Does Love Hinder Personal Achievement?

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Discussion Overview

The discussion revolves around the question of whether being in love hinders personal achievement. Participants explore the implications of love on individual focus, emotional well-being, and success in various aspects of life, including financial stability and personal fulfillment.

Discussion Character

  • Debate/contested
  • Conceptual clarification
  • Exploratory

Main Points Raised

  • Some participants suggest that being in love may distract individuals from personal goals and achievements, allowing for greater concentration on self if one is not in love.
  • Others argue that love brings happiness and fulfillment that outweighs financial success, emphasizing emotional connections over material wealth.
  • A participant shares a personal experience of a life-altering event that shifted their perspective on love and success, indicating that emotional well-being can be prioritized over financial gain.
  • There are claims that love can be irrational, but some participants contend that irrationality is a broader human condition not limited to love.
  • Some participants express that love can enhance success by providing support and shared experiences, making burdens easier to bear.
  • Questions are raised about historical figures like Einstein and whether their achievements would have been greater without romantic involvement.
  • One participant posits that the fear of loneliness drives the desire for family and companionship, suggesting a philosophical view on the nature of existence and relationships.

Areas of Agreement / Disagreement

The discussion features multiple competing views on the relationship between love and personal achievement, with no consensus reached. Participants express a range of opinions on the benefits and drawbacks of love in relation to success.

Contextual Notes

Some arguments depend on personal definitions of success and happiness, and the discussion includes varying assumptions about the nature of love and its impact on rationality.

Is it better for people who like to aim high to not be in love?

  • Yes

    Votes: 13 40.6%

  • No

    Votes: 19 59.4%
  • Total voters
    32
tgt
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For those who like to achieve high, is it better to not be in love? You won't be irrational and can concentrate only on yourself and the things you want to do.

The only think of course is not having a family and be alone when you're old.
 
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no, it is never better to not be in love.
 
tribdog said:
no, it is never better to not be in love.

that's more politically correct but how is it in reality?
 
tgt said:
For those who like to achieve high, is it better to not be in love? You won't be irrational and can concentrate only on yourself and the things you want to do.

The only think of course is not having a family and be alone when you're old.

That depends on if the person loves you back.
 
because you may make more money if you never fall in love, but if you are in love you can be happy with less money. I used to be into making money and I was a cynic then I walked into my house and someone was robbing it. They stabbed me in the neck and it totally changed me. I am not successful when it comes to making money. I'm pretty broke most of the time, but I don't care. I know what happens when you die and I know what is really important. It is so great to be in love. It is so great to want to come home and see someone you love. It is so great to roll over in bed and put your arm around someone you love. It fills you up in ways that your wallet never can.
 
tgt said:
For those who like to achieve high, is it better to not be in love? You won't be irrational and can concentrate only on yourself and the things you want to do.

The only think of course is not having a family and be alone when you're old.

Can you please explain how it's NOT irrational? Seriously, I insist you explain.
 
I can't speak for others, but I am much better off in love.

On the practical side, my wife and I spend time taking care of each other, but since my wife has a part time job outside the home while I have a full time job, I think I come off better. Also, I have children. For all my efforts in other areas, they are my best accomplishment.

On the emotional side, what's to discuss?
 
tgt said:
The only think of course is not having a family and be alone when you're old.

This one thing, but it is not the only thing. For example, being alone can be lonely even when one is not that old. At a wedding a couple of months ago:

http://img120.imageshack.us/img120/4311/familyqg1.jpg

Also, in spite of the fact that some people don't want to experience the roller coaster feelings of love, other people very much *do* want to experience the roller coaster feelings of love.

that's more politically correct but how is it in reality?

It seems that you think such feelings are a bother, but as with anything human, it can't be expected that the entire population shares the same opinion.

A post of mine from a year ago:

https://www.physicsforums.com/showthread.php?p=1396378#post1396378.
 
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Hey George, nice family. You look like Einstein in that picture.
 
  • #10
JasonRox said:
Can you please explain how it's NOT irrational? Seriously, I insist you explain.

Firstly, do you agree that love makes you irrational?

I guess you could be irrational even without being in love.
 
  • #11
tgt said:
Firstly, do you agree that love makes you irrational?

I guess you could be irrational even without being in love.

Of course love is irrational. But a large part of human beliefs, emotions, and decisions are irrational regardless of whether they're in love or not, so it would be a stretch to say that love is what makes you irrational.

I almost think your question would be better rephrased, "Would it be better to be a Vulcan with no emotions than a human?"
 
  • #12
George, your wife is beautiful, your daughter is absolutely gorgeous, and you 'do" lokk a bit like Einstein in that picture! Great family!

I have to say that I don't even know if I could fall in love. I might like someone, but love...eh.
 
