Can PF Random Thoughts be Split to Help with Server Load?

[OmCheeto]

An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer. The second one orders half a beer. The third one orders a quarter of a beer.

The bartender gets frustrated, and pours two glasses of beer. He yells, "You all ain't the only ones who know their limits!"

Meeeeeee! Pick me! I know my limit!

...

I got between a borscht, religion, poetry, and something else argument tonight, at the bar.

I told my bartender to cut me off, permanently...

Unfortunately, he had his hands over his ears also.

My only solution to the whole thing, was to shout out: 2nd Peter, 3:16*!

and leave...

-------------------------
*It involves idiots, and their demise.

 

[zoobyshoe]

Though there was that time when I was listening to the final few seconds of moonlight sonata and someone took my headphones off...I punched the guy, solar plexus, hard. He didn't talk after that.

 

[drizzle]

I iz bored.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

A friend of mine once worked as a Russian translator for the military and directly under the control of the NSA. His job was to monitor and translate Soviet transmissions. He had a top secret clearance and, due to his position, met [or was in the same room with] the director of the NSA on two occasions.

He was telling me tonight that he was once given an award for his work. Someone came in, called him to attention, showed him the medal he had been awarded, congratulated him, and then said that he can't keep it. They could only show him the medal. He never even knew why he had been honored. Apparently he translated something that became important information. His military record shows that he received an award for classified work but it doesn't offer any explanation as to why or for what.

 

[Borg]

A friend of mine once worked as a Russian translator for the military and directly under the control of the NSA. His job was to monitor and translate Soviet transmissions. He had a top secret clearance and, due to his position, met [or was in the same room with] the director of the NSA on two occasions.

He was telling me tonight that he was once given an award for his work. Someone came in, called him to attention, showed him the medal he had been awarded, congratulated him, and then said that he can't keep it. They could only show him the medal. He never even knew why he had been honored. Apparently he translated something that became important information. His military record shows that he received an award for classified work but it doesn't offer any explanation as to why or for what.

Sounds like he didn't have a need to know.

 

[Enigman]

Shame on you, Zshoe!
I am lactose intolerant. I take my adrenochrome with green tea.

 

[Mandelbroth]

Shame on you, Zshoe!
I am lactose intolerant. I take my adrenochrome with green tea.

Quick! Get the Stilton from 5 pages ago!

 

[Enigman]

Quick! Get the Stilton from 5 pages ago!

Then I will win the P F art competition, if you catch my drift...

 

[Mandelbroth]

Then I will win the P F art competition, if you catch my drift...

Are you referring to the gas and diarrhea that are common symptoms of lactose intolerance, or are you saying something less immature?

I'm not an adult yet. I can enjoy immature humor if I want to.

 

[Enigman]

Whatever rolls you on the floor.

 

[Astronuc]

Cute baby pictures.

http://www.viralnova.com/here-are-12-unborn-animals-in-the-womb-theyre-absolutely-beautiful-especially-the-dolphin/

 

[Enigman]

http://cdn.viralnova.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/animals_in_utero_11.jpg
Luke I am your brother.
now that introductions are out of the way, let's play peek-a-boo![/size]

 

[Mandelbroth]

Luke I am your brother.

No. I am. I'm batman.

 

[lisab]

Shame on you, Zshoe!
I am lactose intolerant. I take my adrenochrome with green tea.

We should all strive to be more tolerant, Mr E.

 

[Enigman]

We should all strive to be more tolerant, Mr E.

And funnier too, milady!
-------------------------------
don't know if you got the joke or if I missed something...
"en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alex_(A_Clockwork_Orange)" - guy from zshoe's picture.
Adrenochrome

 

[lisab]

And funnier too, milady!
-------------------------------
don't know if you got the joke or if I missed something...
"en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alex_(A_Clockwork_Orange)" - guy from zshoe's picture.
Adrenochrome

 

[zoobyshoe]

"en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alex_(A_Clockwork_Orange)" - guy from zshoe's picture.
Adrenochrome

You learn something everyday at PF. I thought "drencrom" was a fake drug invented by Burgess in the novel. Here I find out the true origin of the nadsat term.

 

[HeLiXe]

This is so deeply "philosophical" it would get you instantly banned if posted in any other thread. At the same time I am not convinced it is random enough for this one.

The only related principals I am aware of are forum Mentors. You risk their wrath. Please read the forum rules.

this was actually pretty funny

 

[Evo]

My old glasses weren't as clear as they used to be, so I figured I'm getting old, eyesight's getting worse, need new glasses.

