Was My Gym Teacher Out of Line?

[Dawguard]

In a gym class? How much "outside-the-box" thinking is developed in a gym class? Russ is right, it's an important skill to learn to recognize when it's worth making a big fuss over something and fighting the system, and when it's just better to say, "I'm sorry," even if you really aren't, and put it behind you so you can move forward with other things you need to get done.

Very true, some times you just have to ignore it, get on with life and not be thin-skinned about it. As for the "damaging psyche", this is a dangerous path to take. Of course we don't want to abuse any child, far be it for me to advocate that. Sometimes however, a little competition, failure, telling-off, etc., does far more good then bad. There is an inherent danger of over-coddling children so when they become adolesents they don't understand the real world. We don't want our children to think that life is all sweet, fuzzy and comfortable, and if anyone insults you or doesn't give you things then it just isn't fair.
It is very easy to cross this line to over-protection, and recent examples of teachers using purple ink instead of red in order not to "offend" or "damage" the children, or tag being banned on the playground of another school because there will be loosers, and the school doesn't want children to feel like loosers. This line is very easy, far to easy, to cross and I would prefer to ere on overing discipline opposed to not enough. Certainly a balance is needed, but it is much easier and far more dangerous to over-protect then over-correct.

It is also a fallacy that children and young people all have fragile psyches. Sure they're kids, but they are far more resiliant then most would like to believe.

 

[russ_watters]

Would not such an attitude propagate a repressive learning environment, dictating only "in-the-box" thinking and ideals?

No - since you can't win either way, it does nothing to change the situation except to ensure that you don't make the situation worse by adding to a conflict you can't win. In this case, fighting back just means you're going to keep getting hit.

I'm sure everyone has see or heard of situations with police stops where the driver becomes unruly. Whether or not the police officer has done something to aggrivate the driver (some cops are jerks), lashing out at the the police officer always just serves to make things worse. I once had a situation where I was pulled over for making an illegal U-turn at a navy base after 9/11, when half the parking lots were blocked off (so there was nowhere to turn around). The base police (not real police) stood there and insulted me openly, both to my face, then between themselves, back next to their car. Since they couldn't actually do anything to me (not even a fine), I just sat there and agreed with them that I'm an idiot, stroked their egos, etc., because that was the most expedient way to dispose of the situation.

 

[pallidin]

Very very few have superiority-complexes... that's an absurd generalization

I'm clearly saying that IF an educator demeans a minor student in front of his/her peers, that this is against standard norms of educator practice, and potentially psychologically damaging to the minor student. That is a fact.
That ANY educator would do this tells me(no I'm NOT sorry), that they have issues, be it "superiority" or otherwise.

 

[Vincent Vega]

The "anger vibes" could be a reaction to a sense and her way of describing it.

Emotional and social sensitivity -- an acute awareness of other people and the environment -- allows a child to sense the emotional temperature in a room, heightened tension, for example.

The tongue can cut deeper than a sword. What damage was done, was done in front of a crowd. Perhaps it triggered anxiety? Walking away from that situation isn't uncommon, as it could be followed by nausea, shortness of breath and other symptoms.

 

[Pengwuino]

What the heck is emotional temperature

 

[Moonbear]

I do not agree with any instructor that temporarily prohibits any student from going to the bathroom, whether that student asked for permission or not.

When you got to go, you got to go.

Except when they just came FROM the lockerroom to start gym class. If she wasn't changing her clothes, then she had ample time to use the restroom before class began. It sounds more like she was pouting, and the teacher knew exactly what she was up to.

Has nobody even considered that the teacher may be given this student a harder time than the other two kids who habitually break the rules because he thinks she IS capable of doing better? Sometimes a teacher tries to push a student they know can achieve more.

First, all the teacher did was "single her out" for not wearing her gym clothes. That could have been nothing more than, "Maggie, why aren't you changed into gym clothes?" The next thing we're told is she tries to walk out of class without permission...considering the attitude, it sounds like it was likely pouting, all because she was corrected for doing something she knows she shouldn't do. The teacher tells her to finish the exercise before leaving, again, nothing unusual there. Get the student engaged in the assignment and set the problem aside as taken care of.

Sorry, but I don't think you're "damaging a fragile psyche" by correcting a student when they do something wrong and then get defiant when told they are wrong. Nothing in the opening post indicates any sort of "dressing down." It just says the teacher threatened to call her parents. We're also only getting one side of the story. "It's all the big, bad, mean teacher's fault for getting me in trouble for something I did that I knew I wasn't supposed to do." If their psyche is that fragile, then they need to seek professional help and present a note from their doctor to the teacher that says they require special consideration. 8th grade is too old to be running off crying because you got in trouble for not following the rules.

