Collection of Lame Jokes

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The discussion revolves around sharing and enjoying "lame" jokes, with participants contributing various puns and one-liners. Jokes include classic setups like "A duck walks into a pharmacy..." and "Why did the chicken cross the road?" along with playful wordplay, such as "What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick." The humor is characterized by its groan-inducing quality, with many jokes eliciting laughter despite their simplicity. Participants also engage in light banter about the nature of humor, with some jokes being deemed too funny to qualify as "lame." The thread highlights a shared enjoyment of corny humor and the camaraderie that comes from exchanging jokes, creating a lighthearted atmosphere.
  • #8,881
Ibix said:
Why do Marxists only drink herbal tea? Because proper tea is theft.

Edit: Apparently the quote is from Proudhon, and Marx initially agreed but later criticised the sentiment as self-refuting. But "Marxists" is snappier than "devotees of Proudhon".
Monty Proudhon? ( I'll see myself out).
 
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  • #8,882
Ibix said:
Why do Marxists only drink herbal tea? Because proper tea is theft.

Edit: Apparently the quote is from Proudhon, and Marx initially agreed but later criticised the sentiment as self-refuting. But "Marxists" is snappier than "devotees of Proudhon".
Well, if you look at the circumstances it is harvested and by whom ..., well, I think it is.
 
  • #8,883
davenn said:
Have you read the book, "Life Insurance for Dummies", by Justin Case ?
"For Dummies" and "Justin Case" are trademarks.
 
  • #8,884
fresh_42 said:
Well, if you look at the circumstances it is harvested and by whom ..., well, I think it is.
I remember someone who pronounced 'Hume' as ' whom'. Confusing lectures. In addition to ' So crates' instead of Socrates.
 
  • #8,885
1610150469047.png
 
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  • #8,886
gmax137 said:
How about "Yellow River," by I. P. Freely?
Alas, he abandoned me some decades past. :cry:
 
  • #8,887
WWGD said:
I remember someone who pronounced 'Hume' as ' whom'. Confusing lectures. In addition to ' So crates' instead of Socrates.
As long as you don't pronounce Sosogenes as "sausage knees". Or "so-so jeans".
 
  • #8,888
Paramedic: "Buddy, you're lucky to be alive. Your car's a write-off."
Suit, lying in his own blood: "Oh god no. My BMW..."
Paramedic: "Easy buddy. That's the least of your problems. Your arm's off."
Suit, lying in his own blood: "Oh god no. My Rolex..."
 
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  • #8,889
Halc said:
On similar lines: What did Spock find in the Enterprise head?
The captain's log
Is that what the future will being, every minute detail of daily life has to be entered and recorded.
Captain: Captain's log, stardate 41153.7
 
  • #8,890
256bits said:
Is that what the future will being, every minute detail of daily life has to be entered and recorded.
Yes, on the planet Bethselamin
 
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  • #8,891
All on her own, my hen has learned to count. Someday she'll be a good mathemachicken.
 
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  • #8,892
Does she use a cluckulater?
 
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  • #8,893
Borg said:
Does she use a cluckulater?
That was my suspicion, too. And I guess the device can be found on the other side of the road.
 
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  • #8,894
Would be great if she made the Dean's rooster.
Egg her on!
 
  • #8,895
Screenshot from 2021-01-10 18-32-33.png


TEXT: do you think I will forgive you for this?
 
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  • #8,896
_nc_ohc=huVZpVggmzwAX_hOE_A&_nc_ht=scontent-ham3-1.jpg
 
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  • #8,897
Looks like gravitational attraction. I hope the plane didn't get flung out of orbit.
 
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  • #8,898
to old for rock and roll band.jpg
 
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  • #8,899
After considerable thought,
I've decided that my New Year's resolution will be:
1080P
 
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Likes WWGD, DrClaude, Klystron and 2 others
  • #8,901
wrobel said:
that's sad little bit
maybe ?
but it completely reminds me of the Rolling Stones :wink: :smile:
 
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  • #8,902
davenn said:
maybe ?
but it completely reminds me of the Rolling Stones :wink: :smile:
... and Tina Turner! And the Boss isn't far away either. And Lemmy quasi died on stage.
 
  • #8,903
davenn said:
maybe ?
but it completely reminds me of the Rolling Stones :wink: :smile:
It sure does. And speaking of the Rolling Stones, did you hear about the crazy guy who jumped on stage at one of their concerts and tried to kill both Mick Jagger and Keith Richards with a frozen chicken?

Turns out he wasn't crazy at all, he was trying to test his hypothesis that you could kill two stones with one bird.
 
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  • #8,904
fresh_42 said:
and Tina Turner!
o yes and Tina Turner from my youth too and Scorpions and Metallica :)
 
  • #8,905
Screen Shot 2021-01-12 at 8.43.24 AM.png
 
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  • #8,906
2021 7 day free trial.jpg
 
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  • #8,908
Looks like she keeps her upper eyelids just below the top of her pupils.
 
  • #8,909
GenX-ers: Lidding their eyes and 'meh'ing in fits of ennui before Millennials made it cool.
 
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  • #8,910
jack action said:

BillTre said:
Looks like she keeps her upper eyelids just below the top of her pupils.

she looks totally stoned
 

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