Ibix said:
Raises hand (that's what my avatar is doing with that stick thing)
Well, there are two or three general approaches that come to mind for curve selection. One approach is to measure distances along geodesics curves in space-time. This ultimately leads to fermi-normal coordinates, and one can find good textbook discussions of this approach in Misner, Thorne, Wheeler's, "Gravitation". There are various posts in the PF about them as well as various papers online, many are rather technical. One needs to do a bit more work to define the coordinate system than one does to just measure distances - one might get distrated by understanding the notion of "Fermi-Walker transport", only to realize too late that it's only important for defining the coordinates and not so important for defining the notion of distance.
To define the fermi-normal distance, one starts with some point p on a reference worldline, then one considers the set of space-like geodesics that pass through p and are orthogonal to the reference worldline. Specifying the worldline (or rather the slope of the worldline) specifies the velocity of the observer.
The set of points that these geodesics reach defines a surface of "constant time". The distance from p to another point on this surface of "constant time" is given by the length of the space-like geodesic connecting p to that point.
Note that picking a different rerference worldline through the same point p will pick out a different surface of "constant time" and define a different notion of distance.
One notable point about Fermi-normal coordinates is that they don't cover all of space-time, just some local region where the geodesic curves don't cross.
Another popular approach measures distance along curves that are perpendicular to a set of time-like geodesics. (There is a name, a proper noun, for a set of curves that fill space-time. This name is a congruence, so the set of geodesics that fill space-time would be a geodesic congruence). These curves are not geodesics themselves, hence it's a different approach than the previous one. There are generally a lot of such curves, one would need additional specifications to pick out a particular member of this set, for instance the shortest such curve in this set.
There isn't much literature that I've seen on this approach (but see below) it's not even clear if it's a completely general approach. It's important, though, because this sort of approach,expressed in a coordinate-dependent manner, underlies the approach routinely used to measure distances in cosmology.
[add]If one shifts one focus from the global issues to the local issues, Eric Poisson's "A Relativists Toolkit" would be a good reference for this approach, it has a good discussion of geodesic congruences. Wald has a discussion of geodesic congruences too, but it's rather terse and hard to follow.
Another useful approach would be consider a born-rigid congruence of worldlines. This sort of construction is probably not completely general, but it ties in nicely with the notion of rigid rulers when it does exist. One starts again with a reference worldline, and attempts to construct a set of worldlines that maintain a constant distance from the reference worldline. One needs to have some pre-existing idea of how to measure the distance between worldlines when they are "close enough" to use this approach, however - which is something that I attempted to cover in previous posts.
[add]I haven't tracked down any good detailed references on this - I've seen references to papers written in German (and usually behind paywalls). Unfortunately I don't read German. One can leverage much of the theory of geodesic congruences in Poisson to other congruences, such as rigid congruences, however.
Given the complexities, limitations, and number of possibilities, I would say that the best approach by far is to first understand how distances are defined when points are sufficiently close, as the unifying notion of "distance", common to all the variants that make various compromises and trade-offs when the points are not sufficently close.