There isn't one. Or rather, trying to think of it as a process that "changes the speed of the watch hands" is thinking of it backwards.
Here's a better way to think of it: the watch is traveling along some curve in spacetime--the usual name for that curve is "worldline". Along that curve, as far as the watch is concerned, *all* time-dependent processes go "at the same rate". (The usual way of expressing this in relativity is that "proper time" is an invariant along any given worldline, and the rate of all time-dependent processes along that worldline is determined by proper time along that worldline.) For example, if you were moving along with the watch, you would see it ticking away normally, and you would not be able to tell anything about your or the watch's state of motion just by watching its ticking.
Now consider two watches that travel along different worldlines in spacetime--that is, they are in different states of motion--but the worldlines begin and end at the same event (i.e., the watches start out co-located, then separate, then come back together again). In general, the "length" of the two worldlines between those two events--i.e., the amount of proper time elapsed along each worldline--will be different, simply as a matter of geometry: two different curves between the same pair of points can have different lengths. And since proper time along each worldline determines the rate of all time-dependent processes along that worldline, including the ticking of watches, we expect the two watches in this case to show different elapsed times, in general, when they come back together. Again, this is purely a matter of the geometry of spacetime: there's no mysterious "process" at work that makes the watches "go at different rates"; it's just ordinary proper time along different curves.
Now, *if* you happen to be following a particular curve in spacetime (say, the one being followed by one watch in the above example), the proper time along that curve will seem "normal" to you, and proper time along other curves will seem "dilated" because it's going at a different rate, simply because of the geometry of spacetime. (Strictly speaking, the curve you are following must be inertial, and spacetime must be flat, for the proper time along all other curves between the same two points to seem dilated compared to yours.) So "time dilation" is really a side effect of spacetime geometry; it's not something separate that has to have a separate cause.