Collection of Lame Jokes

  • Thread starter Thread starter quddusaliquddus
  • Start date Start date
  • Tags Tags
    Jokes
Click For Summary
The discussion revolves around sharing and enjoying "lame" jokes, with participants contributing various puns and one-liners. Jokes include classic setups like "A duck walks into a pharmacy..." and "Why did the chicken cross the road?" along with playful wordplay, such as "What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick." The humor is characterized by its groan-inducing quality, with many jokes eliciting laughter despite their simplicity. Participants also engage in light banter about the nature of humor, with some jokes being deemed too funny to qualify as "lame." The thread highlights a shared enjoyment of corny humor and the camaraderie that comes from exchanging jokes, creating a lighthearted atmosphere.
  • #12,991
Borg said:
Font style does matter.

View attachment 304177
Fonts matter!
 
Physics news on Phys.org
  • #12,992
pinball1970 said:
Do you have different experience? If you have a positive experience then please share.
Well, there's this one person I know who uses it sometimes, and by my humble judgement he's rather mature, intelligent, and generally funny. Also rather quite handsome. And good with children. And humble, too. Hates explaining his jokes, though.
 
Reply
  • Haha
  • Like
Likes phinds, Wrichik Basu and pinball1970
  • #12,993
Bandersnatch said:
Well, there's this one person I know who uses it sometimes, and by my humble judgement he's rather mature, intelligent, and generally funny. Also rather quite handsome. And good with children. And humble, too. Hates explaining his jokes, though.
QED
 
  • #12,994
Bandersnatch said:
Well, there's this one person I know who uses it sometimes, and by my humble judgement he's rather mature, intelligent, and generally funny. Also rather quite handsome. And good with children. And humble, too. Hates explaining his jokes, though.

QEE

A quick reminder:
Greg Bernhardt said:
When posting a new topic do not use the CAPS lock (all-CAPS), bold, oversized, non-standard, or brightly colored fonts, or any combination thereof.
 
Reply
  • Sad
Likes Bandersnatch
  • #12,995
fresh_42 said:
QEE

A quick reminder:
Apologies I was trying to be pithy.

Quod erat demonstradum.
 
  • #12,996
fresh_42 said:
QEE

A quick reminder:
QEE?
 
  • #12,997
pinball1970 said:
QEE?
Quod erat expectandum.


1657820980270.png

(lIchopbe'chugh bommey DIlIjbe'mo' - Changing fonts is not funny.)
 
Last edited:
Reply
  • Wow
Likes pinball1970
  • #12,998
I just read another page about disliked fonts (linked to from the first font page I posted above), and I laughed when I read this quote about the font "Curlz MT":

"Curlz MT is not a font; it's a cry for help."

:)

From: The 7 worst fonts
https://lmnop.blogs.com/lauren/2006/10/americas_most_f.html
 
Reply
  • Haha
  • Like
Likes Wrichik Basu and pinball1970
  • #12,999
fresh_42 said:
Quod erat expectandum.


View attachment 304178

( lIchopbe'chugh bommey DIlIjbe'mo' - Changing fonts is not funny.)
Numbers? This is what happens when you stick a pithy Latin phrase in front of a mathematician.
I was going for the, Quidquid latine dictum, altum videtur concept.
 
  • #13,000
DennisN said:
I just read another page about disliked fonts (linked to from the first font page I posted above), and I laughed when I read this quote about the font "Curlz MT":

"Curlz MT is not a font; it's a cry for help."

:)

From: The 7 worst fonts
https://lmnop.blogs.com/lauren/2006/10/americas_most_f.html
America's most fronted. Probably the best named website after? I don't know. I'm in awe.
Please take note of enemy number one. @Bandersnatch
 
Reply
  • Love
Likes Bandersnatch
  • #13,001
pinball1970 said:
Numbers? This is what happens when you stick a pithy Latin phrase in front of a mathematician.
I was going for the, Quidquid latine dictum, altum videtur concept.
That's why I said changing fonts is not funny on Klingon!
 
Reply
  • Haha
Likes pinball1970
  • #13,002
fresh_42 said:
That's why I said changing fonts is not funny on Klingon!
Oh dash it!
How many times have I been made to look like an idiot because of Klingon?
I feel like a fool. Again.
 
  • #13,003
For the record, I personally don't dislike those fonts as much as they are described on the pages I posted. I just think some quotes are funny. :smile:
 
Reply
  • Haha
Likes pinball1970
  • #13,004
pinball1970 said:
Oh dash it!
How many times have I been made to look like an idiot because of Klingon?
I feel like a fool. Again.
Here is the solution:
https://www.translator.eu/

Ok, I also installed Klingon fonts once.
 
  • #13,005
Ok, I also installed Klingon fonts once.
[/QUOTE]
Your English is better than my German and my Hungarian is a lot worse than I thought it was.
My Klingon? I would rather move on from that.
 
