Collection of Lame Jokes

[WWGD]

For that occasional dark joke: A recording of James Holmes, the Colorado movie theater shooter, was found: " I said NO BUTTER in my popcorn".

 

[DaveC426913]

 

[symbolipoint]

As if you could still distinguish A,B,C,D, ... given the 800!

The important clue is how first character and last character resemble each other. Might not work if less than eight floors in the building.

 

[sbrothy]

EDIT4: I don't think the name-link works in the quotes so, I'm pulling it out so @symbolipoint gets a notice:

"I deleted this because what I wrote looked like I thought @symbolipoint was some kind of slow person. I have no idea what I was thinking and I profusely apologize."

-------------------------------------------



What a nice place this is. Several people helping instantly!

EDIT: ok that didn’t make much sense. I misread senders

EDIT2: and I’m talking about something Else entirely. Sorry !!!

EDIT3: I really wish I was drunk or on drugs. That would help explain my scatterbrain-Ness. Alas.

 

[DaveC426913]

What a nice place this is. Several people helping instantly!

EDIT: ok that didn’t make much sense. I misread senders

EDIT2: and I’m talking about something Else entirely. Sorry !!!

EDIT3: I really wish I was drunk or on drugs. That would help explain my scatterbrain-Ness. Alas.

Hey! Less chatting! More story-reading!

 

[sbrothy]

Hah yeah! Problem is I’m on my way from one “client” to the other!

On the bus. With my bicycle no less!

 

[sbrothy]

But yeah, seriously. I finally have a couple of hours for myself now. I'll make a cuppa tea, put some relaxing music on and see if I can't get going....

 

[jack action]

That is downright dangerous! I think you’d be stopped pretty quickly in Denmark. Probably Photoshop tho.

I suspect a good chunk of those jokes are made using Adobe. Like some of those church ones.

In the US, there is no need for photoshop:

​

 

[WWGD]

In the US, there is no need for photoshop:

​

Is that Fred G. Sanford's? :)?

 

[davenn]

 

[davenn]

 

[davenn]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[fresh_42]

 

[berkeman]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[symbolipoint]

EDIT4: I don't think the name-link works in the quotes so, I'm pulling it out so @symbolipoint gets a notice:

"I deleted this because what I wrote looked like I thought @symbolipoint was some kind of slow person. I have no idea what I was thinking and I profusely apologize."

-------------------------------------------



What a nice place this is. Several people helping instantly!

EDIT: ok that didn’t make much sense. I misread senders

EDIT2: and I’m talking about something Else entirely. Sorry !!!

EDIT3: I really wish I was drunk or on drugs. That would help explain my scatterbrain-Ness. Alas.

You did send something privately. I did not know what it was a response to, so I made no response to it. Maybe, try again?

 

[BillTre]

My Dad liked to tell me about Burma Shave signs.

 

[sbrothy]

You did send something privately. I did not know what it was a response to, so I made no response to it. Maybe, try again?

It was basically just an apology for the post I made here. Now I deleted it it no longer makes any sense. Please just ignore it.

EDIT: And thanks for being a sport about it. I was really scatterbrained there for a minute. Not even intoxicated, just confused.

 

[DaveC426913]

My Dad liked to tell me about Burma Shave signs.

View attachment 365320

Back in about 1980, my science teacher gave a bonus question on a quiz. The solution was:

Space is big
Space is dark
It's hard to find
A place to park.

We all looked at him blankly, and he said "You know? Burma Shave?" We continued to look at him blankly.
That'e my entire experience with Burma Shave signs. But I've never forgotten it.

 

[sbrothy]

Back in about 1980, my science teacher gave a bonus question on a quiz. The solution was:

Space is big
Space is dark
It's hard to find
A place to park.

We all looked at him blankly, and he said "You know? Burma Shave?" We continued to look at him blankly.
That'e my entire experience with Burma Shave signs. But I've never forgotten it.

I’ve read about that but forgotten it.

 

[WWGD]

I’ve read about that but forgotten it.

The common absurd follow up question: Forgotten what?

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[sbrothy]

The common absurd follow up question: Forgotten what?

The thing about the Burma shave ads. There was something funny or tropey hidden there. I can find it but I lazily expected you to do it for me.

 

[sbrothy]

The thing about the Burma shave ads. There was something funny or tropey hidden there. I can find it but I lazily expected you to do it for me.

https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Advertising/BurmaShave


EDIT: this is what I meant.

 

[WWGD]

The thing about the Burma shave ads. There was something funny or tropey hidden there. I can find it but I lazily expected you to do it for me.

Don't even remember the ad, sorry.

 

[sbrothy]

Don't even remember the ad, sorry.

Well we’re talking the roaring twenties so I guess that’s no so strange.

 

[sbrothy]

sbrothy and his antics
are a little depraved.
But there’s a quick fix:
A Burma-Shave.



EDIT: man that was bad. Sorry.

 

[sbrothy]

View attachment 365331

Perhaps a little tasteless. Then again who am I to speak? Dark humor indeed!

 

[Ivan Seeking]

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Perhaps a little tasteless. Then again who am I to speak? Dark humor indeed!

This is so dark that at first I laughed, and then I felt guilty for laughing. So I quickly saved it.

It seems you have to click on the upper right corner for the pop out. It takes about six seconds to start once you hit play

 

[sbrothy]

This is so dark that at first I laughed, and then I felt guilty for laughing. So I quickly saved it.

It seems you have to click on the upper right corner for the pop out. It takes about six seconds to start once you hit play

Doesn't start at all here. But that's OK. It will eventually and I can wait feeling guilty!

 

[sbrothy]

Doesn't start at all here. But that's OK. It will eventually and I can wait feeling guilty!

OK there it came! Chigago's own indeed! Ouch. :P

 

[phinds]

Space is big
Space is dark
It's hard to find
A place to park.

my all time favorite from the height of the space race.

before you race
for outer space,
take a look
at your face

BURMA SHAVE !

 

[phinds]

Don't even remember the ad, sorry.

Oh, you youngsters !

 

[Ivan Seeking]

OK there it came! Chigago's own indeed! Ouch. :P

Regarding her joke, she does look like she could be....

 

[nsaspook]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[berkeman]

 

[Ivan Seeking]

 

[BillTre]

There is a funny movie with that name:

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0427944/
smoking,alcohol, and guns

 

[symbolipoint]

That double-sided cigarette-ligher message, I really do not "like " it. I just think it is very interesting and humorous in an unfortunate way.

 

[phinds]

 

[WWGD]

Catwoman stars in Batman movies. What does Catman do?

 

[Ibix]

Catwoman stars in Batman movies. What does Catman do?

He's a minor Batman villain: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Catman_(DC_Comics)

 

[WWGD]

He's a minor Batman villain: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Catman_(DC_Comics)

He ruins my joke by virtue of being an actual character.