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Apparently wasn't a letter soup.BillTre said:
Click For Summary
The discussion revolves around a collection of science-related jokes and humorous anecdotes shared among forum members. A notable joke features a mathematician with a dog and a cow who are claimed to be knot theorists, leading to a playful exchange with a bartender. Other jokes include puns related to physics, such as Heisenberg's uncertainty principle and light-hearted takes on mathematical concepts. The conversation also touches on the nature of humor in science, with members explaining the nuances of certain jokes, particularly those involving mathematical notation. Additionally, there are references to classic jokes that have circulated over the years, illustrating how humor can bridge complex scientific ideas with everyday life. Overall, the thread highlights the community's appreciation for clever wordplay and the joy of sharing science humor.
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jack action
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jack action
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dextercioby
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DrGreg
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0 zerodextercioby said:
0 zero
(You won't understand my response if you don't have "Consolas" font installed on your device.)
Last edited:
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BillTre
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Ibix
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I am sure I posted the following one before, but it is good and deserves repeating:Ibix said:
- Is there a doctor on board?
- Yes! I have a PhD in population statistics.
- This man is having a heart attack! He is dying!
- Well, well … minus one.
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berkeman
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dextercioby
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gmax137
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Funny, I was just about to post this myself, lol.dextercioby said:
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Ibix
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The question is whether this information passes the smell test.dextercioby said:
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Ibix
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So much so, in fact, that it's been the leading cause of pipe corrosion ever since it got into our water system.Orodruin said:
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DrGreg
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Further information: https://www.abc.net.au/science/articles/2006/05/17/1631494.htm?site=science/greatmomentsinscienceOrodruin said:
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DaveC426913
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Inhaling even small amounts of it can lead to choking, lung damage and even death.Orodruin said:
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davenn
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ADMINISTRATIUM
The heaviest element known to science was recently discovered. The element, tentatively named Administratium, has no protons or electrons and thus has an atomic number of 0. However it does have 1 Neutron, 128 Assistant Neutrons, 75 Vice-Neutrons and 111 Assistant Vice-Neutrons. This gives it an atomic weight of 315. These 315 particles are held together in a nucleus by a force that involves the continuous exchange of meson-like particles called Morons.
Since it has no electrons, Administratium, is inert. However, it can be detected chemically as it impedes every other reaction with which it comes into contact. According to the discoverers, a minute amount of Administratium caused one reaction to take over four days to complete, when it would normally occur in less than one second.
Administratium has a normal life of approximately 3 years, at which time it does not decay but, instead, undergoes a reorganisation in which Assistant Neutrons, Vice-Neutrons and Assistant Vice-Neutrons exchange places. Some studies have shown that the atomic weight actually increases after each reorganisation.
Research at other laboratories indicates that Administratium occurs naturally in the atmosphere. It tends to concentrate at certain points such as government, large companies, health facilities and universities; and will often be found in the newest, best maintained buildings.
Scientists point out that Administratium is known to be toxic at any level of concentration and can easily destroy any productive reactions where it is allowed to accumulate. Attempts are being made to determine how Administratium can be controlled to prevent irreversible damage, but results to date are not promising.
Unobtainium,
n. A substance having the exact high test properties required for a piece of hardware or other item of use, but not obtainable either because it theoretically cannot exist or because technology is insufficiently advanced to produce it. Humorous or ironical.
—
Listed in "Interim Glossary, Aero-Space Terms," as compiled by Woodford Heflin and published in February 1958 by the Air University of the US Air Force.
The heaviest element known to science was recently discovered. The element, tentatively named Administratium, has no protons or electrons and thus has an atomic number of 0. However it does have 1 Neutron, 128 Assistant Neutrons, 75 Vice-Neutrons and 111 Assistant Vice-Neutrons. This gives it an atomic weight of 315. These 315 particles are held together in a nucleus by a force that involves the continuous exchange of meson-like particles called Morons.
Since it has no electrons, Administratium, is inert. However, it can be detected chemically as it impedes every other reaction with which it comes into contact. According to the discoverers, a minute amount of Administratium caused one reaction to take over four days to complete, when it would normally occur in less than one second.
Administratium has a normal life of approximately 3 years, at which time it does not decay but, instead, undergoes a reorganisation in which Assistant Neutrons, Vice-Neutrons and Assistant Vice-Neutrons exchange places. Some studies have shown that the atomic weight actually increases after each reorganisation.
Research at other laboratories indicates that Administratium occurs naturally in the atmosphere. It tends to concentrate at certain points such as government, large companies, health facilities and universities; and will often be found in the newest, best maintained buildings.
Scientists point out that Administratium is known to be toxic at any level of concentration and can easily destroy any productive reactions where it is allowed to accumulate. Attempts are being made to determine how Administratium can be controlled to prevent irreversible damage, but results to date are not promising.
Unobtainium,
n. A substance having the exact high test properties required for a piece of hardware or other item of use, but not obtainable either because it theoretically cannot exist or because technology is insufficiently advanced to produce it. Humorous or ironical.
—
Listed in "Interim Glossary, Aero-Space Terms," as compiled by Woodford Heflin and published in February 1958 by the Air University of the US Air Force.
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dextercioby
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dextercioby
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But which option did he pick?dextercioby said:
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Borg
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E to match his grades in school?Orodruin said:
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DrGreg
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dextercioby said:
Maybe about 39% of the audience didn't know the answer either, if we assume they guessed randomly (i.e. 10% randomly chose the correct answer)!
(Or maybe some audience members deliberately chose the wrong answer, for a laugh.)
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collinsmark
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gmax137
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Insipred by the recently closed "death ray" thread:
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Astronuc
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Well, those born after that picture was taken aren't in that picture yet - but ostensibly most of their atoms were.berkeman said: