Collection of Lame Jokes

[HeLiXe]

- Neutrino.
- Knock-knock!
- Who's there?

lololll nice one!

 

[Lancelot59]

Did CERN get around to running another test?

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Did CERN get around to running another test?

The results are in but they haven't run the tests yet.

 

[Borg]

The results are in but they haven't run the tests yet.

 

[Drakkith]

The results are in but they haven't run the tests yet.

Buahaha! Good one Ivan!

 

[FtlIsAwesome]

The results are in but they haven't run the tests yet.

 

[diazona]

http://verydemotivational.memebase.com/2011/10/07/demotivational-posters-the-average-person/

 

[Lancelot59]

The results are in but they haven't run the tests yet.

HA! I got it...

 

[OmCheeto]

I would like to thank the last 8 posters for explaining LisaB's joke to me...

Ok! I get it now!

 

[Lancelot59]

I would like to thank the last 8 posters for explaining LisaB's joke to me...

Ok! I get it now!

You're welcome. Happy to help!

 

[FlexGunship]

The results are in but they haven't run the tests yet.

This... this is clever.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

This... this is clever.

You know what they say about neutrino humor: It's all in the timing.

 

[QuarkCharmer]

What's purple and commutes?
An abelian grape.

What is the contour integral around Western Europe?
Zero, because all the Poles are in Eastern Europe

 

[Lancelot59]

You know what they say about neutrino humor: It's all in the timing.

HA! Punny...

 

[jtbell]

What is the contour integral around Western Europe?
Zero, because all the Poles are in Eastern Europe

Q: Why was Cauchy's dog unpopular in Poland?
A: It left a residue at every Pole.

 

[jtbell]

The animals at the zoo have been gossiping about the latest arrival: "Can you believe what the new gnu knew?!"

 

[Isaacsname]

How does a dairy cow go when it sneaks off the farm ?

Pasturize

 

[QuarkCharmer]

What do neutrinos wear when they ride horses?

Spoiler

massless chaps

 

[DaveC426913]

What do neutrinos wear when they ride horses?

Spoiler

massless chaps

Oh.

I didn't get it at first, so I Googled the phrase.

I got it. I got retinal scarring is what I got.

Thank you QuarkCharmer for that.

 

[QuarkCharmer]

Oh.

I didn't get it at first, so I Googled the phrase.

I got it. I got retinal scarring is what I got.

Thank you QuarkCharmer for that.

I didn't think that anyone would have to google that one!

 

[maggiemaeu]

why do we drive on the parkway and park on a driveway?
i think that one technically belongs to the stupidest questions.

 

[Isaacsname]

What's the difference between an accordian and an onion ?

Nobody's going to cry if you cut an accordian into tiny pieces.

 

[DaveC426913]

I didn't think that anyone would have to google that one!

I know what they are, I just didn't make the connection. Obvious in retrospect.

 

[lisab]

What do neutrinos wear when they ride horses?

Spoiler

massless chaps

...hilarious...!

 

[Lisa!]

PS: Is there any lame pics thread? Anyway if I'm ruining this thread with these pics, please let me know!​

 

[Isaacsname]

A neutrino was arrested for exceeding the speed limit recently, but they had to let it go...

...

 

[IMP]

I earn a seven-figure salary. Unfortunately, there are decimal points involved.

 

[FtlIsAwesome]

Knock-knock.
Who's there?
Doctor.
Doctor who?
Just "The Doctor".


--------


zombie kitteh sez: i can has brains?

 

[HeLiXe]

I saw this on a professor's office door today and probably laughed more than most would
http://halloween.tipjunkie.com/wp-content/halloween-thumbs/if-the-broom-fits-ride-it-printable.jpg

 

[jtbell]

With the new iPhone out, we can expect Siri to contribute a lot of lame jokes. Here are a couple that I've read about recently:

Q: Can you tell me a bad joke?

Siri: Two iPhones walk into a bar ... I forget the rest.

-----

Q: How much wood can a woodchuck chuck?

Siri: 42 cords.

-----

Q: Who's on first?

Siri: That's right.