Come on chinese restaurants, get with the program

[Pengwuino]

I love Chinese food, but I hate chinese restaurants! Almost every chinese restaurant I go to, there is just a giant list of 482734 different meals, each with a slightly different name. The worst is that they never have a description. I honestly, when I go to a new place, I look for something with "chicken" in the title with other words i can pronounce and just hope to god I picked something good.

I know, I am such a cultured person.

Does anyone else have this problem? I love Italian restaurants because the descriptions themselves make you feel full. DISCUSS!

 

[JasonRox]

I love Chinese food, but I hate chinese restaurants! Almost every chinese restaurant I go to, there is just a giant list of 482734 different meals, each with a slightly different name. The worst is that they never have a description. I honestly, when I go to a new place, I look for something with "chicken" in the title with other words i can pronounce and just hope to god I picked something good.

I know, I am such a cultured person.

Does anyone else have this problem? I love Italian restaurants because the descriptions themselves make you feel full. DISCUSS!

In China there are many many many foods to choose from, so it makes sense that there are a lot.

Also, in China they are less picky, so they just try everything. Literally.

 

[Evo]

I don't know much about chinese food, so I stick with what I know. But even then, what is awesome at one restaurant can be awful at another. I know what you mean though, descriptions of sweet sauce, garlic sauce, spicy sauce, all tend to be too vague if you don't know what they are thinking. I think that is more due to not being familiar with the food than with the description. I've had "garlic sauces" that I would think would be savory that turned out to be sweet and spicy sauces that were bland.

I think the standard Italian and Mexican fare found on American menus that we are used to are pretty well known so we know what to expect. I'd say the descriptions are just as vague though "pasta in a tangy tomato sauce".

 

[Cyrus]

I love Chinese food, but I hate chinese restaurants! Almost every chinese restaurant I go to, there is just a giant list of 482734 different meals, each with a slightly different name. The worst is that they never have a description. I honestly, when I go to a new place, I look for something with "chicken" in the title with other words i can pronounce and just hope to god I picked something good.

I know, I am such a cultured person.

Does anyone else have this problem? I love Italian restaurants because the descriptions themselves make you feel full. DISCUSS!

http://www.theaterhopper.com/h_mag/Image/facepalm.jpg

(Sorry, I really wanted to use this somewhere).

 

[fileen]

I have one word for you: Buffet
Who cares what its name is, if its yucky you just pick something else. Eat till youre full and then eat a little more.
Theres a wonderful Tai restaurant my boyfriend and I enjoy and I remember ordering mango salad the second time I went there. I figured it would be light and fruity and delicious and I love mangoes. When I bit into it I immediately started to sweat and tears ran down my face it was so hot. I love cayenne and pride myself on being tolerant, but I wish they had specified how hot it was going to be! Now when I order it I specifically have to tell them not to make it hot, and put the hot sauce on the side. Sometimes if youre really friendly you can get your server to tell you what each dish is like, and what is good or popular.

 

[TheStatutoryApe]

I love Chinese food, but I hate chinese restaurants! Almost every chinese restaurant I go to, there is just a giant list of 482734 different meals, each with a slightly different name. The worst is that they never have a description. I honestly, when I go to a new place, I look for something with "chicken" in the title with other words i can pronounce and just hope to god I picked something good.

I know, I am such a cultured person.

Does anyone else have this problem? I love Italian restaurants because the descriptions themselves make you feel full. DISCUSS!

I always look at those menus trying to figure out what I want, weighing the likelihood that I may like this thing that I have never tried, and then I just order the usual.

 

[Moonbear]

I agree that it would be nice to have descriptions, especially when they call meals things like "Happy Family." Um, I assume they haven't chopped up the grandkids and tossed them into a wok, so some description there would be helpful.

I also wish that spicy always meant spicy. I have started to request everything "extra spicy" here just to get some small amount of spiciness on dishes that are supposed to be spicy.

As for things like garlic sauce, that's even more confusing. There isn't just one kind of garlic sauce. So, I might like the chicken with garlic sauce one place (I like the one that's a brown sauce, very savory along with the garlic) and find it completely bland at another where it's the clear garlic sauce. I realize there are different styles of Chinese cooking, and some of these differences might be regional, but then they should clarify this somehow on a menu.

