Collection of Science Jokes P2

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jack action said:
Canadians will understand:

My height and weight on my driver's license is in metres and kilograms, so there is always an exception to the rule.
By the way, ask me how much I weight or how tall I am it is in pounds and feet ( and inches ). go figure.
 
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jack action said:
Canadians will understand:


256bits said:
go figure.

Having holidayed in Canada recently, My wife and I were constantly giggling at the crazy mix of imperial and metric eg.

everything on the restaurant menu was metric except for the steak size 15 oz or whatever it was ...
it was a tiny wizened up bit of meat? in the middle of the plate. I usually go for a 300 - 400 gram steak.
Not huge but a respectable chunk :smile:

D
 
davenn said:
My wife and I were constantly giggling at the crazy mix of imperial and metric eg.
Some friends came over to the UK from Spain and wondered why we sell milk in units of 1.136 litres. Two pints, in metric.
 
Ibix said:
Some friends came over to the UK from Spain and wondered why we sell milk in units of 1.136 litres. Two pints, in metric.
And I like my bear in 341 ml bottles :smile:
 
Small bear! How do you get it in the bottle?
 
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DrClaude said:
And I like my bear in 341 ml bottles :smile:
0.6 pints? Really? We mostly get beer in half or pint sizes. Bottles are typically 500ml and cans either 330ml (same as a fizzy drink) or 500ml.

According to the old prole in 1984, half a liter of beer "just don't satisfy", but a liter's too much. Winston, who is after information, cynically notes that he ends up buying him two halves anyway...
 
mfb said:
That sounds cruel.
Ooooh, I got one...

It would bearly fit.
 
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Ibix said:
0.6 pints? Really? We mostly get beer in half or pint sizes. Bottles are typically 500ml and cans either 330ml (same as a fizzy drink) or 500ml.
Yes, really. It's 12 UK fluid ounces.
 
Ha - We still buy eggs by the dozen, lettuce by the head - is that a metric or imperial unit of measure?
 
jbriggs444 said:
Ooooh, I got one...

It would bearly fit.
got me a thinking -
Something to ponder about late at night in bed when you can't sleep.
Is bare meat when they take the fat off?
 
DrClaude said:
Yes, really. It's 12 UK fluid ounces.
Ah - what the 330ml cans approximate, I presume. I don't think I've seen 341ml bottles, though - maybe I haven't looked.
 
Ibix said:
Ah - what the 330ml cans approximate, I presume. I don't think I've seen 341ml bottles, though - maybe I haven't looked.
Then let me make some free publicity for my favorite beer:

rasseurs-du-Nord-Boreale-Biere-Rousse_OADA_670x500.jpg
 
DrClaude said:
Then let me make some free publicity for my favorite beer:
Canadian? Not sure it's available in the UK, but I'll keep an eye out.
 
256bits said:
Ha - We still buy eggs by the dozen, lettuce by the head - is that a metric or imperial unit of measure?
The lettuce one is metric. The imperial version is the off-with-his-head of lettuce.
 
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The alt-text on that one is good too - "More likely: Click on all the pictures of people who appear disloyal to [name of company or government]"
 
Ibix said:
Some friends came over to the UK from Spain and wondered why we sell milk in units of 1.136 litres. Two pints, in metric.

OMG, seriously, I would be wondering as well, it wasn't just done to 1litre, 2litre etc ?
 
davenn said:
OMG, seriously, I would be wondering as well, it wasn't just done to 1litre, 2litre etc ?
We used to sell it in pints, or simple multiples thereof. When we switched to using metric officially there was a huge outcry about it - largely from the type of conservative who (to quote David Eddings) "wouldn't change their underwear if they didn't have to". Carrying on selling in pints, just labelled differently, was a form of social judo. By changing literally nothing except the number on the bottle (and we'd had dual labelling for years anyway) they were more or less totally disarmed. And sensible metric quantities have slowly crept in - beer in 500ml cans isn't uncommon now, for example.

To be fair, I think there were concerns that shops would stop selling pints and start selling half litres but not change the price - a per-volume rise of over 13%. And since exactly that happened the other way around, at least in some places, when Europe introduced the Euro (many things got their prices rounded up to the next multiple of 5 cents, never down), there probably was some genuine concern.
 
Ibix said:
Canadian? Not sure it's available in the UK, but I'll keep an eye out.
It's from a microbrewery in Montreal.
 
Family Guy - How the Universe was made
 
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jack action said:
​

Normal people:

I want to kiss you 6 times!

Math people:

I want to kiss you 6! times
That was actually my first thought: 6! together with the question: where else would it make sense?
 
jack action said:
Normal people: I want to kiss you 6 times!

Math people: I want to kiss you 6! times
That reminds me (not actually a joke but a curious fact). Did you know that 10! seconds is exactly 42 days? Maybe that was the ultimate question.
 
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DrGreg said:
That reminds me (not actually a joke but a curious fact). Did you know that 10! seconds is exactly 42 days? Maybe that was the ultimate question.
Makes sense.
Earth was a giant supercomputer designed to find the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe and Everything. Designed by Deep Thought and built by the Magratheans, it was commonly mistaken for a planet, especially by the ape descendants who lived on it.
But as "days" varies in time, they have to hurry up reading the output.
 
Inspired by the lame jokes thread:

Why didn't Hamilton travel more?
If a city had a dead end there was no path for him.

Edit: Hmm... working on it.

Why did Hamilton get lost so often?
He couldn't find a path.
 
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