Ask a Stupid Quetion Get a Stupid Answer

[matthyaouw]

They lack the egocentricity of nations in the northern hemisphere and realize that up and down are all relative in this contex. Either that or they like to downplay the 'down under' thing as it makes them feel inferior.

The fair is in town this week, and I'm going tonight. What should I take to throw off the high rides at people? Bare in mind I want to cause the maximum mayhem with the least chance of being thrown out or arrested.

 

[Lapin Dormant]

The fair is in town this week, and I'm going tonight. What should I take to throw off the high rides at people? Bare in mind I want to cause the maximum mayhem with the least chance of being thrown out or arrested.

Buckets and Buckets of POPCorn, POPped or un-POPped, you'll have a POPingly good time throwing it all over the place, and if in need of an excuse you could tell them that you are from "Down Under" and thought that it was a way to take something you wanted to send back home, and get it there, CHEAP, so you knew to throw it from the Highest point!

Since Fall has Sprung, cheaply too, is it seasonally to late to wear on sale whites under your winter clothing?

 

[EnumaElish]

Since Fall has Sprung, cheaply too, is it seasonally to late to wear on sale whites under your winter clothing?

No more inappropriate than a pair of white, retro high-heel boots under a shiny pink suit. It's..., it's..., Ballroom blitz! The British will understand. And we understand them. Actually, that's a lie. (White, though.) It's for the sake of our special transatlantic relationship, Andy and Mike. Alright, fellas.

Is it okay to have felt like coming up with a stupid question but not being able to in a satisfying manner?

 

[Lapin Dormant]

Say Cheeeeeeeeseeeeeeeee

Is it okay to have felt like coming up with a stupid question but not being able to in a satisfying manner?

Just see my last effort at Buffalo'ing a Bluff, Laaaaaaaaaaaamo!

If a Buffalo goes over a Bluff, is it a 'Bluffed Buffalo' or a 'Buffaloed' Bluff?


LD
.. .. .. hops in .. .. (A Bluff-Hello?) .. .. .. .. Hops out .. .. ..

 

[zoobyshoe]

Is it okay to have felt like coming up with a stupid question but not being able to in a satisfying manner?

After several days of therapy, hypnosis, drugs, and reading Zen In The Art Of Motorcycle Maintenence I can finally begin to forget you ever asked that quetion.

Recently when I was perusing D.Y. Spulquist's great masterpiece on the subject Psychotic and Personality Disorders Among Tiny Little Black Ants I came across the following:

"...and they will circle erratically, eccentrically, as though intoxicated, or dizzy, shouting all the while: `My Bible has a golden thread bookmark! My Bible has a golden thread bookmark!'..."

which was interesting because I'd seen a crazy woman in a bumper sticker covered van driving around the block shouting the same thing just last week. The third time she passed me she threw a half eaten donut out her window and shrieked: "It's spelled: `Doughnuts,' idiot!" as an adjunct to her bookmark crusade, I suppose. She sideswiped several trees as she swerved back and forth up onto the sidewalk and into the street again, and by her fifth time around a police helicopter showed up and began tailing her.

None of the myriad tiny black ants who now swarmed the donut she'd tossed onto the street in their path cared about any of that as they hungrily attacked the sweet confection, unaware of the terrible toxins in it or of the fact that in several minutes they would all be circling eccentrically, as though dizzy, shouting "My Bible has a gold thread bookmark!"

Who do you suppose poisoned the `doughnuts'?

 

[Lapin Dormant]

Ant-i-rant

Who do you suppose poisoned the `doughnuts'?

Obviously it was the great and renonwed D.Y. Spulquist himself, who had injected them thusly as to try to re-create his heyday of experimental successes and the Adoration of the loving crowds of Ant-o-philes that had followed him everywhere asking him to sign autographs and pursue theoretical notions that they had arrived at after having re-read his tumulteous work, Black ants of the Streets of New York on the prowl
in the Cities underbelly of Sewer Systems side walks

Speaking of which, anyone know where one can purchase that good Tome Self Immolation for Dummies?

(my last copy burned itself up, and I need to replace it.)