But, on the plus side, I found a new Chinese restaurant near my new house, and the food there is the best I've found in this town so far! It's a little hole-in-the-wall that I never even noticed until I was looking at houses, and as we passed it, my realtor just happened to mention it was her favorite. So, I decided to give it a try. Indeed, she knows her Chinese food. The place mostly does take-out...a whole 6 tables in the place, and if you eat in, everything is served in the to-go containers (which is great for me, since I always take some with me anyway, and I wasn't there for the plates). The best indication it was going to be good food is nobody working there spoke much English...the person taking my order needed me to point to what I was ordering on the menu (I'm not sure if he needed the number rather than name, or if he needed to see the Chinese characters next to the English words).

On the downside, the new place is outside the delivery area for the two pizza places I've found that I like (but one will deliver to a parking lot half way...it sounds weird, but if I can avoid driving all the way downtown to get my pizza, it might be worth it).

 

[JasonRox]

Also keep in mind that most Chinese restaurant owners are Chinese so describing what the food is can be hard for most of them.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Does anyone else have this problem? I love Italian restaurants because the descriptions themselves make you feel full. DISCUSS!

My contention is that Italian restaurants provide the least amount of value for the cost. When you eat in a decent restaurant, you are paying more for the service, atmosphere, and location, than you are for the food. Since pasta is an inexpensive food, there is less value for the same price compared to most other food options.

I started to notice this back in LA when Tsu and I ate out a lot. One night it hit me that I'm paying $25 for a plate of noodles. That's nuts! I can whip up some Fettucini Alfredo for a few bucks.

As for Chinese food, don't be so picky and try new things. The best meal I have ever had was in a [spendy] indonesian restaurant in Amsterdam. I still have no idea what I ate, but all seven courses were unbelievably good.

 

[TheStatutoryApe]

I started to notice this back in LA when Tsu and I ate out a lot. One night it hit me that I'm paying $25 for a plate of noodles. That's nuts! I can whip up some Fettucini Alfredo for a few bucks.

Theoretically you are paying for the quality of ingredients and skill of the chef. I've certainly had some crappy Fettucini Alfredo but also some that was very good.
While seemingly simple a marinara may have years of experience and experimentation behind its supposed perfection but spaghetti marinara is something you can easily whip up at home in a half hour for a couple bucks.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Theoretically you are paying for the quality of ingredients and skill of the chef. I've certainly had some crappy Fettucini Alfredo but also some that was very good.

There are some dishes that are worth paying the extra but I never noticed any great difference is the quality of the basic dishes. I think fettuchini in particular is what caught my attention. As far as I was concerned, what we made at home in a few minutes was as good as any that I've had in a good restaurant.

If you get into specialty restaurants, I agree that the quality can vary a lot. But if you look through the LA phone book and choose ten Italian restaurants from the yellow pages, I doubt if you could tell much of a difference between them. In fact some of the best food I've ever had came from relatively obscure and inexpensive locations. This was especially true of Mexican food. I've eaten in some of the best and worst Mexican restaurants, but the best tacos I've ever had were bought at a hole-in-the-wall in gangland LA.

What really fries my tortilla is that even many "good" Mexican restaurants are now using those prefab cardboard shells. That is downright sacrilegious!

 

[gravenewworld]

The rise of the Chinese all you can eat buffets have absolutely decimated the quality of authentic Chinese restaurants in the US. The only place around here to get quality Chinese is in Chinatown. If you don't live near a major city, then it is hard to get good Chinese. I know what you are talking about, but the best way to figure out Chinese cuisine is to just simply try it all.

 

[russ_watters]

I love Chinese food, but I hate chinese restaurants! Almost every chinese restaurant I go to, there is just a giant list of 482734 different meals, each with a slightly different name. The worst is that they never have a description. I honestly, when I go to a new place, I look for something with "chicken" in the title with other words i can pronounce and just hope to god I picked something good.

I know, I am such a cultured person.

Does anyone else have this problem? I love Italian restaurants because the descriptions themselves make you feel full. DISCUSS!

