Why men are happier than women

[Joel]

Good thing we throw like girls, huh? :tongue:

Yeah, imagine the momentum if men where the one's throwing things around with their strength. As a biologist, you don't think this could be a complimentary explanation to why women have PMS instead of men? :tongue:

I should really get some sleep now... :uhh: Please ignore me.

 

[Evo]

Here you go.

Girlfriends

Last year, my friend upgraded his GirlFriend 3.1 to GirlFriendPlus 1.0 (marketing name: Fiancee 1.0). Recently he upgraded Fiancee 1.0 to Wife 1.0 and it's a memory hogger, it has taken all his space; and Wife 1.0 must be running before he can do anything. Although he did not ask for it, Wife 1.0 came with Plug-Ins such as MotherInLaw and BrotherInLaw.

Some features I'd like to see in the Upcoming GirlFriend 4.0...

A "Don't remind me again" button
Minimize button
Shutdown feature
An install shield feature so that Girlfriend 4.0 can be completely uninstalled if so desired (so you don't lose cache and other objects)
A Remote control for the these features would be a nice upgrade.
I tried running GirlFriend 2.0 with GirlFriend 1.0 still installed, but they tried using the same i/o port and conflicted. Then I tried to uninstall GirlFriend 1.0 but it didn't have an uninstall program. I tried to uninstall it by hand, but it put files in my system directory. Another problem with all versions of GirlFriend that I've used is that it is totally object oriented and only supports hardware with gold plated contacts.

***** BUG WARNING ********

Wife 1.0 has an undocumented bug. If you try to install Mistress 1.1 before uninstalling Wife 1.0, Wife 1.0 will delete MSMoney files before doing the uninstall itself. Then Mistress 1.1 will refuse to install, claiming insufficient resources.

continued... http://techsupt.winbatch.com/webcgi...t.web+Battle~of~the~Sexes+Girl~Friend~1.0.txt

 

[Danger]

Here you go.

Girlfriends

:rofl: :rofl: That's priceless!

 

[Ivan Seeking]

I still thiink that "the world is your urinal" scores pretty darn high in a pinch.

 

[Danger]

:rofl: I don't know...I'm pretty sure we make them suffer along on that one.

A woman that I worked with for years was like that. I don't think that she ever actually had PMS, but she sure as hell was a carrier.

 

[Joel]

:rofl: :rofl: That's priceless!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

It went straight to my girlfriend.

 

[zoobyshoe]

I still thiink that "the world is your urinal" scores pretty darn high in a pinch.

Feynman: yes
Einstein: very doubtful
Niels Bohr: Never!
Heisenberg: uncertain
Newton: probably, but just because he was a country recluse
Galileo: Italian, so absolutely

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Heck, just to prove a point, Feynman once stood on his head and peed for his friends.

 

[saltydog]

I never have multiple dinners. Some nights I don't even get dinner at all!

Sorry to hear you miss dinner some nights. Maybe you're using the wrong equation. How about this one:

$$\int e^x$$

 

[Danger]

Sorry to hear you miss dinner some nights. Maybe you're using the wrong equation. How about this one:

$$\int e^x$$

Yup, that's a pretty long symbol. Should do the trick.

 

[Gale]

Sorry to hear you miss dinner some nights. Maybe you're using the wrong equation. How about this one:

$$\int e^x$$

ok ok, I'm going to be super lame for a minute... first of all... that's not an equation, its an expression... and secondly, its an improper expression at that... what are you integrating with respect to? you need a dx or something. how can you expect to get anywhere with a gal if you're math is all screwy? i mean c'mon now. poor math skills are a hardcore turn off!

ANYways, its a wicked beautiful day. I'm a very happy woman right now, regardless of everything else.

 

[dextercioby]

Gale,it is called "element of integration" or "Riemann measure"...:tongue:

Poor math skills from a girl:major turn off indeed...:tongue2:

Daniel,who else...

 

[zoobyshoe]

ANYways, its a wicked beautiful day. I'm a very happy woman right now, regardless of everything else.

Good dinner last night?

 

[Huckleberry]

ok ok, I'm going to be super lame for a minute... first of all... that's not an equation, its an expression... and secondly, its an improper expression at that... what are you integrating with respect to? you need a dx or something. how can you expect to get anywhere with a gal if you're math is all screwy? i mean c'mon now. poor math skills are a hardcore turn off!

ANYways, its a wicked beautiful day. I'm a very happy woman right now, regardless of everything else.

It's the english language disguised as mathematics. He's definitely hinting at an equation.

 

[saltydog]

ok ok, I'm going to be super lame for a minute... first of all... that's not an equation, its an expression... and secondly, its an improper expression at that... what are you integrating with respect to? you need a dx or something. how can you expect to get anywhere with a gal if you're math is all screwy? i mean c'mon now. poor math skills are a hardcore turn off!

ANYways, its a wicked beautiful day. I'm a very happy woman right now, regardless of everything else.

Gale, it's called "antidifferentiation", you don't need a . . . wait a minitue, now I'm thinking it's . . .are you joking or what? But you're right, it's not an equation. Perhaps a better phrasing would meet your requirements.

You know, antidifferentation can be done in many ways, some ways are more fun than others. The important thing is to take it slowly, taking care to do everything just right so that you arive at the right dinner . . . I mean, solution.

Also, if you're 17, then all I'll say is that truly you are a diamond in your father's eyes and I'm not the least bit interested in antidifferentiating that.

