Collection of Lame Jokes

[jtbell]

 

[phinds]

News flash: Giant TEMU warehouse in Sichuan province china burned to the ground last night. In addition to the loss of the building and vehicles, which is substantial, the loss of merchandise is expected to go as high as $87.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

The inauguration is being moved inside due to the extremely cold weather expected.

That explains a lot. It WILL be a cold day in hell.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

 

[Borg]

It WILL be a cold day in hell.

I've been thinking that all week.

 

[fresh_42]

 

[Ivan Seeking]

 

[Ivan Seeking]

 

[Ivan Seeking]

View attachment 356060

That reminds me of me. One night a car alarm kept going off in the middle of the night. Finally I called 911 and asked if it was appropriate to report a car alarm. She paused for a second and then in an obvious manner said, Yeeeaaahhh. Only then did it dawn on me: They have become so common as a nuisance I forgot they are an actual alarm. She was confused by my question. LOL!

 

[edwardII]

 

[Orodruin]

 

[Ivan Seeking]

 

[fresh_42]

View attachment 356067

I know a better answer (a cartoon), but that would immediately be deleted with an infraction.

 

[Ibix]

View attachment 356067

To err is human.

To moo is bovine.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

I almost spit coffee all over my keyboard when I saw this.

 

[Swamp Thing]

View attachment 356067

This is Socrates, right? Reaching for the cup of hemlock?

Is he looking towards, and gesturing over his disciples' heads, at the guy who is overseeing the execution?

 

[Ivan Seeking]

This is Socrates, right? Reaching for the cup of hemlock?

Is he looking towards, and gesturing over his disciples' heads, at the guy who is overseeing the execution?

I don't think Socrates had access to the internet.

 

[phinds]

It's going to be so cold in DC tomorrow that politicians are going to be putting their hands in their own pockets.

 

[jtbell]

While leafing through one of my books today, I found on one page the following scribbled note:

"I have found the lamest joke to post to Physics Forums, but the margin of this page is too narrow to contain it."

 

[Orodruin]

 

[Ivan Seeking]

It's going to be so cold in DC tomorrow that politicians are going to be putting their hands in their own pockets.

I'm not going to tell the other 15 jokes that conjures up because I don't want to get banned.

 

[nsaspook]

 

[nsaspook]

 

[DaveC426913]

 

[nsaspook]

 

[Orodruin]

 

[fresh_42]

View attachment 356104

Never play drinking games with Russian men or British women!

 

[Ivan Seeking]

View attachment 356101

Works for me! The fire is a metaphor.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

View attachment 356104

Where is that girl that says daddy?

Oh yes, there she is. DEAL!

 

[jtbell]

I just saw a TV commercial for a new heartburn (gastrointestinal reflux) drug. It shows a cartoon superhero figure and the slogan "Voquezna can kick some acid."