So...you're blaming the restaurant owner for your indecisiveness and unwillingness to try new things?

 

[TheStatutoryApe]

If you get into specialty restaurants, I agree that the quality can vary a lot. But if you look through the LA phone book and choose ten Italian restaurants from the yellow pages, I doubt if you could tell much of a difference between them. In fact some of the best food I've ever had came from relatively obscure and inexpensive locations. This was especially true of Mexican food. I've eaten in some of the best and worst Mexican restaurants, but the best tacos I've ever had were bought at a hole-in-the-wall in gangland LA.

What really fries my tortilla is that even many "good" Mexican restaurants are now using those prefab cardboard shells. That is downright sacrilegious!

I know all too well about taquerias. Some of them are absolutely amazing.
Unfortunately I have yet to find a cheap hole in the wall italian food place that is good. The only one I have found was not so good and the food even made me sick the last time I ate there.

 

[Moonbear]

My contention is that Italian restaurants provide the least amount of value for the cost. When you eat in a decent restaurant, you are paying more for the service, atmosphere, and location, than you are for the food. Since pasta is an inexpensive food, there is less value for the same price compared to most other food options.

I started to notice this back in LA when Tsu and I ate out a lot. One night it hit me that I'm paying $25 for a plate of noodles. That's nuts! I can whip up some Fettucini Alfredo for a few bucks.

If all you're getting is pasta, find a better Italian restaurant. I don't go to restaurants to buy pasta dishes...those are far too easy to cook at home. The things I look for in an Italian restaurant are the ones I can't make at home...veal saltimbucca, osso bucco. I also will get the seafood dishes. The only time I'll order a dinner with pasta in an Italian restaurant is if they have homemade gnocchi...but you never just get those with sauce on it, rather it's usually incorporated into a bigger dish with vegetables, a meat, an interesting sauce (I had one once with a creamy pumpkin sauce and autumn vegetables which was REALLY tasty...and just perfect for the cold, drizzling day when I was getting the food).

 

[Dadface]

The rise of the Chinese all you can eat buffets have absolutely decimated the quality of authentic Chinese restaurants in the US. The only place around here to get quality Chinese is in Chinatown. If you don't live near a major city, then it is hard to get good Chinese. I know what you are talking about, but the best way to figure out Chinese cuisine is to just simply try it all.

Same here in the UK and better still visit a Chinese restaurant with a Chinese friend a Thai restaurant with a Thai friend and so on.They will be familiar with the cuisine and can order stuff which is not on the normal menu.I get confused going in Mcdonalds.What are those burgers about?

 

[GCT]

I love Chinese food, but I hate chinese restaurants! Almost every chinese restaurant I go to, there is just a giant list of 482734 different meals, each with a slightly different name. The worst is that they never have a description. I honestly, when I go to a new place, I look for something with "chicken" in the title with other words i can pronounce and just hope to god I picked something good.

I know, I am such a cultured person.

Does anyone else have this problem? I love Italian restaurants because the descriptions themselves make you feel full. DISCUSS!

Chinese food - American Chinese food that is - is pretty much all the same stuff ... meat , vegetables lots and lots of vegetables , and corn starch for that thick sauce. There are two dishes however that separate itself from the pack - Kung Pao and Mongolian Beef. If they have thai dishes then go with Pad Thai.

Italian food is pretty much the same thing also , it's just a different blend of cheese , meat , pasta. They give you so little so you have to pay a hefty amount to get your fill. Also , a lot of Italiana restaurants aren't authentic e.g. pasta from Walmart.

 

[Jimmy Snyder]

It is a source of amazement to me that my wife likes to eat in American Chinese restaurants, even cheap takeouts. The ingredients and cooking style are so different from what she knew in Taiwan that I don't think she would have guessed it was Chinese food on first sight. She laughs when she talks about Chop Suey because she never heard of it before she came here and the name amuses her. "What is that? Chop chop chop sue I don't know?" There was a Taiwanese restaurant that opened nearby and the dishes were as authentic as you could get using local ingredients and very delicious. Unfortunately, the building looked like a Chinese takeout and people would come in expecting Moo Goo Gai Pan or General Tsao's Chicken and such which weren't on the menu. They went out of business in a hurry.

