Collection of Science Jokes P2

[Wrichik Basu]

 

[Ibix]

xkcd solves all major outstanding problems in cosmology: https://m.xkcd.com/2216/.

 

[collinsmark]

(Source: http://www.smbc-comics.com/comic/fun-fact)

 

[fresh_42]

 

[256bits]

xkcd solves all major outstanding problems in cosmology: https://m.xkcd.com/2216/.

So there really is something to the spherical cow concept.
Who knew.

 

[fresh_42]

 

[DennisN]

It was a busy day...

...first a scientific diet was tested at the lunchtable...

...and later in the lab they found a new toy...

...while the folks at the accelerator were doing new discoveries...

 

[DennisN]

Person 1: Did you hear about the musician and mathematician?

Person 1: Did you hear about the dancer and mathematician?
Person 2: No, what does he do?
Person 1: Mostly square dance.

 

[DifferentialGalois]

 

[fresh_42]

 

[mfb]

The angle doesn't depend on the mass :(

 

[256bits]

The angle doesn't depend on the mass :(

But the thing does look tilted somewhat.

 

[Ibix]

The angle doesn't depend on the mass :(

"Honey, am I fat?"

"No, you only violate the equivalence principle."

 

[Demystifier]

Scientists figured out that birthdays are extremely healthy. With a 3 sigma confidence they have shown that people with more birthdays tend to live longer.

They also found that smoking is healthy. The longer you smoke the longer you live.

 

[Demystifier]

Hidden variables solve all the mysteries.
https://www.gif-vif.com/backstage

 

[DrClaude]

They also found that smoking is healthy. The longer you smoke the longer you live.

https://tylervigen.com/page?page=1

 

[Ibix]

What do you get if you cross a sheep with an octopus?

A rebuke fom the ethics board.

 

[DennisN]

Hidden variables solve all the mysteries.
https://www.gif-vif.com/backstage

You've found Schrödinger's glass!

 

[ali PMPAINT]

She was wondering why he has not yet told anything.His silence was killing her and so she started the conversation.

She- What’s the date today?

He- 29th Oct, 14

She- (in a cold tone) What is special about today?

He- (adjusting his tie in front of the mirror) Yes! Today’s date 29 is a prime number.

She- (little infuriated)- Anything else?

He- (thinks)- Well yes, if we write the date as 29.10.2014 then sum of digits is 19 which is also a prime number.That’s strange! But why are you asking;

(He was so excited that she has started taking interest in numbers as well. When he looks at her; she was staring at him with a look that showed- “This guy is hopelessly unromantic”

She- (tries to control her anger and asks in a calm tone) Anything special about this day dear with respect to us?

He- Yes, the sum of our wedding date 29.10.2012 is 17 which is also a prime number. See I still rememberrrrrr….Oh dang….

Hey Darling! Happy 2nd Wedding Anniversary! Oh! 2nd..great.. that’s also a prime number.

He got death stares!

 

[collinsmark]

(Source: http://smbc-comics.com/comic/the-data)

 

[mfb]

Feynman's answer works as well:

Spoiler

It can produce some interesting results, but that's not why we do it.

 

[fresh_42]

What is the difference between a auto mechanic and a quantum mechanic?

Spoiler

A quantum mechanic can get his car into the garage without opening the door.

 

[nuuskur]

Operative word "can". The probability of that happening is very low indeed :D

 

[Ibix]

What is the difference between a auto mechanic and a quantum mechanic?

With a quantum mechanic, you take your car in and it's random whether it gets fixed and how much you are charged. Whereas with an auto mechanic... no, wait a minute...

 

[DrGreg]

What is the difference between a auto mechanic and a quantum mechanic?

Why are auto mechanics like actors?

Spoiler

They often have to wait to get the parts

 

[fresh_42]

 

[ali PMPAINT]

View attachment 251854

Is he/she dead?

 

[jack action]

 

[Ibix]

View attachment 251973​

Also known as the Ghostian distribution.

 

[jack action]

OP: Did humans invent math or did we discover it? Does math even exist?

Reply: Listen, all we were trying to do was keep track of some sheep and then differential calculus happened.