 

[zoobyshoe]

You ask it, because you can!
OMG I now have Adam Ant songs pounding in my head! {don't drink, don't smoke, whatdoyado?} How can I make it stop?

You must read D.Y. Spulquist's masterpiece on the subject: On the Eradication Of Tenacious Mental Replay Of Ant-Related Songs, Opera Arias, And Folk Melodies, By The Use Of Chain Letter Spells And Magic. What you will have to do is start a chain letter in which each person must either send a dollar to you, or a picture of a primitive looking skull. Each person must be harshly warned NOT TO BREAK THE CHAIN or they will suffer terribly bad luck. (Which is what's going to happen to cefarix, anyway, for not figuring out the format of this thread.)

In the meantime, I would like to reccomend D.Y. Spluquist's pivotal study of the matter: Ideas From Topology and Game Theory Fused To Explain The Dissapearance Of The Neander-Ant in which Spulquist tries to figure out what happened to a pet tiny black ant he once had whom he named "Neander-Ant" because of its more robust, albeit smaller, endo-skeleton.

Apparently "Neander-Ant" disappeared from his personal ant farm one day, and Spulquist was never able to recover any remains despite having carefully brushed and troweled away each successive layer of the sand in the farm until he reached bottom.

What do you suppose ever happened to "Neander-Ant"?

 

[hypatia]

He should of known Neander-Ant could run very fast, and at the very least, should of covered his house in copious amouts of 2 sided sticky tape. My own personal thoughts...he ran off to find the highly desirable Red Fire Aunties. They have cross bred and spend there evenings singing WE ARE FAM-UH-LEE, while tending the Red Neander eggs.

Don't open that box! Whats in the box?

 

[Lapin Dormant]

Don't open that box! Whats in the box?

A song, once sung, the whole world will start singing it, such that, nothing else will get done, and we will all starve to death, thereafter.

What is the title of 'that song' un-sung?

 

[hypatia]

I can't tell you, its my ..Doomsday song in a box world domination plot! I half to wait until I get a sign from a higher power.
I wonder what the sign will be?

 

[Lapin Dormant]

Look! up in the sky, it's a sign

I wonder what the sign will be?

Available @ Walmart

When singing the song of Ultimate Galactic-Universal destruction, should we first ask for the Key?

 

[hypatia]

No need, the restrooms are always open to the public...Fresh, clean and friendly will be the motto for the new universe!
Now I wonder what we should use the old universe for?

 

[Lapin Dormant]

I need not-knot.

Now I wonder what we should use the old universe for?

We will use them to achieve the desired state of No need, thereafter restrooms are always open to the public...Fresh, clean and friendly, with LOTS OF TP as that is the recycle plan for the Old universe, then it willl be the motto for the new universe!

Now that we no longer need T. P. what will we read while we await our Earned & Desired Divine Staus of "No" Need?

 

[hypatia]

We, of course, will still read the back of the shampoo bottles..and wonder if Psidium Guajava fruit is really good for our hair?

 

[EnumaElish]

We, of course, will still read the back of the shampoo bottles..and wonder if Psidium Guajava fruit is really good for our hair?

May we have a quesion? Is your qustion "is Psidium Guajava fruit is really good for our hair?" ? If so I'd like to answer it in the proper fasion.

What is the proper response to a turkey's sneeze?

 

[zoobyshoe]

What is the proper response to a turkey's sneeze?

A chicken's Gesundheit.

Speeding, chicken-like, across the road to post the next quetion, will I make it, or be squished by someone posting just a second ahead of me?

 

[EnumaElish]

You made it! In worse news, you have just squished the alternative quetion. (Look under your shoe, zooby!)

Why is quetion spelled as queion in this thread?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Why is quetion spelled as queion in this thread?

It isn't. I believe you must be dysqexic.


As I race, chicken-like, across the road in my haste to post the next quetion, will I have time to do that and also knock three times on the pate of a slow witted pedestrian who is staring at me breathing through his mouth?

 

[hypatia]

You knocked on his liver? No wonder the poor guys panting like a dog, spreading his bird flu everywhere! I think we'd all be safter going to the ends of the earth. Which end has less birds?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Which end has less birds?