 

[TheStatutoryApe]

Italian food is pretty much the same thing also , it's just a different blend of cheese , meat , pasta. They give you so little so you have to pay a hefty amount to get your fill. Also , a lot of Italiana restaurants aren't authentic e.g. pasta from Walmart.

Italian food here is really Italian American food.

It is a source of amazement to me that my wife likes to eat in American Chinese restaurants, even cheap takeouts. The ingredients and cooking style are so different from what she knew in Taiwan that I don't think she would have guessed it was Chinese food on first sight. She laughs when she talks about Chop Suey because she never heard of it before she came here and the name amuses her. "What is that? Chop chop chop sue I don't know?" There was a Taiwanese restaurant that opened nearby and the dishes were as authentic as you could get using local ingredients and very delicious. Unfortunately, the building looked like a Chinese takeout and people would come in expecting Moo Goo Gai Pan or General Tsao's Chicken and such which weren't on the menu. They went out of business in a hurry.

I've been to only one authentic chinese restaurant in California. It was very expensive and full of japanese people.

 

[Huckleberry]

I can never leave without commenting, "I just ate enough to feed a family in China for a week." I've been told it's an annoying habit. Probably not true either. I guess I should stop saying that.

Give me a plate of boiled mud with water chestnuts and I'll be happy. Water chestnuts make everything better. Anything cheap to throw in the furnace will suffice. The only thing about fancy restaurants that impresses me is the price. It's not too hard to find good food and atmosphere at affordable prices. The grapevine is a better place to search for them than the phone book.

I've noticed a lot of restaurants in Portland have decent menus. I think it's because it seems like every other person here is a vegetarian or vegan. It's just good for business.

 

[mgb_phys]

It must be simpler going to an English restaurant in China!

Going to an English restaurant in India is easier ;-)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=huSP7PtctC4

 

[Pengwuino]

So...you're blaming the restaurant owner for your indecisiveness and unwillingness to try new things?

I'm willing to try new things but I don't want the meal I pay for to come down to me basically throwing a dart at the menu and eating whatever it lands on. When I could easily go somewhere else and pay another establishment to give me food with an actual description that I know I'll like, I don't find it satisfying to play cuisine roulette with my money. Maybe I'm strange like that.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

I've noticed a lot of restaurants in Portland have decent menus. I think it's because it seems like every other person here is a vegetarian or vegan. It's just good for business.

Portland has many great restaurants! Have you ever eaten at the Iron Butterfly? They are awesome!

Edit: Heh, I meant the Iron Horse.

I used to eat at Cuchina Cuchina's at least twice a week, but now they are gone. There was also a great ME food restaurant called Sobeys that I would frequent [not sure of the spelling anymore].

What really blew me away was when I spotted an Ethiopian restaurant down by the Rose Garden. I don't think I had ever seen one before! There was also a Guatemalan restaurant that we tried, but it was pretty much just bland Mexican food.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

If all you're getting is pasta, find a better Italian restaurant. I don't go to restaurants to buy pasta dishes...those are far too easy to cook at home. The things I look for in an Italian restaurant are the ones I can't make at home...veal saltimbucca, osso bucco. I also will get the seafood dishes. The only time I'll order a dinner with pasta in an Italian restaurant is if they have homemade gnocchi...but you never just get those with sauce on it, rather it's usually incorporated into a bigger dish with vegetables, a meat, an interesting sauce (I had one once with a creamy pumpkin sauce and autumn vegetables which was REALLY tasty...and just perfect for the cold, drizzling day when I was getting the food).

I can't eat most seafood, which puts a real damper on my menu choices.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

I'm willing to try new things but I don't want the meal I pay for to come down to me basically throwing a dart at the menu and eating whatever it lands on. When I could easily go somewhere else and pay another establishment to give me food with an actual description that I know I'll like, I don't find it satisfying to play cuisine roulette with my money. Maybe I'm strange like that.

Just ask what it is. As soon as you learn how to speak Chinese you'll be set.

 

[junglebeast]

I'm willing to try new things but I don't want the meal I pay for to come down to me basically throwing a dart at the menu and eating whatever it lands on. When I could easily go somewhere else and pay another establishment to give me food with an actual description that I know I'll like, I don't find it satisfying to play cuisine roulette with my money. Maybe I'm strange like that.

