Is Love Always True or Sometimes a Facade?

[Lisa!]

For me love is the most mysterious word in the world.I want to know what's your definition of love!
When I was younger,I thought "I love you!" is the most beautiful sentence in the world and I thought it means "I'm going to step out of my selfishness and prefer another person's happiness to myself."and it means "I'll never hurt you purposely!"
Then I grow up and now I think this sentence is still beautiful but it also could be kind of warning.You know it means:
1.I love you till I don't get tired of you or meet a better person!
2.I love you because you can bring happiness into my life and if I can't make you happy,it's not important at all!
3.I love you but if you reject my love, I'll do everything to hurt you!(warning!)
Sometimes people love you so they try to keep you beside themselves forever.They do their best not to let you improve because you may leave them or not like them as much as before.And right now I think the only true love is mother's love!


You may think I'm too pessimistic but you know we have to be careful all the time.

 

[rachmaninoff]

There's no such thing.

 

[Bladibla]

There's no such thing.

Agreed.

Giving most credits of this comment to franz, 'sexual lust; would be more appropriate word.

 

[kaos]

I love curry and i don't think that has anything to do with sexual lust.

 

[*Kia*]

it means "I'm going to step out of my selfishness and prefer another person's happiness to myself."and it means "I'll never hurt you purposely!"

Exactly that, if the feeling is not mutaul then it is they that do not love you.
To be IN LOVE the feeling needs to be mutual (otherwise it is unrequited and/or can become an obsession)

the only true love is mother's love!

I beg to differ

 

[motai]

For me, love seems to be rather elusive, but I hope to someday find it.

I am basing everything off of theoretical knowledge of the concept, so if I go astray somewhere please correct me.

Since love is a human interaction between two people, there are not clear-and-set rules that govern the nature of it. Two can love paternally, platonically, physically (though that is more like lust that Bladibla mentioned), or many other numerous ways. The thing that love has in common to me is mutual understanding of the other's individual self.

The two people in the relationship gain strength from each other, loving each other for who they are, and not for any other external reasons such as money or status (for then it would not really be love at all). In this way, each person in the relationship feels respected and wanted, and can count on their partner whenever needed. Two becomes a manifestation of one, which is represented in the wedding vases of Native American pottery.

Naturally, one person's wishes has to be respected in order for anything to work out. This can lead to quandarys and odd situations. For instance, a woman's last act of love may be to sign the divorce papers with the man, if the man's wishes are to divorce her. It is this respect that seems to decide the strength (or lack thereof) of the love.

Unrequited love sucks, avoid it if you can. One-way love doesn't work either, unless you are of course married to yourself. Avoid situations where the other person doesn't respect you for who you are, these will seem to lead to hardship and pain in the end.

I have to admit that there is much, much more to it than this, and I'm sure that others on this forum who have more experience can explain it much better than I ever could. I just don't hope that I am lead horribly astray...

 

[wolram]

Motai
Unrequited love sucks, avoid it if you can. One-way love doesn't work either, unless you are of course married to yourself. Avoid situations where the other person doesn't respect you for who you are, these will seem to lead to hardship and pain in the end.

Hey, I am in love with loads of people, maybe cause i can't have them
Theres one or two or three or more on PF, but i know they don't respect me But i don't give a tinkers cuss, caus I am happy as i am

 

[brewnog]

Hey, I am in love with loads of people, maybe cause i can't have them
Theres one or two or three or more on PF, but i know they don't respect me

It's ok, we know who we are.

 

[wolram]

Kiss kiss, wana go fur a pint darlin.

 

[brewnog]

Kiss kiss, wana go fur a pint darlin.

Love to, but I'm off to the Leadmill, where everyone gets a bargain. 60p for a bottle. My liver is evil, and deserves to be punished.

x-x-x


http://www.hotrails.co.uk/images/venues/sheffield_leadmill.jpg

 

[Danger]

I love curry and i don't think that has anything to do with sexual lust.

Not for you, perhaps, but we all have our personal kinks.

 

[Evo]

Motai
Unrequited love sucks, avoid it if you can. One-way love doesn't work either, unless you are of course married to yourself. Avoid situations where the other person doesn't respect you for who you are, these will seem to lead to hardship and pain in the end.

Hey, I am in love with loads of people, maybe cause i can't have them
Theres one or two or three or more on PF, but i know they don't respect me But i don't give a tinkers cuss, caus I am happy as i am

I love you wolram.

