- #1
Alfonso
- 4
- 0
I need an idea or inspiration for a discreet birthday gift :(
A little bit of background on me. I am 20. I am studying Aerospace Engineering with Mathematics, Physics, and Pre-Med minors. I have been diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome. I am also a grapheme and auditory synaesthete. And I have hypoxia. Terrible. About my only consistencies are my practice of martial arts and reading books. Especially classics. I am artistically inclined at my most stressful, and productive, times. I come from a family of poverty. My parent is a single mother who was abusive. My step-brother too. I've dabbled in a high-variety of different drugs. And I overdosed three months ago at an attempt at suicide. They were actually over-the-counter pharmaceuticals. I like Chemistry. Anyone watch Breaking Bad here? :) I draw on myself a lot with permanent marker. Tattoos would be cool but I get bored of them. Well, those are probably enough high-impact things to aid you in helping me. Oh, and I plan ahead.
I had a friend some time ago. Which is awfully rare for me. As it seems for a lot of others here. So, yay, relation. We were really close. Immensely different, but it illustrated to me that we had more to share, right? Anyway. We were really close. Past-tense. Transferring schools was her idea. So I did, at her encouragement. I guess I'm easy to coax. And I don't care what I study, I feel like I can do anything, academically of course, and it doesn't matter so much as I go to medical school. Socially, I'm dead. I've been here a year and I haven't spoken to anyone other than my two roommates (I've known them since middle school). Not even my professors. In an attempt to stay away I usually just try to memorize lectures. Everything I know about social etiquette is through what I read and I have a notepad specifically when I find myself in a social environment. Mostly birthday parties I throw for my middle school friends. Anyway, this friend I had. We were close. Strictly platonic. At least, I think. We would just hang out. Text each other. Call when we were a long distance away. Go bowling, play tennis, go running, pool table, ping pong, movies, sleep together, make breakfast for each other, try clothing on, save her from alcohol poisoning (this is also a big part of my social environment experiences), save her from family anger, and a plethora of small and odd things. So, my second semester here, a week before school starts, she says her family is having money problems (her mother later confirms this to me), and it would help them if I roomed with her. I felt uneasy. Uneasy because, I already had a lease signed with my other two roommates. I talked to them about it, one was reluctant to agree but understood the situation and supported me mildly, and the other I don't think was listening because he was taken back later. I searched, we search a bit together, but mostly I did since she was out of town some days. I found one. Then through some miscommunication, I ended up paying both non-refundable, applications fees ($100), and the deposit down ($300), while her parents got her into the dormitory again. When I tried to bring it up, it ended unfavorably with her being angry at me for "wasting [her] time". I mean, I could have shot back, that I invested more of my time in this than she did, I lost $100 out of it, and I probably lost some of my roommates' trust (I am still with them though). But I didn't. I sank my battleship and left. I haven't spoken a word to her since. Which is easy for me, you know? I don't talk anyways.
But her birthday is coming up. And at one point in time I cared a lot about her. Non-romantically. I just valued our friendship. It was fun. And I guess I'd like to remind her that I cared about her at one point. Many points even. But I can't do a letter, a hug, no phone call, or anything like that. She can't have a visual of me. I don't want her to know that the gift is from me. Not directly. I guess if she had to know she'd have to take an educated guess. So indirectly then. I started thinking about this in October. There's only two weeks left. Her birthday is the 22nd. She'll be 20. And my mind is gravitating toward napalm. Why? I have no idea. But that's not good, and I think I'm just getting tunnel vision. So I figured I'd try here from other creative minds. She's a cinematography major. She loves movies, she's open-minded, her favorite color is orange, she's into indie music, her favorite ice cream is cookie dough flavor, her favorite pizza is buffalo flavor, she likes games, her favorite book is Catcher in the Rye, and she'd like to make a film on that... There's a little background on me, her importance to me, our conflict, on her, and stuff. Stuff is good insight.