Boring.

 

[Werg22]

One thing I don't understand about (Western) customers in Chinese restaurants is their insistence on using chopsticks. If you can't pick so much as a shrimp with them, use a fork. If you can use chopsticks but are more comfortable with a fork, use a fork. I once asked someone why they did it and they said it was to "show respect to the culture". Yeah, I'm sure the restaurant workers have nothing better to do than look for who isn't using chopsticks. And if an oriental man pulled chopsticks out and ate with them at a Western restaurant, nobody would say a word as nobody would care.

 

[Pengwuino]

Just ask what it is. As soon as you learn how to speak Chinese you'll be set.

I think one day i was so embarrassed at this whole predicament that after lunch, i went on wikipedia and just started looking up every food name i could remember (a grand total of 2...). Too bad that didn't help. I remember going to a thai/chinese place up in vancouver, BC that actually had some half decent descriptions! That was nice. It was my first time at a thai place and I had always heard they use peanut sauce in some of their dishes and I was intrigued and got some chicken in peanut sauce or something simple like that and oh my god, that place is lucky its 1000 miles away or id eat there all day. Anyhow, more to hte point, I'm too easily embarrassed to ask what's on the menu. "What's this? and this? and this? and this? and this? ok ill have that, butwait, what's this?".

One thing I don't understand about (Western) customers in Chinese restaurants is their insistence on using chopsticks. If you can't pick so much as a shrimp with them, use a fork. If you can use chopsticks but are more comfortable with a fork, use a fork. I once asked someone why they did it and they said it was to "show respect to the culture". Yeah, I'm sure the restaurant workers have nothing better to do than look for who isn't using chopsticks. And if an oriental man pulled chopsticks out and ate with them at a Western restaurant, nobody would say a word as nobody would care.

I don't get these people either! To me it's like the people who would go to Japan and walk around in public with a kimono (although i don't know anyone that drastic... and they'd probably get the hint of how stupid they looked fairly quickly...). Who cares? What's worse, having the "embarrassment" of preferring to use silverware you were born and raised on, or fumbling around with your food like an idiot :P

 

[Hurkyl]

Chopsticks are part of the experience.

I don't generally like Asian food, but I still have a couple sets of chopsticks I use for eating white rice, when the mood strikes.

 

[rootX]

Just ask what it is. As soon as you learn how to speak Chinese you'll be set.

which is pretty easy..

http://www.asianjoke.com/chinese/chinese_translation.htm

 

[tribdog]

I use chopsticks to eat my Top Ramen.

 

[TheStatutoryApe]

I generally use chopsticks when I eat chinese or japanese food and sometimes ramen. I learned how to use them when I was pretty young, my step father is japanese.

 

[JasonRox]

Chopsticks are easy to use.

Imagine eating sushi with a fork. That would be so stupid.

 

[Moonbear]

Chopsticks are pretty easy to use, and I think they are easier for eating Chinese food than a fork. A few times, I've gotten take-out and the person picking it up didn't get chopsticks...it was very hard to eat it with a fork. Sometimes, I even use chopsticks to eat other meals I cook for myself. Those foods that are hard to stab or scoop with a fork in any non-messy way, but aren't quite finger food are good candidates for chopsticks.

 

[Werg22]

Chopsticks are easy to use.

Imagine eating sushi with a fork. That would be so stupid.

Why? I'm thinking the only time when chopsticks are the better choice is when stabbing the thing is ineffective. But sushis clearly do not fall in that category.

 

[atyy]

Fat choy - hair vegetable? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chinese_New_Year

 

[TheStatutoryApe]

Why? I'm thinking the only time when chopsticks are the better choice is when stabbing the thing is ineffective. But sushis clearly do not fall in that category.

If you "stab" most sushi it will likely fall apart. Most often you can eat it with your fingers but in many cultures that is not considered to be very good table manners. Chop sticks work quite well if you can use them. And really it isn't that hard if you give it a bit of practice. I learned when I was around about five years old.

edit: I actually still don't hold them properly apparently, though they work just as well anyway, I have had a lovely japanese exchange student try to show me how to hold them properly (another benefit of using chop sticks ).

