Collection of Lame Jokes

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Discussion Overview

The thread centers around sharing and enjoying lame jokes, with participants contributing various humorous quips and puns. The discussion explores the nature of humor, particularly focusing on jokes that are intentionally corny or groan-inducing.

Discussion Character

  • Exploratory
  • Debate/contested
  • Conceptual clarification

Main Points Raised

  • Some participants share their favorite lame jokes, such as the classic "Why did the chicken cross the road?" and variations on animal-related humor.
  • Others express differing opinions on the quality of certain jokes, with some finding them hilarious while others consider them unfunny or "lame." For example, one participant finds a specific horse joke funny, while another insists it doesn't qualify as lame.
  • A few jokes incorporate wordplay and puns, such as the "frayed knot" joke and the "super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis" joke, which elicit mixed reactions.
  • There are discussions about surreal humor, with some participants questioning the nature of certain jokes and their classification as humor, such as the "fish" response to a lightbulb question.
  • Participants also engage in playful banter about the quality of jokes and the nature of humor itself, with some joking about the reactions to their contributions.

Areas of Agreement / Disagreement

There is no clear consensus on what constitutes a "lame" joke, as participants express a range of opinions on the humor shared. Some jokes are appreciated by certain individuals while others find them lacking, indicating a diversity of taste in humor.

Contextual Notes

Some jokes rely on specific cultural references or wordplay that may not be universally understood, leading to varied interpretations among participants.

  • #901
"This is Concordean 502, ready to drop payload."
"You have a go to drop the Tsar Bomba 4.0."
The massive bomb drops to the ground. It explodes in a 200 megaton fireball that engulfs the 55th TaeKwanDoDo Division. My bird zips away.
I put on sunglasses and say "Oooh! Shiny! F!r3w0rxx0rz!"
 
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  • #902
nismaratwork said:
Ahhh.. what did we do before photoshop? :biggrin:
Humanity told stories about tall beanstalks, giants, and The Time Machine by H. G. Wells.
 
  • #903
FtlIsAwesome said:
Humanity told stories about tall beanstalks, giants, and The Time Machine by H. G. Wells.

Hmmm... not too bad.

Still, I think the birds would be better if they ARE the projectiles. They circulate around your jetstream, and when need arises they go into a ballistic trajectory and the kinetic energy alone is the bomb.
 
  • #904
nismaratwork said:
Still, I think the birds would be better if they ARE the projectiles. They circulate around your jetstream, and when need arises they go into a ballistic trajectory and the kinetic energy alone is the bomb.
Are current supersonic aircraft good as kinetic weapons?

And to stay on-topic I should put a lame joke here...

Death by dihydrogen monoxide can be one of the worst ways to die.
 
  • #905
FtlIsAwesome said:
Are current supersonic aircraft good as kinetic weapons?

And to stay on-topic I should put a lame joke here...

Death by dihydrogen monoxide can be one of the worst ways to die.

Oooh... OUCH...

As to the aircraft... no, but then... this is a different planet, right? Maybe there's a reason to avoid nuclear weapons, or conventional explosives...

Still... if you look at 9.11... they do work as kinetic weapons, and that's not supersonic.


Back to jokes: "Cricket: "A game invented by religious fundamentalists to explain the idea of eternal hell to non-Chrisitan indigenous people of the former British Empire." (Joe O'Connor) " *from The Devil's Dictionary*
 
  • #906
A rare and confusing event for the locals, snow fell on San Francisco this week. Emergency rooms were deludged with cases of nasal-cavity frost bite.
 
  • #907
Ivan Seeking said:
A rare and confusing event for the locals, snow fell on San Francisco this week. Emergency rooms were deludged with cases of nasal-cavity frost bite.

:smile:

I'm laughing, but truly, my nose just got a bit stuffy thinking about it.
 
  • #908
Ivan Seeking said:
A rare and confusing event for the locals, snow fell on San Francisco this week. Emergency rooms were deludged with cases of nasal-cavity frost bite.

I don't get it.
 
  • #909
Lancelot59 said:
I don't get it.

Think... rails.
 
  • #910
nismaratwork said:
Think... rails.

I still don't get it.
 
  • #911
Lancelot59 said:
I still don't get it.

Do you have a 1 dollar bill?
 
  • #912
FtlIsAwesome said:
>Ahem<
Any Joke particle can simultaneously occupy the quantum superposition of Funny and Lame, therefore it can have the quality of Funny, but the quality of Lame is all that influences its standing here.

Moose Action at a Distance?
 
  • #913
14t3jtc.jpg
 
  • #914
Borek said:
Do you have a 1 dollar bill?

Oh...they were doing cocaine?
 
  • #915
Lancelot59 said:
Oh...they were doing cocaine?