The end of the Earth with the fewest birds will always be that end where nest rental rates are the highest.

As I race, chicken-like, across the road, to post the next quetion before anyone else gets to it, will I also have time to stop and rescue all the salamanders who misread the Salami Crossing sign?

 

[Lapin Dormant]

As I race, chicken-like, across the road, to post the next quetion before anyone else gets to it, will I also have time to stop and rescue all the salamanders who misread the Salami Crossing sign?

Certainly Hope so as I hear that they Taste "Just Like Chicken"

If it "Tastes Like Chicken", but it runs like a Snake, How much money does it have in it's wallet?

 

[EnumaElish]

If it "Tastes Like Chicken", but it runs like a Snake, How much money does it have in it's wallet?

< total profits Roadrunner cartoons ever made.

Is it the economy?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Is it the economy?

It's the humdity.

This recent news: an unfortunate rabbit was recently struck and killed while dozing in a nearby thread, dreaming of cosmological matters. The unrepentent female motorist who squished the poor hare was quoted as saying "Of course I didn't try to swerve. He was poised to leap at the throat of my defenseless pet tiger."

Or is it the heat?

 

[EnumaElish]

Or is it the heat?

Whatever it is, it is unfortunate that she did what she did after announcing that she would not side with any of the parties in conflicts between desert animals.

Does Starbucks have a plan to open smaller stores inside their larger ones, where one may enjoy a favorite beverage upon getting tired from wandering around in the larger store?

 

[Cosmo16]

Does Starbucks have a plan to open smaller stores inside their larger ones, where one may enjoy a favorite beverage upon getting tired from wandering around in the larger store?

yes, that why they can even sell more things that are exactly the same thing with a longer name?

Which on the topic, how long until starbucks opens up inside of dunkin donuts?

 

[hypatia]

That should be soon, with there new product line..Dunkin Stars. A kosher five point star, and guaranteed 5 good dunks per serving!

hmm gone only 5 days, and back to find the rabbit's untimely demise...was he a Fricassee'in wabbit?

 

[Cosmo16]

hmmm, you would have to ask him.
However, how do you tell a rabbit from a wabbit?

 

[zoobyshoe]

However, how do you tell a rabbit from a wabbit?

This requires several courses in biology, bio-physics, bio-engineering, bio-philosophy, physiology, animal husbandry, veternary medicine, and complete mastery of The Way of the Samurai. Regardless of this education, some experts still can't make out the subtle differences and guess.
Recently when I was digging for jellyfish fossils at the beach I happened to dig up an old guitar pick. Upon close inspection I discovered that it had the name B. Wilson scratched into it. Frankly, I was astonished. How did my old college roomate, Bob Wilson's, guitar pick get to a California beach?

 

[coffee na lang dear]

Maybe somebody picked it..

Why can't we call 11 as onety-one the way we call 21 as twenty one?

 

[El Hombre Invisible]

Because that would cause ambiguity when asked how many Taiwans there are in the world.

If I can't think of a stupid question, am I too stupid or not stupid enough?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Because that would cause ambiguity when asked how many Taiwans there are in the world.
If I can't think of a stupid question, am I too stupid or not stupid enough?

You're neither. You're a delivery boy. Collecting a bill for a bunch of...grocery clerks.

Are you an assassin?

 

[El Hombre Invisible]

You're neither. You're a delivery boy. Collecting a bill for a bunch of...grocery clerks.
Are you an assassin?

I am a soldier. Dipped in egg yolk.
Why is this conversation going in reverse?

 

[zoobyshoe]

I am a soldier. Dipped in egg yolk.
Why is this conversation going in reverse?

No one installed the forward software.

Is reststance futile?

 

[Math Is Hard]

No one installed the forward software.
Is reststance futile?

Yes. All your base are belong to us.

Why is Zooby using a nekkid pichur of himself for his avatar?

 

[hypatia]

If you got it, flaunt it!

You can have my base's, but you can't have my peanutbutter...mmmmm why is Jiff the creamy-ist?