 

[Moonbear]

I'm not generalizing anyone! I'm clearly saying that IF an educator demeans a minor student in front of his/her peers...

But there is nothing in this story that indicates she was demeaned in front of her peers. The teacher may have spoken a bit out of frustration over the attitude, and the generalization to all G/T students was inappropriate, but that was all done privately, not in front of the whole class. Though, perhaps the teacher should have simply done what my teachers did if a student broke rules and then got defiant about it...send her to the principal's office. But, I'm sure that would have been considered "public humiliation" too. There's just way too much coddling going on anymore, and it's starting to show its effects in the college-aged population as well now. They just can't resolve simple, common conflicts on their own that any adult ought to be able to resolve. (Yes, there are exceptions of more mature students, but they are becoming too much of an exception rather than the rule.)

 

[shmoe]

The remainder of the discussion took place in the teacher's office, which is NOT in front of all the other students, and is the appropriate place for the more stern disciplinary action, including calling one's parents.

It sounded like the other students were watching through the window though, not exactly private. Who knows though, we have only one very biased view of what happened.

I liked your (Moonbear) gym story. I was always the small geeky kid and we never played the sports in gym that I did outside school and was competent at (badminton and soccer). In grade 9 we did a weightlifting unit. I was the smallest in the class, but years of soccer my legs were by far the strongest, so that was a fun few days (very weak upper body though- heavier textbooks have since improved this!).


Anyhoo, gym at this age is all about suffering. Whatever terrible things I remember happening, I never had to swim naked in the winter in gym class so it could have been worse.

 

[loseyourname]

Since they couldn't actually do anything to me (not even a fine), I just sat there and agreed with them that I'm an idiot, stroked their egos, etc., because that was the most expedient way to dispose of the situation.

I'll never forget an incident at the corner of Katella Ave. and Disneyland Dr., right in front of the park, where the freeway exit merges with the entrance to the Mickey and Friends parking structure. I was on my way out and needed to make a U-turn, but the light had just changed. The intersection is huge, so I knew it was going to be a while until my light came around. However, the way the light situation was set up, no one was going in the direction I wanted to go in, and the crosswalk was wide enough to fit my car through, so I figured I'd just go, and since I wasn't going to physically enter the intersection anyway, it would be fine.

Of course, there was a cop right there that I never even saw, and he immediately pulled me over. When he asked me what I was doing, I just said that I didn't want to wait, knew what I was doing posed no actual danger to anyone, so I did it, even though it was illegal, and I would gladly accept the consequences. I still got fined, but that's about the only time a cop has cited me for something without giving me any **** about it. It really makes me wonder about the accuracy of Hunter Thompson's statement regarding the cop psychology in Fear and Loathing (about slowing down too quickly and showing fear when being pulled over resulting in the arousing of contempt in the cop heart). Sure, you don't want to challenge them, but you don't want to show weakness or be overly apologetic, either. Let him know that you acknowledge his legal power over you, but make sure he always knows that he has no psychological power over you, and that it is a wasted effort of his to try and abuse such a power.

Anyway, to the original poster, I would have just whipped it out and pissed on the workout station, but that's just me. I was a real 'attitude-problem' in middle school. I did my homework and aced my tests, but outside of that, never let a teacher tell me what to do and made sure they knew that they had no power over me (after all, the best they could do was kick me out of one class and put me into another equally good class - it's not like I was committing expulsion-level offenses).

That's what you have to realize about middle school. That crap they tell you about a permanent record is completely false. Even a juvenile criminal record is usually expunged when you reach adulthood. No college gives one hoot what you did in middle school, and all that high schools care is that you graduated, which you can do even if you are constantly getting in trouble (heck, I got straight As, set a school record for the mile, and won the school money on a game show in middle school despite being a defiant troublemaker). Ultimately, the only control they exercise over you rests upon their ability to instill fear in you. They call your parents, send you to the ALC, suspend you from classes, yell at you. So what? None of this changes the one thing that actually matters in middle school - your getting a passing grade in all of your classes. Just so long as you realize the insignificance of every form of punishment they can level at you short of failing and expulsion, and don't fear these forms of punishment, all that is left for you to do is to not commit offenses that can result in failure or expulsion, and you'll be fine. Other than that, you are free, something that every schoolmaster hopes the students never realize.

That said, I'm only siding with you because I've been an 8th grade gifted/talented student that was bored with pointless classes in which I learned little to nothing; I've never been a schoolteacher trying my darndest to deal with punk kids like me. I'm with everyone here that says you need to learn to pick your battles and only fight the ones you can win. However, the fact is that you're never going to know your own limits until you've pushed yourself to them. The only way to learn what battles you can and can't win is to fight every one and see which ones you lose; you're not going to learn it by listening to adults that are simply going to tell you to always do as authority figures say.