  • #13,006
The story I read about Klingon is that the language was created for Star Trek VI, consistent with bits and pieces that had been spoken before. Just for laughs, the guy who created it gave it no verb "to be", wrote a dictionary, and went to see Nick Meyer, the director. Star Trek VI, you may recall, is the one with the Klingons who love Shakespeare - so the first thing Meyer asks is "how do you say 'to be, or not to be' In Klingon?"
 
Reply
  • Informative
  • Like
Likes BillTre and pinball1970
  • #13,007
_nc_ohc=5kvelrv__qAAX_mRMuZ&_nc_ht=scontent-dus1-1.jpg
 
Reply
  • Like
  • Haha
Likes FuzzySphere, dextercioby, pinball1970 and 3 others
  • #13,008
She might not be so happy if she knew what was going on below deck.

machine_learning_joke.jpg
 
Reply
  • Haha
  • Like
Likes Ibix, Jodo and DennisN
  • #13,009

Accordion to a scientific study released by the Department of Psychology at the University of British Columbia,​

most people will not immediately notice if one of the words in a sentence has been replaced with a musical instrument until they've read more than three quarters of the way through it.
 
Reply
  • Haha
  • Like
Likes pinball1970, Borg, DennisN and 1 other person
  • #13,010
Jodo said:
most people will not immediately notice if one of the words in a sentence has been replaced with a musical instrument until they've read more than three quarters of the way through it.
When I listen, I do not immediately notice the beeps that hide the emphasis, or most interesting parts of speech.
But if I said that you had violin well get that job done; would you notice.
 
Reply
  • Haha
Likes pinball1970 and DennisN
  • #13,011
FB_IMG_16578644125882268.jpg
 
Reply
  • Haha
  • Like
Likes strangerep, pinball1970, Bystander and 1 other person
  • #13,012
She's such an overachiever.jpg
 
Reply
  • Like
  • Haha
Likes BillTre, Borg, pinball1970 and 1 other person
  • #13,013
When I was a kid, I thought a lot of adults were pretty stupid. Now I'm an adult myself and I have to say: I was right!
 
Reply
  • Like
Likes DennisN, Ibix and BillTre
  • #13,014
Reggie Jackson driving against traffic is stopped by a cop.

Cop:" Don't you know this is a one-way street?"
Reggie: " I'm only going one way!".
 
  • #13,015
fresh_42 said:
When I was a kid, I thought a lot of adults were pretty stupid. Now I'm an adult myself and I have to say: I was right!
Yeah but Fresh come on man.
How many people have that thing? Or have studied? To that level?
It is your job to drag us kicking and screaming through this.

I will have some sort of a grip before I die. Otherwise, what's the point?
 
  • #13,016
pinball1970 said:
Yeah but Fresh come on man.
How many people have that thing? Or have studied? To that level?
It is your job to drag us kicking and screaming through this.

I will have some sort of a grip before I die. Otherwise, what's the point?
Lost in translation. The German word was "doof" which is not really "stupid" and describes it in a more childish way. It is also self-criticism rather than pointing at others.
 
Reply
  • Like
Likes pinball1970
  • #13,017
pinball1970 said:
I will have some sort of a grip before I die. Otherwise, what's the point?
I'm not sure what this means.

a firm hold; a tight grasp or clasp
an effective form of control over something
a part or attachment by which something is held in the hand

I think "grip" also means influenza in German

either way, I'm lost in translation!
 
  • #13,018
gmax137 said:
I'm not sure what this means.

a firm hold; a tight grasp or clasp
an effective form of control over something
a part or attachment by which something is held in the hand
In the vernacular in the U.S. and, apparently, in the U.K., "get a grip" means to gain control of one's mind -- not taking wildly irrational actions and not having wildly irrational thoughts.

Kind of a "snap out of it and start dealing with the situation at hand".
 
Reply
  • Like
Likes pinball1970, gmax137 and BillTre
  • #13,020
Looks like Rory tried so hard for another birdie, he became one himself!

3818DE59-FD9A-49AB-8B1D-922D766E3DC2.jpeg
 

Similar threads

Programming Jokes: Lame, Science & Math Jokes!
  • · Replies 464 ·
16
Replies
464
Views
34K
Reflecting on 47: An SMBC Comic
  • · Replies 57 ·
2
Replies
57
Views
9K
Constructing a meme - an exercise
  • · Replies 3 ·
Replies
3
Views
364
Bad Math Jokes
  • · Replies 405 ·
14
Replies
405
Views
40K
Weird / Interesing science related objects
  • · Replies 7 ·
Replies
7
Views
3K
What does it tell if you can (or can't) get this joke?
  • · Replies 15 ·
Replies
15
Views
6K
What Are Your Favorite Physics Jokes?
  • · Replies 1 ·
Replies
1
Views
3K
Surely You're Joking, Mr. Feynman! - My Favorite Book
  • · Replies 21 ·
Replies
21
Views
3K
Mini road trip: tigers and goats and bears, oh my
  • · Replies 5 ·
Replies
5
Views
2K
That Will Smith and Chris Rock thing
  • · Replies 185 ·
7
Replies
185
Views
11K