Collection of Lame Jokes

[Delta Prime]

A priest, a Higgs boson and a faster than light neutrino go into a bar. The bartender asks “what you guys do for a living?” The Priest and the Higgs say "I give mass”; The faster than light neutrino says “That’s not my field”, and I will have a whiskey! Sit’s down, then walks into the bar.

 

[nsaspook]

https://www.ti.com/about-ti/newsroo...nnovation-in-the-tiniest-of-applications.html
TI introduces the world's smallest MCU, enabling innovation in the tiniest of applications


What can to do with the world smallest MCU?
Sneeze and watch it fly into the carpet.

 

[Orodruin]

Why I always thank ChatGPT for helping out …

 

[DaveC426913]

View attachment 359478

Why I always thank ChatGPT for helping out …

Man are you gonna flip when you hear about Roko's Basilisk...

 

[Orodruin]

Man are you gonna flip when you hear about Roko's Basilisk...

I did sign the permission forms for allowing the licensing of my book for the purposes of training data for machine learning ….

 

[davenn]

 

[nsaspook]

I do not pray often, but when I do, I pray to Zeus. No lines. No waiting. He is just glad to get the work.

 

[Ibix]

I do not pray often, but when I do, I pray to Zeus. No lines. No waiting. He is just glad to get the work.

You'll get hit by a thunderbolt if you don't Apollogise.

 

[jack action]

Not all construction work is equally enjoyable.

For example, enlarging a drilled hole is boring, but fastening pieces of metal together is riveting.

 

[nsaspook]

Q: Why did the poor dog chase his own tail?

A: He was trying to make ends meet!

 

[DaveC426913]

 

[Borg]

Which makes one wonder what wanker invented the WAnchor?

 

[dextercioby]

 

[dextercioby]

 

[nsaspook]

 

[DaveC426913]

Which makes one wonder what wanker invented the WAnchor?

This wanker I'm thinkin'.

View attachment 567b5ce11e148.webp

 

[davenn]

 

[Orodruin]

View attachment 359534

One of the best TV-series ever created.

 

[Bandersnatch]

One of the best TV-series ever created.

A comedy the like of which the world has never seen the like of which.

 

[nuuskur]

 

[WWGD]

A movie about Schrodinger was both made and not made. Should I use my time to go to the movie theater?

 

[WWGD]

A movie about Schrodinger was both made and not made. Should I use my time to go to the movie theater?

A movie about Heisenberg was made. But if they tell you the movie hall they can't tell you the time it plays.

 

[renormalize]

Walking across campus I thought I saw Heisenberg but I'm uncertain. I did see Schrodinger and he waved.

 

[jtbell]

Walking across campus I thought I saw Heisenberg but I'm uncertain. I did see Schrodinger and he waved.

Did you see Dirac?

 

[WWGD]

Did you see Dirac?

Haven't been to the afterlife in a while.

 

[renormalize]

Did you see Dirac?

Nope, but he might have been in a hole.

 

[WWGD]

Nope, but he might have been in a hole.

Rather than ' been an'.

 

[fresh_42]

Nope, but he might have been in a hole.

Did he lose his bra?

 

[WWGD]

Did he lose his bra?

He went back to tai ket>.

 

[WWGD]

Great to sit in the couch at the end of a long day. Sofa so good.

 

[berkeman]

He went back to tai ket.

You folks talk funny...

 

[jtbell]

Did you see Dirac?

Nope, but he might have been in a hole.

Did he lose his bra?

He went back to tai ket>.

He must be spinning (1/2?) in his grave.

 

[Delta Prime]

The only man to ever get all his work done by Friday, was Robinson Caruso…

 

[WWGD]

He must be spinning (1/2?) in his grave.

Somehow it reminds me of Bohemian Rhapsody.

 

[topsquark]

Somehow it reminds me of Bohemian Rhapsody.

So you are seeing the little silhoutto of a man?

-Dan

 

[WWGD]

So you are seeing the little silhoutto of a man?

-Dan

Indeed, Scaramouche.

 

[jack action]

I asked Google what my purpose is, and it showed me 3 ads and a cookie policy.

 

[DaveC426913]

I asked Google what my purpose is, and it showed me 3 ads and a cookie policy.

Well, when I asked, it said your purpose is "...to mechanically amplify the movement of a piano key into a faster, longer hammer movement, allowing the hammer to strike the strings and produce sound, and then retracting the hammer and lifting the damper."

 

[nsaspook]

 

[nsaspook]

I asked Google what my purpose is, and it showed me 3 ads and a cookie policy.

.

 

[jtbell]

The only man to ever get all his work done by Friday, was Robinson Caruso…

I always heard the Gilligan's Island theme song as "Like Robinson Caruso, it's primitive as can be..."

 

[jack action]

 

[DaveC426913]

View attachment 359607​

German seems intimidating because of these giant words. I think we generally assume there is a huge collection of very specific words about very specific things.

It becomes a lot less intimidating when one discovers that they're not inventing new words for every little thing, all they're doing is eliminating spaces from descriptive phrases.

"Alice grabbed the bigredbouncyball."

 

[fresh_42]

German seems intimidating because of these giant words. I think we generally assume there is a huge collection of very specific words about very specific things.

It becomes a lot less intimidating when one discovers that they're not inventing new words for every little thing, all they're doing is eliminating spaces from descriptive phrases.

"Alice grabbed the bigredbouncyball."

Yes, we thought about the construction of foot ball to the end. And factually nobody says Hilfeleistungslöschgruppenfahrzeug. It is a Feuerwehrauto (firefightercar) so we only dropped a blank as you do in football or electromagnetism.

 

[fresh_42]

 

[jack action]

we only dropped a blank as you do in football

No blank dropped: IT'S SOCCER!

 

[fresh_42]

No blank dropped: IT'S SOCCER!

And how do you call your handegg?

 

[fresh_42]

 

[Ibix]

Good thing it wasn't held in with duct tape!

 

[Swamp Thing]

Good thing it wasn't held in with duct tape!

Or cyanoacrylate and baking soda? Or cyano + ramen noodles?