 

[fourier jr]

For me love is the most mysterious word in the world.I want to know what's your definition of love!
When I was younger,I thought "I love you!" is the most beautiful sentence in the world and I thought it means "I'm going to step out of my selfishness and prefer another person's happiness to myself."and it means "I'll never hurt you purposely!"
Then I grow up and now I think this sentence is still beautiful but it also could be kind of warning.You know it means:
1.I love you till I don't get tired of you or meet a better person!
2.I love you because you can bring happiness into my life and if I can't make you happy,it's not important at all!
3.I love you but if you reject my love, I'll do everything to hurt you!(warning!)

i add:
4. "i want to become a better person & i need you to help me"
5. "i see a carbon copy of myself in you"

btw the best love song is obviously rod stewart's http://members.aol.com/hannuschka/lyrics/evryp_ly.htm#BM7

The morning sun when it's in your face really shows your age
But that don't worry me none in my eyes you're everything
I laughed at all of your jokes my love you didn't need to coax
Oh, Maggie I couldn't have tried any more
You lured me away from home, just to save you from being alone
You stole my soul and that's a pain I can do without

 

[Astronuc]

When I was younger, I thought "I love you!" is the most beautiful sentence in the world and I thought it means "I'm going to step out of my selfishness and prefer another person's happiness to myself."and it means "I'll never hurt you purposely!"

I still think, when said honestly and thoughtfully, it is the most beautiful sentence.

1.I love you till I don't get tired of you or meet a better person!
2.I love you because you can bring happiness into my life and if I can't make you happy,it's not important at all!
3.I love you but if you reject my love, I'll do everything to hurt you!(warning!)

Those are three examples of the misappropriation of the phrase - "I love you."

Sometimes people love you so they try to keep you beside themselves forever. They do their best not to let you improve because you may leave them or not like them as much as before.

That would not be love.

And right now I think the only true love is mother's love!

or a father's love for his children.

You may think I'm too pessimistic but you know we have to be careful all the time.

Not really, it sounds like someone who has recently had one or more negative experiences.

Love is unconditional and unselfish.

 

[ron damon]

If love doesn't exist, then I'm condemned to an incomplete existence, and that is something I could not bear.

 

[Evo]

If love doesn't exist, then I'm condemned to an incomplete existence, and that is something I could not bear.

Love is what you want it to be. It's a personal experience.

There are many forms of love. You are the only one that can decide what "love" is to you and which form is the most meaningful.

 

[The_Professional]

For instance, a woman's last act of love may be to sign the divorce papers with the man, if the man's wishes are to divorce her. It is this respect that seems to decide the strength (or lack thereof) of the love.

When a woman signs the divorce papers, and in relationships they usually initiate the divorce 90% of the time. It's not because she loves him.
It's always the opposite.

 

[Arctic Fox]

I've been through diamonds
I've been through minks
I've been through it all
Love stinks! Yeah, yeah!

 

[Lisa!]

Unrequited love sucks, avoid it if you can. One-way love doesn't work either, unless you are of course married to yourself. Avoid situations where the other person doesn't respect you for who you are, these will seem to lead to hardship and pain in the end.

I

first of all, welcome back!
It's really great when you fall in love with someone and you're sure you can never have him/her.because it's terrible if you can have him! because after you start a relationship with him,you'll get to know the person better and sometimes even you may hate him!and in most cases you'll get tired of him at least.And you know in some cases you even may lose all your freedom because of him!That's why I love impossible love but unfortunatelu I haven't exprienced yet except for celebrities!
But I'm telling you,it's quite a big disaster when someone falls in love with you whom you don't like at all esp. if the person would be so nice and respectful!I myself think I'm a criminal because of not loving him.You know you always think maybe he's the right person and you're making a terrible mistake by rejecting his love!

 

[The_Professional]

But I'm telling you,it's quite a big disaster when someone falls in love with you whom you don't like at all esp. if the person would be so nice and respectful!I myself think I'm a criminal because of not loving him.You know you always think maybe he's the right person and you're making a terrible mistake by rejecting his love!

What if it's the opposite. If instead, you're the one in love and the person doesn't seem to notice you. Would you like it any better? how would you get the person's attention?

 

[ron damon]

Love is what you want it to be. It's a personal experience.

There are many forms of love. You are the only one that can decide what "love" is to you and which form is the most meaningful.

