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Dating as an undergrad.

  1. Oct 26, 2013 #1
    I was wondering should I date as an undergrad or wait till I go to grad school, Or wait till I am done with school. And how important is it to find someone that has common interests that you share. I thought maybe I would find a girl that has a strong interest in physics that way it would give us something to talk about.
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  3. Oct 26, 2013 #2


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    It depends on so many things. But in my college years, I didn't date for most of the upper division classes - I just didn't have the time.
  4. Oct 26, 2013 #3
    ya thats what I was thinking upper level physics and math take a lot of time. what if other people are kinda interested in you.
    Last edited: Oct 26, 2013
  5. Oct 26, 2013 #4


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    There is no reason you can't date as long as it doesn't interfere with your school work.
  6. Oct 26, 2013 #5
    is it pretty important to date someone with common interests, what makes a relationship work.
  7. Oct 27, 2013 #6


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    Date someone with whom one is comfortable. I dated a number of different women, and generally I enjoyed their company, but most were sufficiently different or had different interests such that we didn't get serious.

    Dating is a way to learn about each other.

    In terms of long term relationships, it helps to share core values and in some cases mutual or compatable interests, views and goals.
  8. Oct 27, 2013 #7


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    You should never turn down any chance to gain experience with dating as long as you somewhat fancy the other person, date as much as possible. It’s doubtful that you’ll have time for school and serious relationships, but it isn’t impossible. Further, dating and relationships like anything else, take time and experience to build up a certain level confidence and comfort.

    Not to mention the sex is good for stress relief.

    You don't need shared academic interest per say, there are plenty of ways you can find common ground. Sometimes it’s far more interesting to date someone completely unlike you, as you'll become more well rounded by proxy.
  9. Oct 28, 2013 #8


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    If you wait until the "ideal" time to date there's a good chance you'll miss out on a lot of great opportunities.

    My advice is to take it as it comes. If school is your priority right now there's no reason that has to change, even if you start dating, even if you enter into a serious relationship.
  10. Nov 5, 2013 #9
    Yes! :)
  11. Dec 6, 2013 #10
    ok so i should date to gain experience, and not be closed off and live in isolation. What if i have crazy irrational fears?
  12. Dec 6, 2013 #11


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    I had a girlfriend for most of my undergrad. If anything it made it easier, when study stress piles up (and it inevitably will) it's good to have someone you can rely on. You can have that with friends of course but my point is that having a partner shouldn't be a hassle, it should be hassle relief (at the very least).
  13. Dec 6, 2013 #12
    study stress, like taking QM, and E&M and a math topics course at the same time, I thought i was going to have an anxiety attack. ok thanks for everyone's advice. This might sound crazy but what about suppressing my feelings about dating by thinking about certain things or doing certain things?
  14. Dec 6, 2013 #13

    Vanadium 50

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    No, you should date someone if you enjoy their company.

    Dating will not cure these. You should talk to a psychologist or a psychiatrist about this.
  15. Dec 6, 2013 #14


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    In my experience trying to ignore the fact that you want a relationship is at best impossible and at worse damaging. You can't wish away your feelings. What you could do is not spend a lot of time trying to meet people but if it happens then just roll with it.
  16. Dec 10, 2013 #15
    I just broke up from my 2 year long relationship ( I just started college and I am 18). She was a professional zip line guide, and a classics major at UCLA. She was just a bit too crazy for me, while she sounds great on paper, she screams and gets in fights. Physically hurt me on multiple occasions.

    Point being, I think you should date around in order to figure out your interests. Way too young for a long term relationship, but it is a perfect time to figure out what time of person would be good for you in later years. Also as student 100 said, if you get that sex...it is a great stress relief, but can also make you attached/
  17. Dec 21, 2013 #16
    Work to live, not live to work.
    Don't promise yourself jam tomorrow.
    Carpe Diem

    etc etc

    Any why should it matter even if it does? Life is for living.
  18. Dec 21, 2013 #17


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    And then you'll wait until you've finished your postdoc. But then your work takes up time. And when you retire, ..., ah well, you get the point.

    You don't have to go out every week just to meet someone if you don't have the time or don't like it. But if you meet someone interesting, go for it! I didn't date until after university and I am sorry I didn't because it feels like I missed out on an important bit of social development.
  19. Dec 30, 2013 #18


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    Only date really rich girls, they are more fun.
  20. Jan 2, 2014 #19
    If a car is going to run you over, attempt to move out the way. If they is a someone you like, attempt to take her out on a date.
  21. Feb 2, 2014 #20
    All I'm gonna say is that this never stopped Feynman and he turned out to be an "ok physicist"
  22. Feb 2, 2014 #21
    thats a good point the only people i know in math and science that didn't date are newton and paul erdos
  23. Feb 2, 2014 #22


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    I didn't date hardly at all in undergrad, but that's mainly because there were hardly any girls at my school.
  24. Feb 3, 2014 #23
    Weird question - date when you want to. Level with your partner and let them know exactly where you want to take it. It's going to happen sooner or later, so just jump in the water and learn to swim ^^ ..or drown or, of course, stay seemingly unharmed if you decide to avoid the water at all costs.
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