Collection of Lame Jokes

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The discussion revolves around sharing and enjoying "lame" jokes, with participants contributing various puns and one-liners. Jokes include classic setups like "A duck walks into a pharmacy..." and "Why did the chicken cross the road?" along with playful wordplay, such as "What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick." The humor is characterized by its groan-inducing quality, with many jokes eliciting laughter despite their simplicity. Participants also engage in light banter about the nature of humor, with some jokes being deemed too funny to qualify as "lame." The thread highlights a shared enjoyment of corny humor and the camaraderie that comes from exchanging jokes, creating a lighthearted atmosphere.
  • #12,991
Borg said:
Font style does matter.

View attachment 304177
Fonts matter!
 
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  • #12,992
pinball1970 said:
Do you have different experience? If you have a positive experience then please share.
Well, there's this one person I know who uses it sometimes, and by my humble judgement he's rather mature, intelligent, and generally funny. Also rather quite handsome. And good with children. And humble, too. Hates explaining his jokes, though.
 
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  • #12,993
Bandersnatch said:
Well, there's this one person I know who uses it sometimes, and by my humble judgement he's rather mature, intelligent, and generally funny. Also rather quite handsome. And good with children. And humble, too. Hates explaining his jokes, though.
QED
 
  • #12,994
Bandersnatch said:
Well, there's this one person I know who uses it sometimes, and by my humble judgement he's rather mature, intelligent, and generally funny. Also rather quite handsome. And good with children. And humble, too. Hates explaining his jokes, though.

QEE

A quick reminder:
Greg Bernhardt said:
When posting a new topic do not use the CAPS lock (all-CAPS), bold, oversized, non-standard, or brightly colored fonts, or any combination thereof.
 
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  • #12,995
fresh_42 said:
QEE

A quick reminder:
Apologies I was trying to be pithy.

Quod erat demonstradum.
 
  • #12,996
fresh_42 said:
QEE

A quick reminder:
QEE?
 
  • #12,997
pinball1970 said:
QEE?
Quod erat expectandum.


1657820980270.png

(lIchopbe'chugh bommey DIlIjbe'mo' - Changing fonts is not funny.)
 
Last edited:
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  • #12,998
I just read another page about disliked fonts (linked to from the first font page I posted above), and I laughed when I read this quote about the font "Curlz MT":

"Curlz MT is not a font; it's a cry for help."

:)

From: The 7 worst fonts
https://lmnop.blogs.com/lauren/2006/10/americas_most_f.html
 
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  • #12,999
fresh_42 said:
Quod erat expectandum.


View attachment 304178

( lIchopbe'chugh bommey DIlIjbe'mo' - Changing fonts is not funny.)
Numbers? This is what happens when you stick a pithy Latin phrase in front of a mathematician.
I was going for the, Quidquid latine dictum, altum videtur concept.
 
  • #13,000
DennisN said:
I just read another page about disliked fonts (linked to from the first font page I posted above), and I laughed when I read this quote about the font "Curlz MT":

"Curlz MT is not a font; it's a cry for help."

:)

From: The 7 worst fonts
https://lmnop.blogs.com/lauren/2006/10/americas_most_f.html
America's most fronted. Probably the best named website after? I don't know. I'm in awe.
Please take note of enemy number one. @Bandersnatch
 
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  • #13,001
pinball1970 said:
Numbers? This is what happens when you stick a pithy Latin phrase in front of a mathematician.
I was going for the, Quidquid latine dictum, altum videtur concept.
That's why I said changing fonts is not funny on Klingon!
 
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  • #13,002
fresh_42 said:
That's why I said changing fonts is not funny on Klingon!
Oh dash it!
How many times have I been made to look like an idiot because of Klingon?
I feel like a fool. Again.
 
  • #13,003
For the record, I personally don't dislike those fonts as much as they are described on the pages I posted. I just think some quotes are funny. :smile:
 
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  • #13,004
pinball1970 said:
Oh dash it!
How many times have I been made to look like an idiot because of Klingon?
I feel like a fool. Again.
Here is the solution:
https://www.translator.eu/

Ok, I also installed Klingon fonts once.
 
  • #13,005
Ok, I also installed Klingon fonts once.
[/QUOTE]
Your English is better than my German and my Hungarian is a lot worse than I thought it was.
My Klingon? I would rather move on from that.
 
  • #13,006
The story I read about Klingon is that the language was created for Star Trek VI, consistent with bits and pieces that had been spoken before. Just for laughs, the guy who created it gave it no verb "to be", wrote a dictionary, and went to see Nick Meyer, the director. Star Trek VI, you may recall, is the one with the Klingons who love Shakespeare - so the first thing Meyer asks is "how do you say 'to be, or not to be' In Klingon?"
 
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  • #13,007
_nc_ohc=5kvelrv__qAAX_mRMuZ&_nc_ht=scontent-dus1-1.jpg
 
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  • #13,008
She might not be so happy if she knew what was going on below deck.

machine_learning_joke.jpg
 
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  • #13,009

Accordion to a scientific study released by the Department of Psychology at the University of British Columbia,​

most people will not immediately notice if one of the words in a sentence has been replaced with a musical instrument until they've read more than three quarters of the way through it.
 
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  • #13,010
Jodo said:
most people will not immediately notice if one of the words in a sentence has been replaced with a musical instrument until they've read more than three quarters of the way through it.
When I listen, I do not immediately notice the beeps that hide the emphasis, or most interesting parts of speech.
But if I said that you had violin well get that job done; would you notice.
 
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  • #13,011
FB_IMG_16578644125882268.jpg
 
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  • #13,012
She's such an overachiever.jpg
 
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  • #13,013
When I was a kid, I thought a lot of adults were pretty stupid. Now I'm an adult myself and I have to say: I was right!
 
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  • #13,014
Reggie Jackson driving against traffic is stopped by a cop.

Cop:" Don't you know this is a one-way street?"
Reggie: " I'm only going one way!".
 
  • #13,015
fresh_42 said:
When I was a kid, I thought a lot of adults were pretty stupid. Now I'm an adult myself and I have to say: I was right!
Yeah but Fresh come on man.
How many people have that thing? Or have studied? To that level?
It is your job to drag us kicking and screaming through this.

I will have some sort of a grip before I die. Otherwise, what's the point?
 
  • #13,016
pinball1970 said:
Yeah but Fresh come on man.
How many people have that thing? Or have studied? To that level?
It is your job to drag us kicking and screaming through this.

I will have some sort of a grip before I die. Otherwise, what's the point?
Lost in translation. The German word was "doof" which is not really "stupid" and describes it in a more childish way. It is also self-criticism rather than pointing at others.
 
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  • #13,017
pinball1970 said:
I will have some sort of a grip before I die. Otherwise, what's the point?
I'm not sure what this means.

a firm hold; a tight grasp or clasp
an effective form of control over something
a part or attachment by which something is held in the hand

I think "grip" also means influenza in German

either way, I'm lost in translation!
 
  • #13,018
gmax137 said:
I'm not sure what this means.

a firm hold; a tight grasp or clasp
an effective form of control over something
a part or attachment by which something is held in the hand
In the vernacular in the U.S. and, apparently, in the U.K., "get a grip" means to gain control of one's mind -- not taking wildly irrational actions and not having wildly irrational thoughts.

Kind of a "snap out of it and start dealing with the situation at hand".
 
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  • #13,020
Looks like Rory tried so hard for another birdie, he became one himself!

3818DE59-FD9A-49AB-8B1D-922D766E3DC2.jpeg
 

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