Collection of Lame Jokes

[hmmm27]

One more:

Déjà Groundhog All Over Again

Deja vole.

 

[Swamp Thing]

No Country for Ground Hogs.

 

[phinds]

 

[DaveC426913]

 

[jack action]

 

[jack action]

 

[jack action]

 

[dextercioby]

 

[256bits]

View attachment 327176

And what should he have said to not get him into trouble.
" You look so much slimmer and younger back then"
" You were so much beautiful back then"
...

"

 

[davenn]

 

[256bits]

What's the one about the snake that can't multiply?

Cuz it's an adder.

 

[jack action]

Why isn't there any mouse-flavored cat food?

 

[jack action]

 

[jack action]

 

[256bits]

She came out of the company meeting agitated and flustered.
After all the sensitivity training and all that, he still had the audacity to tell her " to quit acting like a flamingo!"

I told her "That's really bad. Put your foot down"

 

[Ibix]

What's the one about the snake that can't multiply?

Cuz it's an adder.

See earlier in this thread.

 

[dextercioby]

 

[julian]

Being keen in Esperanto I enquired into the opportunity to participate in an exchange program with someone from Esperantoland, because I thought it would an enriching experience.

 

[julian]

 

[DrGreg]

View attachment 327260

Massachusetts: American for "lots of teeth".

Spoiler: I don't get it

Mass of chew sets

 

[phinds]

An elderly, but hardy cattleman from Texas once told a young friend Sally that if she wanted to live a long life, the secret was to sprinkle a pinch of gunpowder on her oatmeal each morning. Sally did this religiously and lived to the ripe old age of 103. She left behind 14 children, 30 grandchildren, 21 great-grandchildren, five great-great-grandchildren and a 40 foot hole where the crematorium used to be.

 

[WWGD]

You aint nothing but a Groundhog.

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[256bits]

View attachment 327267

Yes, yes, heard it before, farmers are outstanding in their field.

 

[256bits]

Why isn't there any mouse-flavored cat food?

tastes like chicken.

 

[topsquark]

tastes like chicken.

They asked me how I knew
That raccoon poop was blue
So, like a fool I said
Raccoon poop is red!

I've always wondered how dog and cat food creators know just how "beefy" their products taste.

-Dan

 

[Mayhem]

My thesis

 

[Arjan82]

I've always wondered how dog and cat food creators know just how "beefy" their products taste.

-Dan

You know, it's actually a job...:
https://recipes.howstuffworks.com/food-facts/food-careers/food-taster3.htm

 

[Arjan82]

View attachment 327260

For me as non-native English speaker these are always a bit hard. So:

Spoiler: I don't get it

apparent teeth

correct?