I swear I wouldn't touch anything, I'll keep my hands in my pockets.

[tribdog]

Can I be a mentor for one day if I promise not to ban anyone, or change anything, or say anything or do anything? I just want to see everything on PF once and it just gnaws on me to know there are places I can't see. Plus Moonbear is always teasing me saying stuff like "haha, you can't follow me to the good threads" and calling me a loser. Okay, I made up the Moonbear stuff but I'd still like to see what I'm missing. I picture the mentor lounge as having smell-o-vision or something.

 

[Defennder]

Just ask them to post a screenshot of their godly powers in action, such as the options to ban posters, delete posts, lock threads etc.

 

[lisab]

Kind of like the teacher's lounge in elementary school...I would find a reason to pass by it from time to time. It was filled with cigarette smoke, and you could hear the teachers cackling and even (gasp!) swearing...

 

[tribdog]

Just ask them to post a screenshot of their godly powers in action, such as the options to ban posters, delete posts, lock threads etc.

doesn't work that way. I have to be able to BE there. It's a power trip thing. I don't have to do something to enjoy it I just have to be ABLE to do something.

 

[Defennder]

Erm, why would you need to be able to do something if you don't plan to do anything?

 

[tribdog]

I was the kid who always touched the stuff he was told not to touch. I'm the guy who ends up pushing the "Do not push this button" button. I never said there was a logical reason for my asking for this. I want it because I can't have it.

 

[Moonbear]

Can I be a mentor for one day if I promise not to ban anyone, or change anything, or say anything or do anything? I just want to see everything on PF once and it just gnaws on me to know there are places I can't see. Plus Moonbear is always teasing me saying stuff like "haha, you can't follow me to the good threads" and calling me a loser. Okay, I made up the Moonbear stuff but I'd still like to see what I'm missing. I picture the mentor lounge as having smell-o-vision or something.

Nah, no smell-o-vision, that's just Zz passing gas.

LOL, lisab, about teacher's lounges...they really were awful when we were kids, weren't they?! I don't think the seediest bars I've been in as an adult have ever been as smoke-filled and had so many people inside cussing like sailors as the teachers' lounge in my elementary school or Jr. high. Though, if for some reason a student HAD to knock on the door to find a teacher in an emergency, the sudden silence of the whole room stopping their conversations because a student was present was unnerving. Apparently, NOTHING they were saying could be said in front of kids.

 

[Hurkyl]

We keep you out for your own protection. We are the keepers of a thousand arcane secrets. And each one would drive you MAD! MAD![/size]

 

[Astronuc]

Kind of like the teacher's lounge in elementary school...I would find a reason to pass by it from time to time. It was filled with cigarette smoke, and you could hear the teachers cackling and even (gasp!) swearing...

Actually, it's more like a basement or janitors closet with a big garbage and recycling bins, and lots of cleaning supplies.

 

[tribdog]

So let me in. There should be some sort of honorary thing for pure longevity. I was posting at PF before 99% of the mentors could spell PF. Make it like one of those doctorates they offer to the stars of ER or like that one job where you don't make any decisions or have any power vice president. I'm not going to beg, but please c'mon please.

 

[Evo]

I was the kid who always touched the stuff he was told not to touch. I'm the guy who ends up pushing the "Do not push this button" button. I never said there was a logical reason for my asking for this. I want it because I can't have it.

So let me in. There should be some sort of honorary thing for pure longevity. I was posting at PF before 99% of the mentors could spell PF. Make it like one of those doctorates they offer to the stars of ER or like that one job where you don't make any decisions or have any power vice president. I'm not going to beg, but please c'mon please.

Hah! After your confession that you WOULD push buttons that you were told not to! You would blow up the forum. You *know* you would.

Plus as Hurkyl said, the powerful ancient knowledge that you would be exposed to would certainly drive you mad.

 

[tribdog]

et tu Evo?

 

[OAQfirst]

I hear PF has the real Golden Stool hiding here somewhere, tribdog. That's why they can't let anyone in without a series of tests. Wars have broken out over it. The first test has something to do with pancakes, motor oil, and a porcupine. I don't want to imagine what that is, exactly.

 

[tribdog]

I would have thought I'd get something for starting the "thread killer champions" thread, but since I was forgiven for that I think I should be granted this one tiny wish in the hopes I don't start another one.

 

[tribdog]

I'm not tribdog, I'm someone who is just borrowing his computer for a couple of minutes and I'd like to point out a couple of facts.
1) When the member photo thread got out of control, he did go in and clean it up at no charge.
2) when Moonbear was crying that no one would give her anything for Christmas and all she really wanted was a set of Legos What did she find under her tree come Christmas morning with a label that said "Merry christmas moonbear. from a true admirer of all things mentorish, tribdog"?
3) When Astronuc needed that kidney transplant who flew to India and had his removed and fed exed to astronuc?
4) who risked discovery and possible death to describe the dangers of MAPP gas and frozen soda to the members of PF?
5) I could go on and on. Evo how's that no interest home loan working out for you? Have you forgotten who taught you how to ride a big boys bicycle, Hurkyl?

That's all I have to say, I'll let tribdog have his computer back now

 

[OAQfirst]

Now see, that's a problem. You have just let someone else use your computer. How can the staff here know that you'll maintain control if they should offer you a temp position?