Rails... of cocaine. Yeah, that was the clue. I don't know, having never used cocaine I'm only really familiar with the addict terminology.

cocaine127.jpg
 
  • #916
nismaratwork said:
Rails... of cocaine. Yeah, that was the clue. I don't know, having never used cocaine I'm only really familiar with the addict terminology.

cocaine127.jpg

Right...I still don't get it. Was it because they all thought the snow was cocaine?
[PLAIN]http://verydemotivational.files.wordpress.com/2010/09/demotivational-posters-snorting-coke.jpg
 
Last edited by a moderator:
  • #917
Lancelot59 said:
Right...I still don't get it. Was it because they all thought the snow was cocaine?

That was the idea. :biggrin: San Francisco has a reputation as a mecca for hyper-liberals [in the 1960's and 70's it was hippies] and drug users.

Also, "snow" is an old street name for cocaine.
 
  • #918
Lancelot59 said:
[PLAIN]http://verydemotivational.files.wordpress.com/2010/09/demotivational-posters-snorting-coke.jpg[/QUOTE]

Is that Joe Charboneau? No, wait, Charboneau used to be able to drink beer through his nose.

He was rookie of the year for the Indians when the Indians were in the midst of a 30 year losing streak and lots of baseball fans saw him as our hope for the future - until he started dying his hair odd colors, opening beer bottles with his eye socket, drinking beer through his nose, and doing his own dental work with a pair of pliers and a bottle of Jack Daniels.

He got sent back to the minors pretty early in his second season and was playing semi-pro ball a couple years after that. Being a Cleveland sports fan just kind of sucks like that.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
  • #919
Ivan Seeking said:
That was the idea. :biggrin: San Francisco has a reputation as a mecca for hyper-liberals [in the 1960's and 70's it was hippies] and drug users.

Also, "snow" is an old street name for cocaine.

"Pure as the driven snow"... Heh.

What gets me is the majority of money having cocaine residue on it! I realize if someone is snorting cocaine, they're not really concerned about health (given what cocaine is, and what it's cut with), but... money is pretty dirty stuff; why use rolled money to snort? I never did understand that...

...Then again the strongest thing I've used in my life is cannabis, and that was many many many moons ago.


@"snorting Coke" Funny pic, but you know that kid's nose must have been on FIRE for a while! :smile:
 
  • #920
DevilsAvocado said:
Moose Action at a Distance?
Yës æït ïs.
 
  • #921
FtlIsAwesome said:
Yës æït ïs.

Oköy thäught sö.


(...this is getting real lame, isn’t it...? :biggrin:)
 
  • #922
DevilsAvocado said:
(...this is getting real lame, isn’t it...? :biggrin:)
Søry, no Inglesh I only knø Skandïhnävian.


I wander what wold happen ïf yøø ghot æ møøse to snört köka-kölah... wäït don't dou thhat the møøse wîll gæt verie angrie, he wëëll pröhb'blie trâmple yøø...
 
  • #923
Øüwch.
 
  • #924
nismaratwork said:
What gets me is the majority of money having cocaine residue on it! I realize if someone is snorting cocaine, they're not really concerned about health (given what cocaine is, and what it's cut with), but... money is pretty dirty stuff; why use rolled money to snort? I never did understand that...

Note that "deluged" only has one d in it. :rolleyes: Sometimes I think I have alien finger syndrome.

It bothers me a lot more that my bills have all been up someone's nose!
 
  • #925
Ivan Seeking said:
It bothers me a lot more that my bills have all been up someone's nose!
That makes me feel like I need to sneeze. :bugeye:
 
  • #926
FtlIsAwesome said:
I wander what wold happen ïf yøø ghot æ møøse to snört köka-kölah... wäït don't dou thhat the møøse wîll gæt verie angrie, he wëëll pröhb'blie trâmple yøø...

Nö nö, taht is nöt ä pröblem. Mööse is ä bäd äss jönky änd höö cän händle it. Dön’t læt him drivæ thöugh, thät næver ænds wäll, änd pölice is væry thööugh whæn it cömes too mööse spæeding... thæy cän smæll a snörting möös milæs äheaæd...

x2p3wy.jpg


Thæ cöps wäs öut yæstærdäy äss wæll...

33p4xf4.png
 
  • #927
Ivan Seeking said:
It bothers me a lot more that my bills have all been up someone's nose!

Øüwch.
 
  • #928
Ivan Seeking said:
Note that "deluged" only has one d in it. :rolleyes: Sometimes I think I have alien finger syndrome.

It bothers me a lot more that my bills have all been up someone's nose!

Ugh, right? That's why I always wear 18 layers of latex gloves, and bathe in boiling water and acetone. :wink:
 
  • #929
DevilsAvocado said:
Øüwch.
Hey you stole my post! Thief!

:-p
 
  • #930
DevilsAvocado said:
Nö nö, taht is nöt ä pröblem. Mööse is ä bäd äss jönky änd höö cän händle it. Dön’t læt him drivæ thöugh, thät næver ænds wäll, änd pölice is væry thööugh whæn it cömes too mööse spæeding... thæy cän smæll a snörting möös milæs äheaæd...

x2p3wy.jpg


Thæ cöps wäs öut yæstærdäy äss wæll...

33p4xf4.png

HA! :smile: :smile: :smile:
 

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