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Foolish male pride

  1. Jul 17, 2007 #1
    I know of too many guys who will not date a woman unless she is a Miss America stunner or willing to give to their favorite charity (sex). Otherwise, they would rather sit at home watching TV (the "Captain Jack" syndrome). I should know - I practiced this for years.

    Here in Arlington there is a considerable surplus of ladies, most of them intelligent and many available. If I were not dedicated to my current girlfriend, I would have a wide choice of other good women with whom to have a meaningful relationship. As one gets to know them, the more attractive they become, and the more meaningful the prospect of intimacy.

    Do you notice a similar pattern in your neck of the world?
  2. jcsd
  3. Jul 17, 2007 #2


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    I've noticed there aren't enough men worth dating in Kansas, at least not for an agnostic/atheist that has a vocabulary of more than 100 words with more than one syllable and can count without using their fingers.
  4. Jul 17, 2007 #3
    It works both ways. I had trouble getting a date back when my wallet wasn't thick and my car was rusted.
  5. Jul 17, 2007 #4


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    Girls are everywhere!

    Well what you described is basically common sense when it comes to interacting with people. Some guys really do have high standards, but the funny part is that those guys end up alone or with a girl that will make you question if he has any standards at all.

    Personally, I'm not really concerned for the males out there who don't know how to deal with women or interact with them or even get what they want. I just call them chumps or plugs. They really don't bother me much because it's not very difficult to get their girlfriends to break up with them.
  6. Jul 17, 2007 #5


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    Really? I find it easier!

    I'm not a fan of guys who think it takes a wallet. The fact that a man can think this already puts a big dent in their character, don't you think?
  7. Jul 17, 2007 #6
    so true... & women try to say they're not as superficial as men. :rolleyes: they're just superficial about different things!
  8. Jul 17, 2007 #7


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    I beg to defer, again.

    I can tell girls that my plans are to go to graduate school and live below poverty for the next 3-4 years and that doesn't affect the situation at all. Seriously, even the super hot ones that everyone thinks are superficial.

    So much bad perception going around, but like I said, it's my gain.

    Note: If I sound arrogant, I'm not. I'm just trying to change perception because I honestly think different. Maybe it's just that I have character or something. I have no idea.

    Oh, the one thing I noticed that girls absolutely love, even if they're dumb as a brick (but hot), is integrity. Even if they aren't aware of it, it's just a quality that sticks out because not many people have it. Or even the capacity of making them very comfortable.

    My ex-gf had issues with depression and anxiety. She took drugs every now and then for it. She told me that I was the only escape for her from anxiety and depression. That's how strong my presence and comfort was around her. So strong, that I never found out about the issue until like 18 months into the relationship and she had to tell me. I would never have guessed because like she said, it doesn't show around me at all. We still talk and I wouldn't be surprised that she still enjoys that feeling.

    My ex-gf before that also said something similiar. Could be in the worse mood, and I can just flip it around.

    Keep in mind, both break ups were not bad at all. Walked away on strong ground with no grudges and most likely continued admiration. Never got into a fight with a girl or anything. Break ups just happen because it's just the way it is kind of thing.

    A new female friend I made this year at school expressed the same feeling towards me. I only knew her like for a brief period and she just started spilling out a lot of stuff about her personal feelings and such. Things that she said that she never told anyone... not even her long time best friend. Her reason was that I handle everything with ease and an open mind for understanding, and the fact that I can bring comfort, just made her spill things out. One time I freaked out her though. That was funny. I cared for her too much not to.

    Or my psychology nut friend says my body language is just naturally positive and that's what he believe gets girls to have crushes on me even if I don't do anything at all. I can't complain. :smile:

    But as time goes by, I realize that some people have expressed a lot of feelings to me and shared a lot. From people on drugs telling me that I either motivated and somehow helped them quit, to a girl telling me her experience of getting raped.

    I found it strange before, but now that I understand more about myself and after actually asking people why, I'm really happy about the traits that I have.
    Last edited: Jul 17, 2007
  9. Jul 17, 2007 #8
    It also seems that my gender is obsessed with shape (thus the prevalence of eating disorders among women) and age (the woman has to be younger than the guy).
  10. Jul 17, 2007 #9
    No, obviously I don't think that. Because that's not what I wrote.

    I'm aware of the broad spectrum of people in our world. Some are superficial, some aren't. So speaking only from my experience, I've seen both sides of the shiny, dirty coin.

    "If you don't put out, I'll put you out."

    "If you ain't got the dime, I ain't got the time."
  11. Jul 17, 2007 #10
    sad but true. & in the media we're always told the women actually LIKE having sex believe it or not :bugeye: :eek: :surprised & some even complain that they don't get enough! if that's the case i must hang out in all the wrong places or these women just don't exist.
  12. Jul 17, 2007 #11
    Well, that's not what I meant, either. I was describing, I guess it could be called priorities. I have no doubt that they enjoy sex.
  13. Jul 17, 2007 #12


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    Girls absolute love it. Man, you don't even know. You must literally be looking in the wrong places. I rarely go a week without it.

    Where have you guys been?
  14. Jul 17, 2007 #13
    that i can understand. there are a lot of creeps & phonies around.
  15. Jul 17, 2007 #14


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    Then why focus on the bad part? The good part is way bigger, believe me.
  16. Jul 17, 2007 #15
    I'm sorry, I wasn't focusing on any thing. I was just trying to add balance to the topic, "Foolish male pride." My only point is that, when we put every man and woman on the same scale, it all balances out.
  17. Jul 17, 2007 #16


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    I don't think so. The more I meet people and discuss the new social aspects opening up because women are becoming more independent the more I see that the males are falling behind.

    I find that most males lack way more social skills than girls. There are so many girls out there that I can't even ponder of a reasonable excuse for a male not to be able to have a woman by his side. It's mind boggling.

    The people that guys call player's are sometimes just regular guys with good social skills. That's really what it is.
  18. Jul 17, 2007 #17
    That's a current trend I also recognize in my part of the world.

    But I'm describing the fundamental motives. As one society's standard of living improves, we see adjustments. Yet the attitudes will still linger for many people. So as one gender falls behind, they find a way to catch up. I expect that this is how it's always been.
  19. Jul 18, 2007 #18


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    How long are males willing to wait?

    I think in the new era where people can escape the need to deal with social interaction will make it much harder for males to ever catch up.

    This is why I never really have conversations on MSN or on the phone. Want to talk to me? We have to get together. Not possible, then conversation not possible. I will not date anyone that lives too far away for that very reason.
  20. Jul 18, 2007 #19
    Wow, is this topic rather biased. You'd expect now that women can't do anything wrong and that all males are *******s. Nice sweeping generalizations guys.
  21. Jul 18, 2007 #20
    http://www.isrealli.org/wp-content/uploads/oprah.JPG [Broken]
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