Went to the eye doctor, yes, I needed new glasses because my eyesight has improved greatly and my old glasses are too strong for me now.

The optometrist/clerk told me that my posture was too perfect for progressive lenses, she said I held my head too high and straight, which was why I was having problems adapting to them, that most people slouch and lean their face down and that's how the glasses are designed for people.

I used to have progressives and had no problems. She asked if they were very expensive, I said yes, she said that's why.

Ok, cheaper progressives are made for slouchers? I switched to single vision lenses.

 

[jbrussell93]

Mediacom is down and out. I am sad but not depressed because I have a smart phone. Anyone else?

 

[Enigman]

Why can't anyone just get it right? Ack, back I go to the canon.

 

[Borek]

The optometrist/clerk told me that my posture was too perfect for progressive lenses, she said I held my head too high and straight, which was why I was having problems adapting to them, that most people slouch and lean their face down and that's how the glasses are designed for people.

I used to have progressives and had no problems. She asked if they were very expensive, I said yes, she said that's why.

Ok, cheaper progressives are made for slouchers? I switched to single vision lenses.

I am testing progressives ATM (third week) and I am already sure I don't want them. I don't care much about distortions (they are inevitable, which is proven in a Minkwitz's theorem), but anything just to the side looks worse than what I see without glasses. Field of vision they advertise is not "the perfect view" but "not worse than 0.5D" - so in fact perfect view is limited to much more narrow area. I already know I will never use them for driving - too narrow field, too dangerous. I wanted them for field trips and picture taking (I have problems evaluating the picture I see on the camera display is OK without switching to reading glasses) - but again, field is too narrow for effective bird spotting or something like that.

As part of the deal they will replace the glasses with a pair of normal and reading glasses for no additional cost (other than the second frames), and that's what is most likely going to happen in March.

I will have to try bifocals.

 

[Astronuc]

Nice places to visit, but a bit pricey!

http://www.amanresorts.com/

 

[lisab]

The word "restive" means exactly opposite what it sounds like it means.

 

[Astronuc]

Not a yellow brick road, but sparkly -

http://www.takepart.com/article/2013/10/30/starpath-glow-in-the-dark-roads-provide-energy-free-illumination


When I'm out at night, I prefer the dark.

 

[Evo]

I am testing progressives ATM (third week) and I am already sure I don't want them. I don't care much about distortions (they are inevitable, which is proven in a Minkwitz's theorem), but anything just to the side looks worse than what I see without glasses. Field of vision they advertise is not "the perfect view" but "not worse than 0.5D" - so in fact perfect view is limited to much more narrow area. I already know I will never use them for driving - too narrow field, too dangerous. I wanted them for field trips and picture taking (I have problems evaluating the picture I see on the camera display is OK without switching to reading glasses) - but again, field is too narrow for effective bird spotting or something like that.

As part of the deal they will replace the glasses with a pair of normal and reading glasses for no additional cost (other than the second frames), and that's what is most likely going to happen in March.

I will have to try bifocals.

I could get progressives, but I'd have to go back to that high tech place I got my first pair, they are very expensive, mine were varilux tri-focals, apparently the material and expertise to make them so that you don't notice the distortion comes at a high price and very few places have the technology. I can't afford them now. Also, the eye doctor said it's possible that the difference in the near/far vision makes the progressives more difficult.

I had the same problems you're having Borek, I have a small point of clear vision directly ahead but peripheral vision looks like it's smeared with vaseline, very disorienting, I have to completely move my head to directly view anything, I can't just move my eyes because of the lenses.

 

[dlgoff]

I am testing progressives ATM (third week) and I am already sure I don't want them. I don't care much about distortions (they are inevitable, which is proven in a Minkwitz's theorem), but anything just to the side looks worse than what I see without glasses. Field of vision they advertise is not "the perfect view" but "not worse than 0.5D" - so in fact perfect view is limited to much more narrow area. I already know I will never use them for driving - too narrow field, too dangerous. I wanted them for field trips and picture taking (I have problems evaluating the picture I see on the camera display is OK without switching to reading glasses) - but again, field is too narrow for effective bird spotting or something like that.

As part of the deal they will replace the glasses with a pair of normal and reading glasses for no additional cost (other than the second frames), and that's what is most likely going to happen in March.

I will have to try bifocals.

It's hell getting old but luckily we have options, albeit they all have their disadvantages.

