let me be more rpecise. calculus on, manifolds is not differential geometry but is the language in which differential geometry is discussed.
since most moidern books on differential geometry do not wish toa ssume he reader ahs studied calculus on manifolds, they tend to begin with a preliminary chapter on differential manifolds so mthe reader will understand the geometry when they get to it.
e.g. spivak has an entrie first volume just on differnetial manifolds and starts the geometry in volume 2. noel j hicks has a one short chapter on differential manifolds and starts the geometry subtly in chapter 2. it is hard to notice but if you read carefully and think about it, his definition of covariant derivative of a vector field wrt another one, uses the existence of a standard basis for the tangent bundle of R^n, hence they define a metric in which they are unit vectors.
he does not mention it anywhere but there it is.
in the same way some books may not assume we know any topology or any set theory or linear algebra, and begin with preparatory chapters on those topics, but they are still not differential geometry.
so the chapters on calculus on manifolds, tangent bundles, forms, etc... in books on diff geom are really prerequisites for diff geom, which they think the reader does not have.
to see this more clearly, do not ask why books on diff geom contain treatents of calc on manifodls, but why books not on diff geom also have them. i.e. if this topic appears also in other books on other subjects then it is a common prereq not a part of diff geom rpoper.
e.g. the book by guillimen and pollack on diff top also has a thorough treatment of calc on diff manifolds, as does spivak's little book calculus on manifolds,
in bott - tu e.g. on diff forms in alg top, there does occur a use of metrics but diff geom is merely used to prove a theorem in topology. so the matter is further complicated since diff geom is also helpful in proving facts that in the end do not depend on the metric.
in the same way a metric on R^n can be used to prove facts that are purely topological.
but bott - tu make it clear what they are doing by saying: "the proof of this theorem will use a little diff geom" and they promptly introduce a metric, which after the proof they promptly throw out again.
milnors beautiful book on morse theory combines the two topics and shows how to use diff geom techniques to prove more subtle things about topology. e.g spaces which admit certain types of metrics have strong restrictions on their homotopy groups.
am i making it clear what the difference is? if there is no metric or curvature, or covariant derivative, or connexion, then by definition there is no diff geom.