  • #13
tgt said:
Firstly, do you agree that love makes you irrational?
Only if one let's it be so. Being in love or loving someone doesn't necessarily make one irrational.

Infatuation is irrational.

I guess you could be irrational even without being in love.
Yes - that is certainly possible.

For me, loving people in the sense of caring about them is part of what life is all about.
 
  • #14
Evo said:
George, your wife is beautiful, your daughter is absolutely gorgeous, and you 'do" lokk a bit like Einstein in that picture! Great family!

jimmysnyder said:
Hey George, nice family. You look like Einstein in that picture.

I concur. I can't wait to see GJ in 20 years time. Just don't get your picture taken with your tongue hanging out. :biggrin:
 
  • #15
tgt said:
Firstly, do you agree that love makes you irrational?

I guess you could be irrational even without being in love.

Ever think that it might be irrational not to experience the human condition?

You only get one ticket on the ride. Would you close your eyes to the wonder of it all?

Tennyson said:
I hold it true, whate'er befall;
I feel it, when I sorrow most;
'Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.
 
  • #16
George Jones said:
This one thing, but it is not the only thing. For example, being alone can be lonely even when one is not that old. At a wedding a couple of months ago:

http://img120.imageshack.us/img120/4311/familyqg1.jpg

Also, in spite of the fact that some people don't want to experience the roller coaster feelings of love, other people very much *do* want to experience the roller coaster feelings of love.



It seems that you think such feelings are a bother, but as with anything human, it can't be expected that the entire population shares the same opinion.

A post of mine from a year ago:

https://www.physicsforums.com/showthread.php?p=1396378#post1396378.

Is this the same daughter that was just born?
 
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  • #17
tgt said:
For those who like to achieve high, is it better to not be in love? You won't be irrational and can concentrate only on yourself and the things you want to do.

The only think of course is not having a family and be alone when you're old.

I love 'love' itself and people in good love. It must be something good :biggrin:
 
  • #18
Love is just a mental state where one is not fully in control, i am not a Vulcan or a silk handkerchief poet, i just think love is wanting something/one and being lucky if you get it.
 
  • #19
I think being in love makes it easier to be successful. You have someone to share your burdens with, along with the celebrations. Overall, it makes the burdens easier to overcome and the joys of success more fun to celebrate.
 
  • #20
Re: Is it better to not be in love?

Was Einstein never in love?

If he had never been, would he have accomplished more? Would he have aimed higher?
 
  • #22
I guess in the realm of scientific acheivment, being single and devoting 18 hours of work a day could probably yield better/more results. In my opinion, that's not a very good way to spend one's life.

I'm not married (only 21), but I would want to live life with a companion that I can share the best times with, as well as someone that I can get through the hard times with.
 
  • #23
LowlyPion said:
Re: Is it better to not be in love?

Was Einstein never in love?

If he had never been, would he have accomplished more? Would he have aimed higher?

He did marry his cousin, not your normal type of love.
 
  • #24
tgt said:
The only think of course is not having a family and be alone when you're old.

Well, I believe you're always alone to begin with. The idea of family and all that is just to hide that fear and insecurity of accepting that you're alone. You'll die alone and nothing will remain whether or not you like it.

Don't run from the "fear" and "insecurity" of being alone. You'll never run fast enough. The best thing to do is to live the best possible life alone and share it with others. Being with others will never imply you're not alone whether they promise to not leave you or not because that's just false security.
 
  • #25
chasely said:
He did marry his cousin, not your normal type of love.

yeah--I thought the same thing. maybe it was 'his' way of 'playing it "safe" '--not to be 'hurt' by LOVE (ever again)----

has anyone ever noticed how many times 'love' is used on some of those 'home shopping' networks?---"You'll LOVE this!"---"I LOVE this new..." --that much 'loving' gets a little annoying after awhile... of course, it's 'meant' to get the endorphins/adrenaline going


Personally, I love being in love-----I think it all depends on how one can handle it--and whether or not 'being in love' has a good history in one's life (like just after a break up, or being assaulted/abused in one's history)
 
  • #26
chasely said:
He did marry his cousin, not your normal type of love.

I believe that was his second marriage.
 
  • #27
LowlyPion said:
I believe that was his second marriage.

Yeah it was, after she took care of him through his illness.
 
  • #28
chasely said:
Yeah it was, after she took care of him through his illness.

So that's not to suggest then that Einstein didn't experience love.
 
  • #29
I think it depends on one's attitude 'what' example someone uses too. You can 'pick' Newton or you can 'pick' Feynman
 
  • #30
http://img120.imageshack.us/img120/4311/familyqg1.jpg
einst_rad.jpg

Separated at birth?
 
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