Collection of Lame Jokes

[fresh_42]

 

[fresh_42]

 

[WWGD]

 

[phinds]

 

[phinds]

A parable to live by:
An old man, a boy and a donkey were going to town. The boy rode on the donkey, and the old man walked. As they went along they passed some people who remarked, "What a shame, the old man is walking, the boy is riding." The man and boy thought maybe the critics were right, so they changed positions.
Later they passed some people who remarked, "What a shame, he makes that little boy walk." So they decided they'd both walk.
Soon they passed some more people who remarked, "They're really stupid to walk when they have a decent donkey to ride."
So they both decided to ride the donkey. They passed some people who shamed them by saying, "How awful to put such a load on a poor donkey."
The boy and the man figured they were probably right, so they decide to carry the donkey. As they crossed the bridge, they lost their grip on the donkey; the donkey fell into the river and drowned.
The moral of the story: If you try to please everyone, you might as well kiss your ass goodbye.

 

[Ibix]

View attachment 330895

"He ain't heavy, he's my cover"?

 

[fresh_42]

 

[nsaspook]

When XML sucks less than something, you know it really sucks.

 

[Borg]

When XML sucks less than something, you know it really sucks.

WSDL comes to mind.

 

[fresh_42]

Do you also have an If-Then-There-Drawer?

 

[nsaspook]

 

[DennisN]

 

[DennisN]

 

[dextercioby]

 

[dextercioby]

 

[fresh_42]

 

[phinds]

 

[fresh_42]

View attachment 330957

I can confirm. ("Big Tasty TS with Bacon.")

 

[phinds]

 

[phinds]

 

[phinds]

 

[fresh_42]

 

[nuuskur]

That is...resourceful.

 

[gmax137]

and people wonder why life expectancy is lower for males...

 

[DaveC426913]

and people wonder why life expectancy is lower for males...

I have this theory that once the world was only full of XX. But some of the XX did stupid things like climb in trees and say "Lookit me! No hands!" and then fall out of the tree, breaking off a leg and becoming XY.

 

[nuuskur]

I have this theory that once the world was only full of XX. But some of the XX did stupid things like climb in trees and say "Lookit me! No hands!" and then fall out of the tree, breaking off a leg and becoming XY.

Apologies in advance for future plagiarism..

 

[fresh_42]

Finally, a statue that makes sense!​

 

[fresh_42]

 

[gmax137]

Finally, a statue that makes sense!​

View attachment 330971

How big is the crowd when it's not raining?

 

[fresh_42]

 

[Baluncore]

Just six degrees of separation.
And one degree of freedom for the bicycle.

 

[dextercioby]

 

[berkeman]

I hope I'm not related to this person.
View attachment 330987

Because they're short?

 

[fresh_42]

Because they're short?

No, because they didn't put the lock through the spokes.

 

[fresh_42]

 

[topsquark]

View attachment 330994

Happens to me all the time...

(Anybody want any candy? I've got lots in my van...)

-Dan

 

[Borg]

View attachment 330994

Someone sent me one of those once and did a reply all to the entire management staff. He was relegated to 'other' duties after that.

 

[dextercioby]

 

[dextercioby]

 

[fresh_42]

 

[fresh_42]

 

[nuuskur]

 

[fresh_42]

View attachment 331054

It's Sütterlin over here, Sütterlin!

 

[dextercioby]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[dextercioby]

One of the lamest jokes here. Those are pythobras.

 

[phinds]

This is why I don't like soft ice cream --- I know how it gets into the cup

 

[phinds]

View attachment 331054

Also, tell them they can drive back home in the car that's outside, but make it a stick shift.

 

[fresh_42]

I donated 4l blood today but I'll never do it again. They ask far too many questions. Whose blood is this? Where did you get it from? ...