I don't think you can "decide" on love any more than you can decide on having been born. And it is a tragedy, because I swear the control switch must have been scrambled when I was dropped on this lonely earth...

 

[Danger]

If love doesn't exist, then I'm condemned to an incomplete existence, and that is something I could not bear.

After the first 40 years or so, you start to get used to it.

!I myself think I'm a criminal because of not loving him.

It's okay, dear. I'll get over it.

 

[Evo]

I don't think you can "decide" on love any more than you can decide on having been born.

If you are talking about the "head over heels I think I'm going to die" love between a man and a woman (cough) usually, then I agree. But that type of "love" usually disappears after 3-6 months, then comes the more realistic form of love that only you can decide the meaning of.

 

[icvotria]

Bah humbug to love, I give up on it. For now at least...

 

[Arctic Fox]

How many of you people out there
Been hurt in some kind of love affair
And how many times do you swear that you'll never love again?

How many lonely, sleepless nights
How many lies, how many fights
And why would you want to put yourself through all that again?

"Love is pain," I hear you say
Love has a cruel and bitter way
Of paying you back for all the faith you ever had in your brain

How could it be that what you need the most
Can leave you feeling just like a ghost?
You never want to feel so sad and lost again

One day you could be looking
Through an old book in rainy weather
You see a picture of her smiling at you
When you were still together
You could be walking down the street
And who should you chance to meet
But that same old smile that you've been thinking of all day

You can turn the clock to zero, honey
I'll sell the stock, we'll spend all the money
We're starting up a brand new day

Turn the clock all the way back
I wonder if she'll take me back
I'm thinking in a brand new way

Turn the clock to zero, sister
You'll never know how much I missed her
Starting up a brand new day

Turn the clock to zero, boss
The river's wide, we'll swim across it
Started up a brand new day

It could happen to you - just like it happened to me
There's simply no immunity - there's no guarantee
I say love's such a force - if you find yourself in it
And sometimes no reflection is there

Baby wait a minute, wait a minute
Wait a minute, wait a minute
Wait a minute, wait a minute

Turn the clock to zero, honey
I'll sell the stock, we'll spend all the money
We're starting up a brand new day

Turn the clock to zero, Mac
I'm begging her to take me back
I'm thinking in a brand new way

Turn the clock to zero, boss
The river's wide, we'll swim across it
Started up a brand new day

Turn the clock to zero buddy
Don't want to be no fuddy duddy
Started up a brand new day

I'm the rhythm in your tune
I'm the sun and you're the moon
I'm a bat and you're the cave
You're the beach and I'm the wave
I’m the plow and you’re the land
You're the glove and I'm the hand
I'm the train and you're the station
I'm a flagpole to your nation - yeah

Stand up all you lovers in the world
Stand up and be counted every boy and every girl
Stand up all you lovers in the world
Starting up a brand new day

I'm the present to your future
You're the wound and I’m the suture
You're the magnet to my pole
I'm the devil in your soul
You're the pupil I'm the teacher
You're the church and I'm the preacher
You're the flower I'm the rain
You're the tunnel I'm the train

Stand up all you lovers in the world
Stand up and be counted every boy and every girl
Stand up all you lovers in the world
Starting up a brand new day

You're the crop to my rotation
You're the sum of my equation
I'm the answer to your question
If you follow my suggestion
We can turn this ship around
We'll go up instead of down
You're the pan and I'm the handle
You're the flame and I'm the candle

Stand up all you lovers in the world
Stand up and be counted every boy and every girl
Stand up all you lovers in the world
We're starting up a brand new day

 

[Lisa!]

What if it's the opposite. If instead, you're the one in love and the person doesn't seem to notice you. Would you like it any better? how would you get the person's attention?

Well,I said no experience like this yet!I had some experience about celebrities but for sure I didn't try to attract their attention. but I think I'm the kind of person who will give up very soon.I mean I will forget the person who doesn't care about my love."Love someone who loves you as well!"but anyway whenever I think someone loves me but I don't like him, I always try to imagine myself in his situation but it won't change my feelings.when we don't love someone ,we shouldn't pretend we do!

 

[Lisa!]

I still think, when said honestly and thoughtfully, it is the most beautiful sentence.

Of course it is!

That would not be love.

It's love but of course it's self-love!

or a father's love for his children.

Yes,esp. my father's love and yours.

Not really, it sounds like someone who has recently had one or more negative experiences.

Not only my experiences!But you know I notice people are so nice but when you reject them,some of them get to be your enemy!