 

[atyy]

I'm willing to try new things but I don't want the meal I pay for to come down to me basically throwing a dart at the menu and eating whatever it lands on. When I could easily go somewhere else and pay another establishment to give me food with an actual description that I know I'll like, I don't find it satisfying to play cuisine roulette with my money. Maybe I'm strange like that.

Most Chinese places that do this are pretty cheap, so I actually just pick at random something that sounds interesting. If it's inedible I don't come back. If it's mediocre I give it another chance. If it's still mediocre on the second try, I don't come back. Or you can do Panda Express , since you get to see what it looks like first!

 

[Pengwuino]

Chopsticks are pretty easy to use, and I think they are easier for eating Chinese food than a fork. A few times, I've gotten take-out and the person picking it up didn't get chopsticks...it was very hard to eat it with a fork. Sometimes, I even use chopsticks to eat other meals I cook for myself. Those foods that are hard to stab or scoop with a fork in any non-messy way, but aren't quite finger food are good candidates for chopsticks.

Yah the food definitely goes well with chopsticks (duh!). Of course, i'll pay $10 to see someone eat a steak with chop sticks!

If you "stab" most sushi it will likely fall apart. Most often you can eat it with your fingers but in many cultures that is not considered to be very good table manners. Chop sticks work quite well if you can use them. And really it isn't that hard if you give it a bit of practice. I learned when I was around about five years old.

I don't find it too hard to "stab" sushi :) I also just pick it up sometimes too haha!

 

[atyy]

Most things here are pretty descriptive: http://www.southseaseafoodvillage.com/images/togo-menu.pdf

 

[Huckleberry]

Portland has many great restaurants! Have you ever eaten at the Iron Butterfly? They are awesome!

Edit: Heh, I meant the Iron Horse.

I used to eat at Cuchina Cuchina's at least twice a week, but now they are gone. There was also a great ME food restaurant called Sobeys that I would frequent [not sure of the spelling anymore].

What really blew me away was when I spotted an Ethiopian restaurant down by the Rose Garden. I don't think I had ever seen one before! There was also a Guatemalan restaurant that we tried, but it was pretty much just bland Mexican food.

I haven't eaten at the Iron Horse. I'll have to check it out.

I've been here like 3 and 1/2 years and only this year have I really started to make any effort to get out and explore the city and meet people. My best friend lives in SE Portland and just last month was the first time I've been to his house to catch up and meet his 2 year old son and his newborn daughter for the first time. I've been a terrible friend to everyone recently. I think I'll invite him to the Iron Horse on your recommendation. Thanks.

 

[Jimmy Snyder]

Yah the food definitely goes well with chopsticks (duh!). Of course, i'll pay $10 to see someone eat a steak with chop sticks! I don't find it too hard to "stab" sushi :) I also just pick it up sometimes too haha!

15 years ago the Japanese press was lamenting the fact that young people didn't know the proper use of chopsticks. Instead of using them to pick things up as an extension of the fingers, they were bringing the ricebowl to their mouths and using them in a shovelling motion, In Japan they commonly pick up the sushi with their fingers although not all do and I do not. The rice in American Chinese restaurants, especially the cheap takeouts is normally long grain which does not stick together like the short grain rice used in China and Japan. That makes it very difficult to pick up with chopsticks. Finally, where chopsticks are used, the food is prepared with that in mind, cut into bite sized pieces. In our house, when my wife broils a steak, I cut it that way to serve. Penqwuino will be welcome to share a steak dinner with us at home and please bring 10 bucks.

 

[Born2bwire]

This is pretty much how it is in China. The food names are not very descriptive and most of the time they just translate it for the restaurants in the States (for what of it is authentic). But really, how is it any different? Look at western cuisine. "Chicken Fried Steak," "Green Bean Cassarole," "French Dip," etc. None of those convey any more meaning then "Three Cup Sauce Chicken," "Sweet and Sour Pork," or "Phoenix's Paw." You get an idea of an ingredient and maybe the preparation and that's it. We just take it forgranted that we know what it is already.

In the end, you could just ask.