Collection of Science Jokes P2

[BillTre]

 

[Demystifier]

http://www.relativelyinteresting.com/20-jokes-that-only-intellectuals-will-understand/

 

[fresh_42]

Just read somewhere:

I make bad science jokes, because all good ones Ar.

 

[mfb]

TO₂ OBScURe?

 

[fresh_42]

TO₂ OBScURe?

Sure or as our special customer service SURE!

 

[collinsmark]

[Source: https://www.smbc-comics.com/comic/get-me-a-scientist]

 

[Daz]

Homework Statement

It takes George 45 minutes to install a bollard in the street but it only takes Alex 30 minutes to do the same task. They work together as a team. If George and Alex install 7 bollards in 2 1/2 hours how are they going to get home?

Homework Equations

R = G-W
Where R is distance remaining,
G is the width of the gap, and
W is the width of the vehicle.

The Attempt at a Solution

I reckon they’ll be taking the bus.

 

[Hawksteinman]

So I just made this post on Facebook and thought it was too funny not to share :D

 

[mfb]

The post gets the spin assignments wrong. You need a rotation by 360 degrees divided by the spin. 720 degrees for spin 1/2 (USB in the joke), 360 for spin 1 (USB as it should be) and 180 for spin 2 (USB-c).

 

[DennisN]

For Sale. Baby Rudin. Never read.

I did not get this joke when I read it just now, so I googled and saw it was a math book.
And I found a very funny review of the book: Hilarious review of Baby Rudin on Amazon.

Finally, some people complain about the level of abstraction, which let me just say is not that high. If you want to see abstraction grab a copy of Spanier's 'Algebraic Topology' and stare at it for about an hour. Then open 'Baby Rudin' up again. I promise you the feeling you get when you sit in a hottub for like twenty minutes and then jump back in the pool. Invigorating.

 

[lekh2003]

This gem I found.

 

[lekh2003]

Science class in a nutshell.

 

[Demystifier]

 

[Demystifier]

 

[Demystifier]

 

[Demystifier]

 

[Demystifier]

 

[fresh_42]

I have once read, that Ludwig van Beethoven received a letter by his brother, signed: Johann van Beethoven, Landlord. It said, Beethoven signed his answer with, Ludwig van Beethoven, Brainlord.

 

[Demystifier]

View attachment 220599View attachment 220601

First, the author made an error about spins, the standard USB is spin-1/2, not spin-2.
Second, USB Type-C has solved this problem, it is spin-2: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/USB-C

 

[davenn]

 

[davenn]

hahahaha

 

[davenn]

always knew there was something fundamentally wrong with the world

 

[lekh2003]

View attachment 220956

He should no longer be in pressure. Just a little chip from his shoulder should fix it.

 

[mfb]

Everyone is the center of their own observable universe.

 

[Demystifier]

Everyone is the center of their own observable universe.

It sounds like some version of the Copenhagen interpretation of QM.

 

[fresh_42]

Everyone is the center of their own observable universe.

It sounds like some version of the Copenhagen interpretation of QM.

Messieurs, précision, s.v.p.! The joke says the center and as there is none, it remains true.
It might be a philosophical topic: with people, there is a significant difference between observable and observed universe. Normally, things don't exist for people until observed. So clearly a QM interpretation, but is it really Copenhagen? I think it's more Quantum Bayesianism.

 

[Demystifier]

 

[Demystifier]

 

[256bits]

I thought it was going to be:
Does your dog bite?
No.
Going to pet... Ouch!. He bit me.
I thought you said your dog doesn't bite.
Right. That's not my dog!

To make this a science joke...
Seek medical attention immediately!

 

[mfb]

The joke says the center and as there is none, it remains true.

There is the center of your observable universe, and this center is you. This has nothing to do with quantum mechanics.