 

[zeronem]

I have a pretty low opinion of most teachers. They always (before high school) tend to be the dreamy "i can save the world personally" types that barely got into college and really have no business attempting to educate our children. They kinda act a bit irrational and all seem to have this artsy lightheaded personality. While it's great for all this creativity bs, it doesn't sustain an economy.

High school teachers don't act that way however. I can't really make a generalization about the teachers I've had personally. College professors just love their job it seems... except lecturers there part time haha.

Alright I can agree. I work at the college and spend my time tutoring High School students as my job. The students I am tutoring have incredible potential. But you know what, there is absolutely something wrong with America's school system. Teachers of grade school, particularly in the area of High School and Junior High are failing to reach these students. When I was in High School it was a complete joke. All I did was turn in my homework and make Straight A's. I never studied throughout all that. So I decided if the High School can't challenge me then I would have to challenge myself. So then I started getting into some heavy duty reading of Mathematics and Physics books.

Alright back to the subject anyways. I had to tutor this High School student who was working on formulating equations to describe situations about Exponential increase or decrease. An important part of solving some of these problems is through the use of Logarithms. I tutored the student on how to use the logarithm to solve for x. It's the only way to solve for x unless you want to guess some values of x that would work, which is not what you should do. Anyways, He showed his teacher this method and the teacher said to him, "Is this a new kind of math?" A ****ing high school teacher said that! How is this teacher teaching this class specifically about equations describing situations of exponential increase or decrease without the use of logarithms to be able to solve for the independent variable?

****, you shouldn't be teaching Algebra II in High School if you don't have any idea wtf a logarithm is.

Here's what happening, all the cool teachers teach college students at colleges, and all the lazy ****ty teachers teach grade school. Teaching is a performance job. I didn't realize that teaching was a performance job until I went to college and watched teachers actually perform. In High School, teachers are not performing. This is why America's school system is ****ty. This reminds me when they gave an american class of high school students a test and went across the ocean and gave a class of high school students in Belgium the same test, the students in belgium all scored dramatically higher then the students in America.

I won't lie to you though, I remember there would always be one of those rare High School Teachers that would actually perform and teach.

I'm sure you guys are all aware of the various problems with America's education system. Something needs to be done about it. Way to many students are having to take intermediary algebra in college right after they just got out of High School. In High School every student has to go up to Algebra II in math. Either the students are drinking beer and smoking entirely to much weed during weekend parties, or the teachers are just not performing and they themselves are smoking entirely to much weed.

This is all purely opinionated, but you know what I think there's a lot of truth in it.

 

[pallidin]

But there is nothing in this story that indicates she was demeaned in front of her peers. The teacher may have spoken a bit out of frustration over the attitude, and the generalization to all G/T students was inappropriate, but that was all done privately, not in front of the whole class. Though, perhaps the teacher should have simply done what my teachers did if a student broke rules and then got defiant about it...send her to the principal's office. But, I'm sure that would have been considered "public humiliation" too. There's just way too much coddling going on anymore, and it's starting to show its effects in the college-aged population as well now. They just can't resolve simple, common conflicts on their own that any adult ought to be able to resolve. (Yes, there are exceptions of more mature students, but they are becoming too much of an exception rather than the rule.)

I am sure you are correct. Perhaps my extension of educator/minor student relations was over-drawn in that circumstance, but I hope you and others can appreciate the concern.
What I find most compelling with your post is your statement "...There's just way too much coddling going on anymore..."
Indeed, and that is a serious problem.

As I retire for the evening may everyone, including myself, remember that the fate of our children rests, in part, with our decisions for their growth.

Peace to all.

 

[Curious3141]

Anyhoo, gym at this age is all about suffering. Whatever terrible things I remember happening, I never had to swim naked in the winter in gym class so it could have been worse.

I just watched the rerun of the Seinfeld ep about the gym teacher ("CAN'TSTANDYA", giving George wedgies, etc.). And the bit that Seinfeld did about gym being like "Lord of the Flies" and disrupting the general civility of the rest of the school day rang very true.

 

[Moonbear]

I am sure you are correct. Perhaps my extension of educator/minor student relations was over-drawn in that circumstance, but I hope you and others can appreciate the concern.

I do appreciate the concern, I just think it was getting muddled up coming across as if you meant it specifically in this case, when you were referring in general to an "if it happened like..." situation.

What I find most compelling with your post is your statement "...There's just way too much coddling going on anymore..."
Indeed, and that is a serious problem.