 

[tribdog]

you are about three posts away from a virtual fat lip. OOH if i ever get the power to ban someone.

 

[russ_watters]

Just ask them to post a screenshot of their godly powers in action, such as the options to ban posters, delete posts, lock threads etc.

Wish granted!

Look how close you just came to being banned, tribdog. I had my mouse cursor hovering over the button (didn't show up in the screen cap). An accidental sneeze and you'd have been gone.

Plus as Hurkyl said, the powerful ancient knowledge that you would be exposed to would certainly drive you mad.

I'm willing to take that risk. I mean, seriously - who would even notice?

 

[Evo]

Wish granted!

Look how close you just came to being banned, tribdog. I had my mouse cursor hovering over the button (didn't show up in the screen cap). An accidental sneeze and you'd have been gone. I'm willing to take that risk. I mean, seriously - who would even notice?

At least you didn't let him see behind the curtain.

 

[Moonbear]

Now see, that's a problem. You have just let someone else use your computer. How can the staff here know that you'll maintain control if they should offer you a temp position?

Exactly!

Wish granted!

Look how close you just came to being banned, tribdog. I had my mouse cursor hovering over the button (didn't show up in the screen cap). An accidental sneeze and you'd have been gone. I'm willing to take that risk. I mean, seriously - who would even notice?

 

[Defennder]

Wish granted!

Look how close you just came to being banned, tribdog. I had my mouse cursor hovering over the button (didn't show up in the screen cap). An accidental sneeze and you'd have been gone. I'm willing to take that risk. I mean, seriously - who would even notice?

Interesting options you guys have there. Up till now I still don't anything how infractions work. Is there anywhere that explains it?

 

[Evo]

Interesting options you guys have there. Up till now I still don't anything how infractions work. Is there anywhere that explains it?

Nothing that explains what our options are, but there are explanations in the guidelines about how many points will get you banned and outright crackpot posts, spam, obscenity, etc... are automatic bans.

 

[hypatia]

I was fine, just fine...until the free kidney part. You know I almost choked to death on a oatmeal cookie?
I'm just glad it didn't come out my nose, that would of really hurt.

 

[tribdog]

If you ever need CPR, or just want to practice it a little let me know. I do know CPR something a mentor should be proficient in.

 

[lisab]

If you ever need CPR, or just want to practice it a little let me know. I do know CPR something a mentor should be proficient in.

No, not CPR. VCPR - Virtual CPR. Success rate - very, very low. Indistinguishable from zero, in fact.

 

[tribdog]

No, not CPR. VCPR - Virtual CPR. Success rate - very, very low. Indistinguishable from zero, in fact.

which appears to mimic my chances of getting to try on a mentor robe for once. What's that one saying? "What ever doesn't kill you can still make you feel really bad, maybe even depressed." I'm going to go take a walk and look at the stars and sigh a few times.

 

[Kurdt]

Greg could make tribdog his own medal. The "un-mentor" medal perhaps. Or just let you experience a banning first hand.

 

[muppet]

We keep you out for your own protection. We are the keepers of a thousand arcane secrets. And each one would drive you MAD! MAD![/size]

Here's a couple I've stumbled across.

• In her avatar, Moonbear is shooting JR.
• ZapperZ canceled Sheriff Lobo.
• Quantum mechanics is a lie propagated by the bourgeois academics to undermine dialectical materialism and repress the proletariat. Honestly.
• Murphy's law was revealed to mankind when Indiana Jones peeked in the ark of the covenant off-camera.
• We-live in a 42-dimensional universe, shaped like a http://www.baristanet.com/CurlyWurly.jpg , supported by four elephants on the back of a turtle. This turtle goes all the way down.

 

[Moonbear]

If you ever need CPR, or just want to practice it a little let me know. I do know CPR something a mentor should be proficient in.

Sorry, we already have berkeman. He's trained as an EMT. See, you didn't believe Hurkyl about all the vast knowledge that comes with being a mentor and thought we might have forgotten something. Rookie mistake.

 

[Lisa!]

I guess mentors are the 1s who're close to know all about the secret of PF, so they get killed by the Gods of forum and then are replaced with some software!

 

[Redbelly98]

Can I be a mentor for one day ...

Just make an avatar that contains the mentor badge as part of it! I'm sure you'd fool a lot of people.{Insert pic here}

https://www.physicsforums.com/images/misc/supermentor.gif edit: DO NOT DO THIS! See MIH's message below.

{ This whole thread }

 

[Math Is Hard]

Just make an avatar that contains the mentor badge as part of it! I'm sure you'd fool a lot of people.


{Insert pic here}

https://www.physicsforums.com/images/misc/supermentor.gif

Not recommended. Someone got in pretty big trouble for doing that once.

 

[OAQfirst]

Ah hah!

(iii) Only one person per account/username--accounts are not to be shared.

https://www.physicsforums.com/showthread.php?t=5374

Where's that fat lip, tribby?

 

[CRGreathouse]

Plus as Hurkyl said, the powerful ancient knowledge that you would be exposed to would certainly drive you mad.

Do the mad click on AdSense ads more or less, I wonder?