Collection of Science Jokes P2

[fresh_42]

View attachment 230515

Two eyes for the cat and it would be perfect!

 

[Stavros Kiri]

Two eyes for the cat and it would be perfect!

It's looking backwards
[besides, double dot would be confusing for double derivative ...]

 

[fresh_42]

It's looking backwards

Yes, but it's not Schrodinger, it's Schrödinger.

 

[Stavros Kiri]

It's looking backwards
[besides, double dot would be confusing for double derivative ...]

Yes, but it's not Schrodinger, it's Schrödinger.

Yours then problem too! ...
And the cat does have the eyes in fact ...

 

[jack action]

Two eyes for the cat and it would be perfect!

Yes, but it's not Schrodinger, it's Schrödinger.

I thought the ears were the umlaut.

Beside, as long as the cat's eyes are closed, the cat is both facing frontward and rearward.

 

[DrGreg]

Time to recycle a previous post:

Never mind Schrödinger's cat, have you seen Heisenberg's? I'm not sure...

 

[Ibix]

View attachment 230515

Nice. Or make the g a cat, curled up with the descender being its tail? Beyond my art skills, I'm afraid.

 

[mfb]

Planck was there all the time, the logo is just too small to see with our current resolution.

 

[fresh_42]

The hadron physicist's morning prayer:

Spoiler

To decay, or not to decay, that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous protons,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles
And by opposing end them.

 

[BillTre]

Ran across one of my favorite old Dilbert cartoons recently:

 

[davenn]

The water cycle explained

 

[DennisN]

“To the optimist, the glass is half full.
To the pessimist, the glass is half empty.
To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.”

 

[chasrob]

Pavlov is sitting on a park bench when suddenly a phone rings.
"Oh crap!" he says. "I forgot to feed the dogs!"

 

[collinsmark]

Pavlov is sitting on a park bench when suddenly a phone rings.
"Oh crap!" he says. "I forgot to feed the dogs!"

Ha! ! That's going to have to be my new favorite joke!

 

[DennisN]

Bad news, everyone!

 

[nuuskur]

In that case I must say I have a very vivid imagination

 

[DennisN]

In that case I must say I have a very vivid imagination

I can imagine that!

 

[DrGreg]

So the last 6 years were all a dream? That explains a lot!

 

[davenn]

 

[Greg Bernhardt]

 

[mjc123]

Frank wasn't a monster. Frank made a monster.

 

[mfb]

Only a monster would have made such a monster.

 

[DennisN]

 

[nrqed]

Graffiti in a men's bathroom in Leipzig's university:

Heisenberg might have been here

 

[nrqed]

I swear this is a real quote from a math source. As a physicist, it made me laugh (might not be funny to mathematicians!)


Cayley's theorem, which says that any group is isomorphic to a certain subgroup of that group's group of isomorphisms.

 

[fresh_42]

Cayley's theorem, which says that any group is isomorphic to a certain subgroup of that group's group of isomorphisms.

Do you have a quote? I know Cayley as $G \leq \operatorname{Sym}_{|G|}$ in the finite case.

 

[nrqed]

Do you have a quote? I know Cayley as $G \leq \operatorname{Sym}_{|G|}$ in the finite case.

https://en.wikiversity.org/wiki/Introduction_to_Category_Theory/Monoids

 

[fresh_42]

https://en.wikiversity.org/wiki/Introduction_to_Category_Theory/Monoids

Thanks, and yes, that's the proof, but I don't see that $f_a$ are isomorphisms, only bijections! E.g. $f_a(1)=a \stackrel{i.g.}{\neq}1$. That was my problem: permutations are no homomorphisms. We have $G \longrightarrow \operatorname{Sym}(G)$ not $\operatorname{Aut}(G)$. If we restricted ourselves to conjugations, we would get all central elements in the kernel, so that doesn't work. Where are the automorphisms?

All we have are automorphisms in the category $\mathcal{Set}$ but this is a very misleading wording in this context, and to say "its isomorphisms" is wrong - at least as far as I know.