Yes, I think somewhere between corporal punishment in the schools and the over-coddling and fear of hurting feelings, someone missed the reasonable middle ground that helps shape youth into responsible adults in a constructive rather than destructive manner.

 

[Vincent Vega]

I think Joe Schmoe that makes under 50 a year is only capable of playing dodge ball games, and is incapable when it comes to playing with peoples emotions. How would a psychologist handle that situation, with a group of gifted children? Would he single out one and call one out in public, or would that take place in private? What's the purpose of calling one out in public? To make an example?

 

[Moonbear]

I think Joe Schmoe that makes under 50 a year is only capable of playing dodge ball games, and is incapable when it comes to playing with peoples emotions. How would a psychologist handle that situation, with a group of gifted children? Would he single out one and call one out in public, or would that take place in private? What's the purpose of calling one out in public? To make an example?

Why should it be any different in gym class than any other class? If a student showed up to their algebra class without their book when they were told to bring it, should the teacher not ask, "where is your book?" And would it be acceptable for the student to get defiant with the teacher for asking?

Also, Phys. Ed. teachers are still teachers. They go through the education courses, which includes educational psychology, just like all the other teachers do. It's rather demeaning to suggest a phys ed teacher is only capable of playing dodge ball.

And, why should a group of gifted children be any different than any other children when it comes to emotional issues?

 

[jimmy p]

Wow... school in America sounds really daunting...

When I was at school (in England), if you for got your P.E. kit it was a straight detention. 15 minutes of doing nothing. Not too much of a punishment. Oh and you didn't do PE either. You just watched. No-one ever complained, we knew the rules.

It was much the same with every class really. Of course there were naughty kids but no-one really gave a load of attitude. They just mucked about. Maybe us Brits are too accepting.

 

[Chi Meson]

I didn't gety a chance yet to read all posts, but I must (as a High School teacher) give three perspective points.

You rarely get the full story from an upset student.

The number one rule for a teacher is: never ridicule a student.
Number two is: If you break rule one, don't do it in front of other students.

And no, most teachers do NOT have a problem. Some do, and perhaps in some localities a local majority do, but most are in fact reasonably intelligent, dedicated people who are given 25 to 30 samples from the local society.

 

[FredGarvin]

Chi,

In all seriousness, I'd be interested to know where you think the line is between protecting young, fragile psyches and not doing the job as a teacher/disciplinarian should lies. When I read the OP I see the first half of the post as a girl who is nothing but bad attitude. I can not blame the teacher one bit. I also agree with Moonbear in that I saw nothing in the post about the teacher humiliating the girl in front of everyone.

Is simply a teacher calling a student out for not keeping up their responsibilities in class an excuse for this kind of behaviour?

 

[scorpa]

It's pretty well impossible to decide what side to take after reading only one, very biased side but just going from what the original poster said I have to say the teacher probably wasn't all that out of line. Number 1, it's the students job to be responsible and keep their gym clothes clean, it's not the teachers fault if they aren't responsible enough to maintain their equipment. In my gym class we would be in big trouble and be docked marks for not having proper gym strip...but hey if that happened we deserved it. We knew that we had to have it, so if we didn't there were consequences. The poster sounded like they had more than enough time to go to the bathroom before class, it's not like they used the time to change, and last time I checked you had to ask permission to leave the class even if it is just gym, no wonder the teacher got angry. The poster sounds like by this time they were pouting and not very happy in general, which means they probably weren't putting a whole lot of effort or enthusiasm into the circuit, go figure that the teacher would get mad. If the teacher was really being a jerk, I don't know, there's no way anyone here can, but if he was I apologize. Sounds to me like the kid deserved what she got. But this is coming from someone who loved gym class so maybe that makes me a bit biased lol.

 

[Astronuc]

In junior high, boys had to swim naked - in winter time no less. We never did understand why, because the boys swim team wore bathing suits. Apparently, the logic was that the staff did not want boys leaving wet trunks in metal lockers.

*prays to his God that this is a joke*

No, it is not a joke. The water was cold (indoor, non-heated pool), the air was cold, and it was no fun standing around naked waiting to get in the water, nor was it fun having to walk naked past the gym teacher.

It was humiliating for some, and there were those who didn't swim because of embarassment. And there were several parents who weren't happy about it. But that was 'policy' in a large urban junior high school.

But most just dealt with it.

 

[Astronuc]

Most of my math and science teachers were great, highly competent, and highly dedicated. But then I had the best teachers in the high school, since I was in the honors/AP courses. We also used college textbooks during junior and senior years.

