"

"I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that."

 

[jtbell]