 

[Math Is Hard]

You know, antidifferentation can be done in many ways, some ways are more fun than others. The important thing is to take it slowly, taking care to do everything just right so that you arive at the right dinner . . . I mean, solution.

:rofl: LOL! :rofl: I just read that while I was eating lunch. My eyes are still watering because I choked on my sandwich when I read that last part!

 

[JFo]

[an e-mail received today]

-You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.

[source unknown]

No one else here has the pale chicken leg syndrome?

I'm in jeans 365 days a year, 366 every four (Thanks Mom :grumpy: )

 

[Gale]

Gale, it's called "antidifferentiation", you don't need a . . . wait a minitue, now I'm thinking it's . . .are you joking or what? But you're right, it's not an equation. Perhaps a better phrasing would meet your requirements.

You know, antidifferentation can be done in many ways, some ways are more fun than others. The important thing is to take it slowly, taking care to do everything just right so that you arive at the right dinner . . . I mean, solution.

Also, if you're 17, then all I'll say is that truly you are a diamond in your father's eyes and I'm not the least bit interested in antidifferentiating that.

hahahahahaha... that was lovely... and yes, my father would be most displeased were i to go off antidifferentiating with strangers, but you could still take me out to dinner... eh eh?

 

[infinitetime]

No one else here has the pale chicken leg syndrome?

I'm in jeans 365 days a year, 366 every four (Thanks Mom :grumpy: )

Mom replies, "Son, I told you to join the water ski club, but you insisted on becoming the president of the astronomy club . You can't
blame me !"

_____________

I.T. came from the sky!

 

[DaveC426913]

No one else here has the pale chicken leg syndrome?

Yes. But, as guys, we don't care. It falls in the same category as wrinkles in clothes, randomly-matched socks and hair styles.

 

[TheStatutoryApe]

and guys can be smart without worrying either. Its so awkward being that "smart chick."

Are you kidding?
Maybe it's just because I live in Southern California but it's a tough time looking for an intelligent woman. I don't see why you have to worry about being smart.

 

[TheStatutoryApe]

Yes. But, as guys, we don't care. It falls in the same category as wrinkles in clothes, randomly-matched socks and hair styles.

I think the point is that women do. As much as women try to pass it off like it doesn't matter what a guy looks like you should hear them talk.
"He has no ass."
"He looks like he'll be bald by the time he's thirty."
"Look at the size of his nose."
"He has bad teeth."
"Doesn't look like he has anything in his pants."
ect.

 

[Danger]

My eyes are still watering because I choked on my sandwich when I read that last part!

That wouldn't have happened if you'd been keeping up with your clinic staff exercise sessions.

 

[Gale]

Are you kidding?
Maybe it's just because I live in Southern California but it's a tough time looking for an intelligent woman. I don't see why you have to worry about being smart.

most guys are intimidated by smart girls. Guys want to feel superior. I spose it only makes it worse that I'm athletic, smart, and good with music and drawing... most guys are really uncomfortable with that. I haven't met any men who though it was hot when i helped them with their homework.
men are usually revered if they're intelligent, women are thought to be weird if they are.

 

[Danger]

men are usually revered if they're intelligent, women are thought to be weird if they are.

That's not why we think you're weird... :tongue:

 

[zoobyshoe]

...men are usually revered if they're intelligent...

That's what I keep trying to tell the women around San Diego.

 

[Danger]

That's what I keep trying to tell the women around San Diego.

They might be more inclined to believe you if you climbed out of the wombat enclosure first.

 

[SOS2008]

Hilarious--Maybe I'll have time to read the entire thread. It made me think of photos someone sent me entitled "Why Women Live Longer Then Men." The photo of a man on a ladder in a fountain/pool of about 4' water with an electric drill was great.

 

[Gale]

That's what I keep trying to tell the women around San Diego.

wow... and it doesn't work... those must be some crazy women out there... sheesh! i'll come out there and slap some sense into those women... i mean really... zooby should be able to walk up to a woman, tell her that he's smart, and she should just bow before him. what's this world coming to?!? women should be taking HIM out to dinner!

 

[zoobyshoe]

They might be more inclined to believe you if you climbed out of the wombat enclosure first.

No. I wouldn't want a woman who was an anti-wombatiste

 

[Huckleberry]

wow... and it doesn't work... those must be some crazy women out there... sheesh! i'll come out there and slap some sense into those women... i mean really... zooby should be able to walk up to a woman, tell her that he's smart, and she should just bow before him. what's this world coming to?!? women should be taking HIM out to dinner!

Reading this makes me wish I was smart enough to radiate smartness. What do smart people look like anyway?

 

[zoobyshoe]

wow... and it doesn't work... those must be some crazy women out there... sheesh! i'll come out there and slap some sense into those women... i mean really...

This is a weird state. Look at our governor.

 

[TheStatutoryApe]

most guys are intimidated by smart girls. Guys want to feel superior. I spose it only makes it worse that I'm athletic, smart, and good with music and drawing... most guys are really uncomfortable with that. I haven't met any men who though it was hot when i helped them with their homework.
men are usually revered if they're intelligent, women are thought to be weird if they are.

Men are intimidated by any woman who is attractive. If they aren't worried about whether or not they are good enough for you then they are either freakishly secure with their self esteem or they really aren't that interested.

 

[zoobyshoe]

What do smart people look like anyway?

Hmmm...I remember this picture of Einstein with his tongue sticking out...

 

[Moonbear]

Hmmm...I remember this picture of Einstein with his tongue sticking out...

:tongue2: <--- I never realized that was supposed to be the smart smiley!