 

[DennisN]

The Time Stephen Met Jim Carrey

from http://www.boredpanda.com/funny-stephen-hawkings-jokes/

 

[jack action]

 

[Ibix]

That explains global warming, too!

Anthropomorphic global warming.

 

[DennisN]

 

[fresh_42]

View attachment 233019

Don't forget the paper! We were supposed to save paper!

 

[DrClaude]

Don't forget the paper! We were supposed to save paper!

Actually, I think that we have reached a point of diminishing paper. I basically no longer get any paper invoices and I read the newspapers online. Looking at the students, more and more are buying the textbooks as e-books and many assignments go directly from their computer to mine with no wood-derived product in-between.

 

[mjc123]

Except in between their ears...?
No, I'm sure your students are better than that!

 

[fresh_42]

Actually, I think that we have reached a point of diminishing paper.

All diagrams I can find on the internet are $O(t)$ since 1950. I haven't found a worldwide chart and the ones I've found ended in 2005 or so, which is why I don't post them. Yes, some paper traffic has gone electric, but the vast majority of papers are the n-th copy of a meeting protocol, the 10th-copy of a joke going around in emails, or the private copies of anything. Paper is still cheap and everybody is a Gutenberg. A few online invoices don't change the trend.

 

[Keith_McClary]

I haven't found a worldwide chart and the ones I've found ended in 2005

https://www.statista.com/statistics/270317/production-volume-of-paper-by-type/
Definition:

Graphic papers products are all around you and can be found in almost any home, office or business. These include a very wide variety of paper products for uses such as newspapers, inserts, supplements, A4 copy paper and printer paper, book paper, envelopes, forms, writing pads, high-quality magazines and brochures, company magazines, catalogues and annual reports.

 

[fresh_42]

 

[DennisN]

View attachment 233384

@Greg Bernhardt , when will PF/Latex support hieroglyphs?

 

[BillTre]

Yeah!
And Mayan codex too!

 

[Bandersnatch]

@Greg Bernhardt , when will PF/Latex support hieroglyphs?

Haven't you noticed? It already does:

$$H(g,\kappa) = H_{\phi,\kappa} + H_{\psi,\kappa} + g\colon\bar{\psi}\phi\psi\colon - \delta m^2(g,\kappa) - E(g,\kappa)$$

I think it says: 'Ptolemy was here', but Ptah only knows.

 

[fresh_42]

@Greg Bernhardt , when will PF/Latex support hieroglyphs?

 

[DennisN]

Yeah!
And Mayan codex too!

 

[Keith_McClary]

Have we done
Math with Bad Drawings
I’m Going on a Random Walk

 

[256bits]

That's funny.
He better be back before his supper gets cold, or if he's lucky maybe she will keep it warm in the oven.

 

[DarMM]

Haven't you noticed? It already does:

I think it says: 'Ptolemy was here', but Ptah only knows.

It's the Hamiltonian for the Yukawa theory, fairly standard QFT, you'd see it in intro books.

 

[Bandersnatch]

Oh, humour. That elusive beast.

 

[DarMM]

Oh, humour. That elusive beast.

I know it's a joke Mr. Silly, just thought I'd explain what it actually was.

 

[fresh_42]

https://www.scoopnest.com/user/cari...u-heard-of-pavlov-s-cat-via-bad-science-jokes

 

[Keith_McClary]

I’m Going on a Random Walk

In case this is not in your Physics curriculum:

Once again, however, our focus is on simple diffusion or the nearest-neighbor random walk. For these processes, the possibility of a diffusing particle making arbitrarily large excursions before certain trapping takes place leads to an infinite mean lifetime. On the other hand, the recurrence of diffusion in one dimension means that the particle must eventually return to its starting point. This dichotomy between infinite lifetime and certain trapping leads to a variety of extremely surprising first-passage-related properties both for the semi-infinite interval and the infinite system.

Section 3.1 (and the referenced Chapters 1-2).