Many teachers were not as good, and some were just burned out. It can be tough being a teacher, especially with 25-30 with a huge variation in skill and behavior. There are kids who want to learn and others who, for whatever reason, just don't want to do the work. And teenagers have a variety of emotional issues they are going through - and then there are those who have to deal with bad situations at home.

When I taught at university, my approach to talk to the class, and let them know I was there to work with them. If anyone had problems, I let them know I was available. If a student did poorly, I'd make an effort to find out and work with the student. It didn't always work though.

I see education as a partnership btween teacher and student - not a peer-to-peer relationship, but a mentor to protégé relationship. This is also my approach to management. Adversarial relationships are counter-productive and useless.

protégé - one who is protected or trained or whose career is furthered by a person of experience, prominence, or influence.

In the OP, I think the reference to once a month meant that she was menstruating, and the gym suit was 'unclean'. But Moonbear is right in that the student is responsible to have the gym suit cleaned, or have an extra gym suit just in case.

It does appear that the teacher mishandled the situation.

I would hope that pinapples can find a way to repair the relationship with the teacher, even though the class is only a PE class.

 

[jimmy p]

No, it is not a joke. The water was cold (indoor, non-heated pool), the air was cold, and it was no fun standing around naked waiting to get in the water, nor was it fun having to walk naked past the gym teacher.

Can't have done much to boost a guy's ego with all that cold air and water. Bet the girls got a giggle though.

 

[Averagesupernova]

I really can't believe that ONE post has made this thread this long. I would not be surprised if the whole incident didn't even happen and the OP is sitting back watching all of you go on and on and on and on and on and laughing uncontrollably about how it appears none of you have anything better to do. One post (her first and only post) does not warrant 5 pages worth of discussion.
-
Astro, I would say one possible reason that they made you swim nakey was to bring everyone down to the same level. Humiliate every last one of you and then build you up to what they want the same way the military does. Also, being disiplined while naked seems to have MUCH more effect.

 

[franzbaer]

I really can't believe that ONE post has made this thread this long. I would not be surprised if the whole incident didn't even happen and the OP is sitting back watching all of you go on and on and on and on and on and laughing uncontrollably about how it appears none of you have anything better to do. One post (her first and only post) does not warrant 5 pages worth of discussion.

Have you read TKC? One post, just one, spawned well over ten thousand replies. And it created me. The power of one post is not easily dismissed.

 

[Averagesupernova]

Actually franz, you have just illustrated my point VERY well. It could be any of us.

 

[franzbaer]

Actually franz, you have just illustrated my point VERY well. It could be any of us.

Maybe sullying with humans has lowered my intellegence, but I can't make head or tails of this. What could be any of us, how did I make your point? I don't get it?

 

[Astronuc]

I really can't believe that ONE post has made this thread this long. I would not be surprised if the whole incident didn't even happen and the OP is sitting back watching all of you go on and on and on and on and on and laughing uncontrollably about how it appears none of you have anything better to do. One post (her first and only post) does not warrant 5 pages worth of discussion.

That very well could be the case, which brings up the matters of "why people post" and "why do people post/write what they post/write".

For me, I give the poster the benefit of doubt and respond at my discretion.

The OP describes a conflict between student (ostensibly the poster) and teacher. That is probably not uncommon for the population at PF, most of whom appear to be students, and then there are those of us who have taught.

So my approach is to consider the sitution, whether fiction or not, and post my thoughts in hopes that it provides some help to the OP as well as to others who might find themselves in a similar situation.

I am afterall a perpertual student and teacher, and I am inherently and insatiably curious. I learn something new everyday, and I willingly share what I learn with others. Hopefully what I share is useful and meaningful to others.

 

[FredGarvin]

I really can't believe that ONE post has made this thread this long. I would not be surprised if the whole incident didn't even happen and the OP is sitting back watching all of you go on and on and on and on and on and laughing uncontrollably...

I thought the same thing too. It is indeed possible. I'd like to think we're off the radar for moronic trolling, but we may not be any longer.

One post (her first and only post) does not warrant 5 pages worth of discussion.

Start a thread that asks how a parent would handle a certain situation. I'd bet it would go on for ever. I think it's the same kind of thing here.

 

[Astronuc]

Perhaps we need a Dear Abby thread?

 

[arildno]

I didn't dress out for gym because my gymsuit was freaking nasty dirty.

You KNEW you were having gym today. Why did you CHOOSE not to get it cleaned before your lesson?
Why did you actively eschew something you knew might well happen?

Thats not a big deal, it's a once a month thing,

Sure it is. Now, you are trivializing your sabotage of your physical edfucation

but he SINGALED me out of the whole class for it

Which is something you deserve.

when two other ppl do this every day.

This isn't true, you know this.

