It follows from the Einstein field equations for grav. waves in the same way as it follows from the Maxwell equations for em. waves (at least for the linearized Einstein field equations for weak gravitational waves).
The difference is that for em. waves you have a massless spin-1 field for the grav. waves you have a massless spin-2 field. Both have only 2 polarization degrees of freedom, but the multipole expansions start of course with ##J=1## (i.e., the dipole contribution) for the em. field and with ##J=2## (i.e., the quadrupole contribution) for the grav. field.
This is also clear from the heuristical argument considering the sources. In the em. case it's the charge distribution. Of course there's a monopole component given by the total charge. Since this corresponds to a spherical symmetric situation outside the charge distribution (i.e., in the vacuum) it just gives a Coulomb field, no matter how the charge might move. Of course that's just charge conservation, i.e., outside of the charge distribution, no matter how the charge moves, the total charge (the "monopole moment" of the charge distribution) stays constant in time and gives only rise to a static field and no waves. The next term is usually the dipole moment, given (in terms of Cartesian components) by
$$\vec{P}=\int_V \mathrm{d}^3 x \vec{x} \rho(t,\vec{x}),$$
and in general there's no way to transform this away by any Poincare transformation.
For the gravitational field the sources are the mass distributions (in the here considered quasi-Newtonian limit). Concerning the monopole contribution it's the same as with the em. field and the charge distribution: Outside the mass distribution the solution of this spherically symmetric piece is just the static Schwarzschild solution (Birkhoff's theorem for the gravitational field). The dipole piece is just the center of mass, and you can always go to the center-of-mass frame, so that the dipole term vanishes. So the first term which can give rise to gravitational waves is the quadrupole term.