I'll get over it!

I won't let you to get over it!
If someone could fall you in love,I'll give her a big prize!

 

[ron damon]

If you are talking about the "head over heels I think I'm going to die" love between a man and a woman (cough) usually, then I agree. But that type of "love" usually disappears after 3-6 months, then comes the more realistic form of love that only you can decide the meaning of.

That's like a crush. And I mean that soul you need by your side. Not a pretty face, a nice body, or great sex. Just that intimate part of your own self that resides in another body. It's been decided since before the beginning of time. Love is dimensionless.

 

[Evo]

That's like a crush. And I mean that soul you need by your side. Not a pretty face, a nice body, or great sex. Just that intimate part of your own self that resides in another body. It's been decided since before the beginning of time. Love is dimensionless.

Oh, I wouldn't know anything about that.

But I loved my turtle Roger and he ran away.

ROGER!

 

[Danger]

I won't let you to get over it!
If someone could fall you in love,I'll give her a big prize!

I wish I could.

Maybe that's the problem...

Thanks, Lisa!, but I think it's too late. Keep hoping, though.

But I loved my turtle Roger and he ran away.

ROGER!

Good grief, woman. That was what... like 40 years ago? I loved my pet chameleon, too, until he exploded trying to hide in a box of crayons. I got over it.

 

[Lisa!]

I wish I could.

Maybe that's the problem...

Thanks, Lisa!, but I think it's too late. Keep hoping, though.

Sorry but !

 

[ron damon]

Oh, I wouldn't know anything about that.

But I loved my turtle Roger and he ran away.

ROGER!

I know. I once had a cockatiel and... let's leave it at that

 

[Danger]

Sorry but !

Just an anatomy joke that I figured I should take out of play before Artman could get his hands on it.

 

[Evo]

I know. I once had a cockatiel and... let's leave it at that

I had a cockatiel once...

You're ripping my heart out!

 

[ron damon]

I had a cockatiel once...

You're ripping my heart out!

Yeah, those little creatures can be so sweet and endearing, and I had to give mine up. Now I'm extra sad

 

[Lisa!]

So you have a rival, Danger!

I had a cockatiel once...

and we had a Franzbear once...

How many of you people out there
Been hurt in some kind of love affair
And how many times do you swear that you'll never love again?

How many lonely, sleepless nights
How many lies, how many fights
And why would you want to put yourself through all that again?

"Love is pain," I hear you say
Love has a cruel and bitter way
Of paying you back for all the faith you ever had in your brain

How could it be that what you need the most
Can leave you feeling just like a ghost?
You never want to feel so sad and lost again

One day you could be looking
Through an old book in rainy weather
You see a picture of her smiling at you
When you were still together
You could be walking down the street
And who should you chance to meet
But that same old smile that you've been thinking of all day

You can turn the clock to zero, honey
I'll sell the stock, we'll spend all the money
We're starting up a brand new day

Turn the clock all the way back
I wonder if she'll take me back
I'm thinking in a brand new way

Turn the clock to zero, sister
You'll never know how much I missed her
Starting up a brand new day

Turn the clock to zero, boss
The river's wide, we'll swim across it
Started up a brand new day

It could happen to you - just like it happened to me
There's simply no immunity - there's no guarantee
I say love's such a force - if you find yourself in it
And sometimes no reflection is there

Baby wait a minute, wait a minute
Wait a minute, wait a minute
Wait a minute, wait a minute

Turn the clock to zero, honey
I'll sell the stock, we'll spend all the money
We're starting up a brand new day

Turn the clock to zero, Mac
I'm begging her to take me back
I'm thinking in a brand new way

Turn the clock to zero, boss
The river's wide, we'll swim across it
Started up a brand new day

Turn the clock to zero buddy
Don't want to be no fuddy duddy
Started up a brand new day

I'm the rhythm in your tune
I'm the sun and you're the moon
I'm a bat and you're the cave
You're the beach and I'm the wave
I’m the plow and you’re the land
You're the glove and I'm the hand
I'm the train and you're the station
I'm a flagpole to your nation - yeah

Stand up all you lovers in the world
Stand up and be counted every boy and every girl
Stand up all you lovers in the world
Starting up a brand new day

I'm the present to your future
You're the wound and I’m the suture
You're the magnet to my pole
I'm the devil in your soul
You're the pupil I'm the teacher
You're the church and I'm the preacher
You're the flower I'm the rain
You're the tunnel I'm the train

Stand up all you lovers in the world
Stand up and be counted every boy and every girl
Stand up all you lovers in the world
Starting up a brand new day

You're the crop to my rotation
You're the sum of my equation
I'm the answer to your question
If you follow my suggestion
We can turn this ship around
We'll go up instead of down
You're the pan and I'm the handle
You're the flame and I'm the candle

Stand up all you lovers in the world
Stand up and be counted every boy and every girl
Stand up all you lovers in the world
We're starting up a brand new day

The best time to say "hmm..."