Anyway, we were doing this fitness day thing. stuuuuuupid.

And you're not the one to refrain from saying so, and actively disrupt the teacher's plans for the day, are you?

So Then, I started walking to the locker room.

Who the heck gave you permission to do that?
Stop acting like a self-important brat.

He said, "Maggie where are you going?"

Perfectly rational behaviour from his side.

and I said "The bathroom" and he said "Finsih this first".

Again, correctly handled by him.

So I finished the stupid station I was at.

And you didn't bother from saying so, did you?

Then I went. I got back out, and he's mad at me!

He had every reason to be that.

"I said FINSIH this first!" and I was like, "I did!" and he said, "I meant the whole ting course!" HOW was I supposed to know??

Because he had said so to the entire class; what makes you so damn special?
Why do you deserve to get off lighter than others?

That doesn't even make sense!

Yes it does.


I could go on and on. You sound like an atrocious little spoiled brat.

 

[BobG]

Perhaps we need a Dear Abby thread?

Dear Abby, Dear Abby ...
My feet are too long
My hair's falling out and my rights are all wrong
My friends they all tell me that I've no friends at all
Won't you write me a letter, Won't you give me a call
Signed Bewildered

Bewildered, Bewildered...

You have no complaint
You are what your are and you ain't what you ain't
So listen up Buster, and listen up good
Stop wishing for bad luck and knocking on wood
... and quit bugging these people you keep calling friends

Dear Abby, Dear Abby...
My fountain pen leaks
My wife hollers at me and my kids are all freaks
Every side I get up on is the wrong side of bed
If it weren't so expensive I'd wish I were dead
Signed Unhappy

Unhappy, Unhappy...
You have no complaint
You are what your are and you ain't what you ain't
So listen up Buster, and listen up good
Stop wishing for bad luck and knocking on wood
... and go whittle yourself a pencil


Dear Abby, Dear Abby...
You won't believe this
But my stomach makes noises whenever I kiss
My girlfriend tells me It's all in my head
But my stomach tells me to write you instead
Signed Noise-maker

Noise-maker, Noise-maker
You have no complaint
You are what your are and you ain't what you ain't
So listen up Buster, and listen up good
Stop wishing for bad luck and knocking on wood
... and don't drink Old Milwaukee on the same nights you have Pace Picante Sauce

Dear Abby, Dear Abby...
Well I never thought
That me and my girlfriend would ever get caught
We were sitting in the back seat just shooting the breeze
With her hair up in curlers and her pants to her knees
Signed Just Married

Just Married, Just Married...
You have no complaint
You are what your are and you ain't what you ain't
So listen up Buster, and listen up good
Stop wishing for bad luck and knocking on wood
... and I hope your wife's name is Lorena

 

[Dawguard]

I could go on and on. You sound like an atrocious little spoiled brat.

Wow, arildno, you really say what you mean, don't you? I agree with you though, and I thank you for saying something I probably wouldn't have, but something that still needed saying.

 

[pineapples]

You're a spoiled little brat which means you are an average 8th grade kid. Just realize that in 5 or so years you'll realize what a little moron you were and you'll move on with your life. At least we hope so.

Nice first post. I can think of no better way to introduce yourself to a forum of strangers than an emo outburst. I want those 2 minutes of my life back that I used to read it.

Jason, I think I have to agree with Pallidin. Blanket statements like that to someone, who is obviously trolling for comments like that, are not productive and help no one.

Wow, you must be a really nice person FredGarvin. Just to let you know, this IS NOT my first post! God I'm not THAT stupid! My old screen name is totallyclueless, but I got a new one. OK??
Why bother coming here? If I show any opinion or personality at all, people say I need an "attitude adjustment" or people shoot me down just because I'm young and don't have a PhD!

 

[pineapples]

Ugh! I can't say anything on here without every word being analyzed, most of the time in a mean close-minded way! I asked if my teacher was out of line, NOT if you liked me or thought I was a brat!
You don't have to waste your lives reading or responding to this if you don't want to! Keep your rude comments to yourself

 

[pineapples]

OK, when I said he was ugly and wrinkly, I was obviously just being dramatic. I was really mad when I wrote that. That's just how I felt at the time. I should have said so. When I said I was sending hate vibes, I should have figured you wouldn't understand and think I sounded stupid. What's the word to explain it? I couldn't think of anything so I just said hate vibes. But I'm serious, there are two people in my class who NEVER dress out and one of them seriously does have way more attitude than me. He's never done that to her. And I'm not dramatizing the whole incident! He really upset me. I guess you had to be there. If you still think I'm a spoiled, stupid brat, you can just go right on thinking that. I've had people call me much worse than that but none of it is true.

