Thank you both for your replies, As I learned it, there are atomic orbitals such as 1s, 2s, 2p, etc for each atom. One system for adjusting orbitals due to the presence of other atoms is the "hybrid atomic orbitals": sp, sp2, sp3, sp3d, and sp3d2 (and I've heard that sp3d3 exists for IF7.) The other system is molecular orbitals, sigma bonds, sigma* bonds, and so forth. My general chemistry text only covered homonuclear diatomic orbitals for periods 1 and 2. My understanding was that s's and p's would merge into an equal number of hybrids, or an equal number of MOs. I did not learn how to convert hybrids to MOs, or how many orbitals of which kinds to use while ignoring the rest. I have never seen a coherent explanation of the "shaded figure 8" pictures that I am guessing are meant to depict p orbitals in or out of phase and making various more elaborate MOs, to describe resonance--and what I have seen from students' notes is inconsistent--which of the options to use, where the nodes are, etc. I am really lacking a criterion for identifying which of the myriad possibilities are relevant. I've seen "MO" diagrams with hybrid orbitals in them! My overall impression is that the names for things are changing, the level of detail demanded is changing, which set of orbitals are relevant to teach is changing, and the models themselves are changing. I have recently seen *ionic bonding* described with sigmas, and a vague rule that orbitals can hybridize/form MOs when they are "similar" in energy level. I can vaguely follow the gist of all this, but when I teach it, my students complain that that isn't how their instructor teaches it, we have language difficulties, and I can't figure out the problems because there always seems to be one or two crucial details of their system that I don't have.
I hope that clarifies a bit where I'm having trouble and what I'm looking for. One more specific example: last week a student brought me a setup with 3 carbons forming a p-system and had a diagram with the figure 8s. I can imagine 8 different ways to shade those orbitals, and even accounting for symmetry I don't see all of them being used. Further, in one state, the middle figure 8 wasn't shaded at ALL. So are there now 64 shading possibilities? You can see my frustration.