 

[Moonbear]

And of course there's always Rhino Love.

 

[Danger]

So you have a rival, Danger!

Not a rival... just a fiendishly clever sniper. This was just a matter of burning the crops so he couldn't steal the grain.

 

[Smurf]

For me, love seems to be rather elusive, but I hope to someday find it.

Hmmmm.. I wonder why

I am basing everything off of theoretical knowledge of the concept, so if I go astray somewhere please correct me.

Ahhhh

 

[JamesU]

The best time to say "hmm..."

no, no ,No, No, NO! it is 1 'h' 3'm's and six periods. (danger don't bring up the kotex commercial again)

 

[yourdadonapogostick]

urbandictionary.com:
3. love
A terrible, horrible infectious disease of the mind, that is falsely portrayed as wonderful by most ignorant individuals. It weakens one, allowing them to be easily manipulated, and eventually leads to nothing but pain and suffering.

 

[Lisa!]

i add:
4. "i want to become a better person & i need you to help me"
5. "i see a carbon copy of myself in you"

That's right!

 

[kaos]

Not for you, perhaps, but we all have our personal kinks.

maybe with americans and their pies. But curries are a strech.

 

[Lisa!]

no, no ,No, No, NO! it is 1 'h' 3'm's and six periods. (danger don't bring up the kotex commercial again)

I have my own style!

 

[motai]

When a woman signs the divorce papers, and in relationships they usually initiate the divorce 90% of the time. It's not because she loves him.
It's always the opposite.

Ah, I was relaying personal experience. The particular case I described happened in my family, and while rare, the man did initiate the divorce. The woman knew that it wouldn't work out, and that it would hurt even more to cling to him if he wanted to leave her. Hence her last act of love was leaving him... a little paradoxical.

But I'm telling you,it's quite a big disaster when someone falls in love with you whom you don't like at all esp. if the person would be so nice and respectful!I myself think I'm a criminal because of not loving him.You know you always think maybe he's the right person and you're making a terrible mistake by rejecting his love!

That sounds more like lust than love, since love (for most people's definitions) tends to be mutual. If the guy you are speaking of is nice and respectful (i.e. not trying to hound you or anything) you may want to give him a chance before rejecting him outright; that is unless you already know this person already and know for sure that you cannot get along with him.

 

[brewnog]

no, no ,No, No, NO! it is 1 'h' 3'm's and six periods. (danger don't bring up the kotex commercial again)

I think we should stop using these pre-emptive strikes against Danger's little witticisms. If we carry on too much, he won't ever have anything to post.

On second thoughts, maybe we should carry on...[/size]

 

[JamesU]

it's debatable

 

[Danger]

I think we should stop using these pre-emptive strikes against Danger's little witticisms.

It's okay in this case; that would have been a rerun.

On second thoughts, maybe we should carry on...[/size]

 

[Lisa!]

That sounds more like lust than love, since love (for most people's definitions) tends to be mutual. If the guy you are speaking of is nice and respectful (i.e. not trying to hound you or anything) you may want to give him a chance before rejecting him outright; that is unless you already know this person already and know for sure that you cannot get along with him.

You're right.but you know sometimes you know someone and you know he's so nice and for sure you can get along well with him but maybe he's so different from your imaginary gf/bf or you think you don't have the same goals in you lives or you can't get your goals by accepting him.Sometimes you know evrything is ok but because you met another nice guy before him and since you love that guy,for sure you can't satisfy yourself to accept another one's love.
but you know there are some cases,you meet the person for the first time and you even don't talk to hm but he claims "I love you...".it's ok if you like some people in the first meeting and then because you feel you can be happy with her/him,you try to get know her/him better but it's really strange when you want to start a relationship or perhaps marry her/him right the second you meet that person.I think this means these kind of people're just attracted by another person's appearance and internal beauty and personality isn't important at all.It's lust not love!