 

[zeronem]

Ugh! I can't say anything on here without every word being analyzed, most of the time in a mean close-minded way! I asked if my teacher was out of line, NOT if you liked me or thought I was a brat!
You don't have to waste your lives reading or responding to this if you don't want to! Keep your rude comments to yourself

Then you posted this in the wrong place. You shouldn't post here if your not expecting every word and sentence to be analyzed by others thoroughly. All your going to run into at this forum are few Scientists and many Scientist wannabe's.

I suggest if you want to get nice answers, go to a forum that might be specifically for this topic.

 

[pineapples]

Well, with that last line, someone who was once an 8th grade girl is definitely going to respond.

The teacher is not out of line to chastise you for not wearing your gym suit. If it was to the point of being so "nasty filthy" that you couldn't stand to wear it, you should have taken it home to wash quite some time ago. The reason you're not supposed to participate in gym class in your street clothes is the same reason that gym suit is "nasty filthy," because you work up a sweat and stink, and by changing clothes, you aren't walking around subjecting everyone to that sweat and stink all day long (they might be more lenient if gym is your last class of the day and you're going straight home).

Having been an 8th grade girl once, the concept of letting your gym clothes get that nasty is, well, nasty in and of itself. We all took our gym clothes home on Friday, laundered them on the weekend, and returned with them on Monday. And we got yelled at and were not permitted to participate if we forgot our gym clothes on Monday (and yes, this led to the occassional frantic phone call to mom the moment the forgetfulness was realized, just hoping she'd be able to get out of work long enough to drop the gym clothes off at school before gym class, so we wouldn't get a 0 for the day for not participating due to lack of appropriate clothing, or we hoped our friends had enough spare clothing to make do).

There is also never any point in trying to justify your own misconduct by pointing out that others are doing it. There may be a very good reason the teacher doesn't chastise the others who do not change into gym clothing, such as they are already failing and it's not worth the hassle anymore. You have no way to know that, and it's none of your business. You know the rules and are supposed to follow them.

As for it being "stupid," I'm sure that's exactly the attitude the teacher picked up on. Instead of saying, "I'm sorry, I forgot to take my gym clothes home to wash and they are too dirty to wear today," or, "I know, I'm sorry, is it possible I could borrow some from somebody," you probably just rolled your eyes and muttered under your breath. That's the attitude that's coming across in the opening post.

By the way, there is also no reason that an honors student cannot get an A in gym class. Gym class is usually graded on effort and improvement much more than actual skill. I was horrible in gym class for anything that required running, because I'm just a slow runner. So, whether it was softball or soccer or the 600 meter run, I was the one who never made it to first base, or got the ball passed to me, and was dead last, huffing and puffing when I completed the run, but I always tried my hardest, worked on improving my skills, played my position even if everyone kept the ball away, once really surprised my class when they discovered I was great at free-throws in basketball because they had just come to assume I was hopelessly non-athletic, and always finished the run, even if I felt like I was going to die first. That attitude of trying to do your best, even when it's something you're absolutely awful at doing, is a good life skill to develop. Deciding it's "stupid" because you're not very good at it is called quitting, and that's not a good life skill to have.

Ooh, but then 8th grade was also the year we learned archery in gym class, and I finally found a sport I could beat the other students at. That was fun. And, I think it was also 8th grade when we did weight lifting. Thanks to the rate of physical development differing between boys and girls at that age, I had the immense pleasure of gloating that I was able to bench press more than one of the boys in my class who was on the JV football team. It's always fun when the "non-athletic, geeky" kid can beat someone on the football team at something in gym class, especially when that non-athletic, geeky kid is a girl.

Yeah, I know what you mean about the dirty clothes. I am so busy lately I really just kept forgetting to bring them home. I did try to borrow some but I couldn't.

 

[pineapples]

That she claims she was staring the teacher down and sending "anger vibes" tells me she was very likely copping an attitude. How do you NOT have an attitude when sending "anger vibes," whatever that is? I'm going to have to assume it's what was called "defiance" and "sass" when I was in school.

UGH FORGET about the stupid HATE VIBES! I was basically trying to express my anger without doing anything! WHATEVER! I don't know how to explain it! I sounded really stupid, I get it! It definitely wasn't defiance or sass, because he never gave me a chance to talk...

 

[pineapples]

In the OP, I think the reference to once a month meant that she was menstruating, and the gym suit was 'unclean'. But Moonbear is right in that the student is responsible to have the gym suit cleaned, or have an extra gym suit just in case.

Uhm, actually, noooo, that is not what I meant...

