OK, so I'm beginning to get it now. Work equals force times distance. Force equals mass times acceleration, and acceleration equals velocity per second. Since velocity is a vector, that means that when you multiply it by a bunch of other numbers, it's still a vector.
That still doesn't answer my question about the usefulness of work. Also, speed refers to the magnitude of the velocity vector, right? So why don't we have words that refer to the magnitude of the acceleration vector, the force vector, and the work vector?
Also, isn't it terribly counterintuitive that hitting someone with a ball will exert a negative force on them? The ball starts decelerating as soon as it leaves your hand, right?
This is going off topic a little, but maybe the fundamental problem isn't the usefulness or integrity of these terms, but rather the very human tendency to borrow words from the common parlance to describe something precise and scientific. For instance, according to the scientific definition of "berry", blueberries, raspberries, blackberris, and strawberries are not "berries", while tomatos, avocados, eggplants, and chili peppers are. Makes you wonder why they didn't just come up with a new word. I think it's because making up new words like "blorf" makes you sound silly.
To Cyrus: I read about work in my math textbook, so I've got a good reason to believe what I said about work. If you want to criticize me for asking newbie physics questions in this forum full of geniuses, that's a far more valid criticism :-). Hope I'm not bothering you guys too much.