Thanks for reading me out.
A little bit of background on me. I am 20. I am studying Aerospace Engineering with Mathematics, Physics, and Pre-Med minors. I have been diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome. I am also a grapheme and auditory synaesthete. And I have hypoxia. Terrible. About my only consistencies are my practice of martial arts and reading books. Especially classics. I am artistically inclined at my most stressful, and productive, times. I come from a family of poverty. My parent is a single mother who was abusive. My step-brother too. I've dabbled in a high-variety of different drugs. And I overdosed three months ago at an attempt at suicide. They were actually over-the-counter pharmaceuticals. I like Chemistry. Anyone watch Breaking Bad here? :) I draw on myself a lot with permanent marker. Tattoos would be cool but I get bored of them. Well, those are probably enough high-impact things to aid you in helping me. Oh, and I plan ahead.
I had a friend some time ago. Which is awfully rare for me. As it seems for a lot of others here. So, yay, relation. We were really close. Immensely different, but it illustrated to me that we had more to share, right? Anyway. We were really close. Past-tense. Transferring schools was her idea. So I did, at her encouragement. I guess I'm easy to coax. And I don't care what I study, I feel like I can do anything, academically of course, and it doesn't matter so much as I go to medical school. Socially, I'm dead. I've been here a year and I haven't spoken to anyone other than my two roommates (I've known them since middle school). Not even my professors. In an attempt to stay away I usually just try to memorize lectures. Everything I know about social etiquette is through what I read and I have a notepad specifically when I find myself in a social environment. Mostly birthday parties I throw for my middle school friends. Anyway, this friend I had. We were close. Strictly platonic. At least, I think. We would just hang out. Text each other. Call when we were a long distance away. Go bowling, play tennis, go running, pool table, ping pong, movies, sleep together, make breakfast for each other, try clothing on, save her from alcohol poisoning (this is also a big part of my social environment experiences), save her from family anger, and a plethora of small and odd things. So, my second semester here, a week before school starts, she says her family is having money problems (her mother later confirms this to me), and it would help them if I roomed with her. I felt uneasy. Uneasy because, I already had a lease signed with my other two roommates. I talked to them about it, one was reluctant to agree but understood the situation and supported me mildly, and the other I don't think was listening because he was taken back later. I searched, we search a bit together, but mostly I did since she was out of town some days. I found one. Then through some miscommunication, I ended up paying both non-refundable, applications fees ($100), and the deposit down ($300), while her parents got her into the dormitory again. When I tried to bring it up, it ended unfavorably with her being angry at me for "wasting [her] time". I mean, I could have shot back, that I invested more of my time in this than she did, I lost $100 out of it, and I probably lost some of my roommates' trust (I am still with them though). But I didn't. I sank my battleship and left. I haven't spoken a word to her since. Which is easy for me, you know? I don't talk anyways.
But her birthday is coming up. And at one point in time I cared a lot about her. Non-romantically. I just valued our friendship. It was fun. And I guess I'd like to remind her that I cared about her at one point. Many points even. But I can't do a letter, a hug, no phone call, or anything like that. She can't have a visual of me. I don't want her to know that the gift is from me. Not directly. I guess if she had to know she'd have to take an educated guess. So indirectly then. I started thinking about this in October. There's only two weeks left. Her birthday is the 22nd. She'll be 20. And my mind is gravitating toward napalm. Why? I have no idea. But that's not good, and I think I'm just getting tunnel vision. So I figured I'd try here from other creative minds. She's a cinematography major. She loves movies, she's open-minded, her favorite color is orange, she's into indie music, her favorite ice cream is cookie dough flavor, her favorite pizza is buffalo flavor, she likes games, her favorite book is Catcher in the Rye, and she'd like to make a film on that... There's a little background on me, her importance to me, our conflict, on her, and stuff. Stuff is good insight.
Thanks for reading me out.
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