Collection of Lame Jokes

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BillTre
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Screen Shot 2020-05-17 at 9.24.08 AM.png
 
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  • #7,452
WWGD
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You have nothing to lose but your chinas!
Beware the punishment of dog!
 
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  • #7,454
etotheipi
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  • #7,456
jack action
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Her: Undress me with your words :oldlove:

Him: A spider just crawled in your sweater.
 
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  • #7,457
jack action
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nc_ohc=QOmo0-71v_EAX8Bd0Wg&_nc_ht=scontent.fymq2-1.jpg


A bacon salad
 
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  • #7,458
jack action
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I was in line at the supermarket when the guy in front of me farted. I stared at him, he turned around and said, «If you heard that, you are not keeping your distance and if you smelled it, your mask is not helping you at all!»
 
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  • #7,459
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  • #7,460
WWGD
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My gun has such a strange work ethic: It only works after it's fired.
 
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My gun has such a stange work ethic: It only works after it's fired.
Isn't it the other way around? It gets fired if it works. Some guns fire when they're laid off.
 
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  • #7,463
BillTre
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Screen Shot 2020-05-19 at 4.14.31 PM.png
 
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  • #7,464
BillTre
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  • #7,465
BillTre
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  • #7,466
jack action
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At a job interview:

- What would you say is your greatest weakness?
- Honesty.
- Well, I don't think honesty is a bad thing!
- Well, I don't care about what you think.
 
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  • #7,467
BillTre
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Screen Shot 2020-05-21 at 8.11.47 AM.png
 
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dt200112.jpg
 
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  • #7,469
jtbell
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When that meteor hit the Yucatán peninsula 66 million years ago...

it made a Tyrannosaurus wreck.
 
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dt191231.gif
 
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  • #7,471
WWGD
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Cool cat teaching arithmetic
 

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  • #7,472
WWGD
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Jobs for unemployed bartenders
 

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  • #7,473
256bits
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Before he became Emperer, Julius once worked as a policeman.
But he wasn't very good at that, so he became a politician.

One example:
A female suspect would be chased, and they would call out,
"Juilius, seize her!"
he would just turn around, and say,
"Yes, You called."
 
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dNGkFv8T8yehDR4Bdv6LylZ0Gqg&_nc_ht=scontent-dus1-1.png
 
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  • #7,475
WWGD
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