Bifocals:

Can't see your feet causing falls (luckily we have hip replacements)

When viewing a desk-top computer monitor you must tip the head back causing what I call 'bifocal neck' (luckily we have good pain relief drugs)


You could do what my friend does. Use contacts; a "far sighted" lens in one eye and a "near sighted" lens in the other eye. (luckily our brains can spatially adapt?)

 

[zoobyshoe]

I don't like insurance commercials where someone else's voice suddenly comes out of people.

 

[Borek]

Bifocals:

Can't see your feet causing falls (luckily we have hip replacements)

New one! And they say you can't teach an old dog new tricks.

When viewing a desk-top computer monitor you must tip the head back causing what I call 'bifocal neck' (luckily we have good pain relief drugs)

That's a non-issue for me - I have separate glasses for computer work.

 

[Enigman]

Tartini is a god and youtube the devil. BUFFER, DARN IT!

EDIT: Note to self: Cursing in PF works wonders with youtube videos.

 

[turbo]

Variables are a PITA. I have opted for single-vision lenses. Luckily, I can see well at close distances. I tried variables for a few years, but the "scissoring" effect was quite unnerving, and I hated having to tilt my head to get just the right amount of correction for various distances. These effects became much more evident when eyeglass frames narrowed.

As a dispensing optician, I had a great deal more latitude when lenses were larger (think Bailey Quarters). You could get a whole lot of correction variables into large lenses like that, without introducing much distortion. Polycarbonate lenses (Lexan) made such lenses much lighter, then perversely the frame styles tightened up so there was much less territory to provide the range of correction without huge distortions.

 

[Enigman]

Je suis mallvelient...
Ok I can still do some french...

 

[Borg]

I have successfully assimilated my wife's cold. I really need better goals in life.

 

[Ibix]

Borg: Resistance is 'flu-tile.

My train home splits into two somewhere further down the line. The front four coaches go to destination X, according to the automatic voice, and the rear three go to destination Y. It then helpfully informed me that I was in coach 8 of 7...

 

[AnTiFreeze3]

I'm opting for lasik eye surgery once I'm old enough. Granted, I've been told I look better with my glasses on rather than off, but contacts and glasses are both very tedious, especially with a physically active life-style.

 

[Enigman]

Installed lucid puppy... it's cute, fits my low specs beautifully. Now to get the VM running.

 

[zoobyshoe]

"A rubber mold of Matt Damon's torso was built for these shots."

"Matt Damon had just starred in 'Ocean's 11."

"That's Chris Cooper from 'American Beauty'"

 

[Enigman]

Installed lucid puppy... it's cute, fits my low specs beautifully. Now to get the VM running.

This is freaky fast...could do with more apps though...

 

[zoobyshoe]

My post count is now 5605. I decided to factor that and found it was 5*19*59.

Factor your post count and let's see if anyone's has a prime greater than 59 as a factor. If not, I win.

http://www.math.com/students/calculators/source/prime-number.htm

 

[Enigman]

My post count is now 5605. I decided to factor that and found it was 5*19*59.

Factor your post count and let's see if anyone's has a prime greater than 59 as a factor. If not, I win.

http://www.math.com/students/calculators/source/prime-number.htm

457 is a prime.

 

[zoobyshoe]

457 is a prime.

Factor your post count and let's see if anyone's has a prime greater than 457 as a factor. If not, Enigman wins.

 

[Charmar]

Factor your post count and let's see if anyone's has a prime greater than 457 as a factor. If not, Enigman wins.

Borg has 701, that is prime.

 

[zoobyshoe]

Borg has 701, that is prime.

Yes it is. So far, Borg wins.

 

[Enigman]

\setlength{\unitlength}{5cm}<br /> \begin{picture}(1,1)<br /> \put(0,0){\line(0,1){1}}<br /> \end{picture}
E: that didn't work...

 

[Borek]

22023=3*3*2447

 

[Enigman]

Today is a good day...repeating that enough times should put me in a self-hypnotic trance so that it might actually start to feel like it.
At least the mangas got updated.

 

[Borg]

22023=3*3*2447

Typical. I get beat at something before I even know I'm in the competition.

Borg: Resistance is 'flu-tile.

 

[zoobyshoe]

22023=3*3*2447

So far, Borek wins.

 

[Enigman]

So far, Borek wins.

Make 17 posts out of the lounge and you will win.

 

[Borek]

To be blunt: I am three posts away from 22027.

But in a few days from now Doc Al will have 40471, and no one will be able to beat that soon.