 

[pineapples]

Just for the record, I feel like a complete idiot. I got so wrapped up in my stupid anger because I had nothing better to worry about and for some reason I can't function without an issue in my brain. Not to mention, I kind of humiliated myself too and made people think I was a self-centered, spoiled little kid. Sorry for wasting your lives! Look what I've caused! URGH.

 

[chroot]

pineapples,

It's okay. No one's going to remember any of this next week anyway, including you. You could have handled this better, and your gym teacher probably could've, too. Give him a handshake and let it be water under the bridge. Little tiffs like this, honestly, are how people learn to live in a society full of complicated personalities and power relationships. You're doing fine.

- Warren

 

[heartless]

Hello,

So, what do you indent and plan to do now with this case?

By the way, You're lucky you don't live in China. My school fellow who lived there for a part of life, said, there teachers are allowed to beat students. Not once he received a face punch for failed tests and misbehavior. Anyway, most of the people are just like you in J.H.S. I was almost no different than you, I mean, Teachers never yelled at me, but I received frequent home calls. Then I learned how to learn to fix my own mistakes. This is the part when I'm currently standing on, I'm learning how to fix my own mistakes, and it isn't that easy yet. Just in case... Try to execute every order teachers tell you to, remember that you come to school, school doesn't come to you. Good Luck and Thanks,

 

[Chi Meson]

I do not agree with any instructor that temporarily prohibits any student from going to the bathroom, whether that student asked for permission or not.

When you got to go, you got to go.

Oh, that one's good.

So any student should be allowed to leave a class at any time they like without any restriction?

"I got to go, Mister!"

That won't fly.

 

[FredGarvin]

Just for the record, I feel like a complete idiot. I got so wrapped up in my stupid anger because I had nothing better to worry about and for some reason I can't function without an issue in my brain. Not to mention, I kind of humiliated myself too and made people think I was a self-centered, spoiled little kid. Sorry for wasting your lives! Look what I've caused! URGH.

Now that is the most inteligent and mature thing you've said so far. Now the important question...did you learn anything from this little event? It appears you did. Now stop feeling sorry for yourself and move on. Chroot had some good advice above.

 

[Moonbear]

Just for the record, I feel like a complete idiot. I got so wrapped up in my stupid anger because I had nothing better to worry about and for some reason I can't function without an issue in my brain. Not to mention, I kind of humiliated myself too and made people think I was a self-centered, spoiled little kid. Sorry for wasting your lives! Look what I've caused! URGH.

As a few others have already said, this is the most important thing, that you've realized your mistake, and can look back at your anger and see how silly it is, and how it just didn't get you anywhere good. Now, take the lesson from it and move forward as a better, slightly more mature person than you were yesterday.

 

[jimmie]

So any student should be allowed to leave a class at any time they like without any restriction?

Yes, and strictly to relieve themselves in the bathroom. The same is true for instructors.

The alternative "depends" on all individuals wearing additional clothing.

 

[BobG]

Yes, and strictly to relieve themselves in the bathroom. The same is true for instructors.

The alternative "depends" on all individuals wearing additional clothing.

Oh, for crying out loud, man, HOLD YOUR WATER!

maybe I've watched Sybil too many times

 

[Chi Meson]

Yes, and strictly to relieve themselves in the bathroom. The same is true for instructors.

The alternative "depends" on all individuals wearing additional clothing.

No.

It won't happen. Do you have a medical condition that makes you the exception to being able to hold it? Everyone else can for at least 40 minutes. The "when you got to go..." line is fiction. I teach sometimes for a four hour non-stop stretch. Is it a miracle that I can hold it? No, that's normal. Do I let any student just walk out of my class whenever they feel a little tinkle coming on.

I'm telling you, forget it. Or get a doctor's note describing your bladder control condition. Or quit talking in the hallway and get to the bathroom before class.

 

[Mk]

Eventually I got tired of staring at his ugly, hairy, wrinkly, distorted face and all my hate/anger vibes had run out

Eh? Got a thing against facial hair huh? I bet us hairy, wrinkly, PFers (possibly ugly and distorted) would disagree. Has Artman said anything yet? Or Zoobyshoe? I'm tempted to say a female member's name, but that would be mean.

I didn't read the whole thread, but my view is, you were both out of line.

The teacher didn't make you cry, you made yourself cry. You were obviously under some amount of pressure, and need to control your crying. Don't just go crying about everything.

Don't let people get under your skin too much. If you let them, they win. Don't let them win easy.

 

[Astronuc]

Sorry for wasting your lives!

If one has learned something, then our time is not wasted. That is why we are here - to learn and to teach - and perhaps be better people for it.

Little tiffs like this, honestly, are how people learn to live in a society full of complicated personalities and power relationships.

Excellent point!