What do 'nerdy' guys like in girls?

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The discussion centers around the qualities that 'nerdy' boys find attractive in girls, with participants sharing their experiences and preferences. Many express that intelligence, a sense of humor, and kindness are key traits they admire. There's a consensus that nerdy guys often appreciate directness and are more likely to respond positively when approached by girls. Some participants mention that physical appearance becomes less important compared to personality traits as intelligence increases. A recurring theme is the desire for mutual interests, with some emphasizing the importance of ambition and open-mindedness. The conversation also touches on the challenges nerdy boys face in dating due to shyness and social skills, with advice suggesting that girls should show interest and engage in conversations about shared interests. Overall, the thread highlights a blend of humor and earnestness in exploring what nerdy boys seek in potential partners.
  • #551
MotoH said:
When she kills you in your sleep for not taking the dishes out of the dishwasher, you will wish you put emotional stability at the top of the list.

:smile:

It's funny and it's true.

I had a crazy once. I only thank my lucky stars that, when she succumbed to her rage, it was her own head over which she smashed a clay flowerpot, and not mine...
 
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  • #552
MotoH said:
When she kills you in your sleep for not taking the dishes out of the dishwasher, you will wish you put emotional stability at the top of the list.
I sleep with my eyes open. I could recommend it to anyone, the quaestion's not if you're too paranoid, rather if you aren't paranoid enough.

Also, when she kills you at all you put personality on top, and when you die because of her incompetence to realize the hazards of electricity you put intelligence on top, your point being?
 
  • #553
MotoH said:
When she kills you in your sleep for not taking the dishes out of the dishwasher, you will wish you put emotional stability at the top of the list.

If you keep making me laugh out loud, I shall be forced to vote for you in PF's Best Humor Award for 2010. Consider yourself warned.
 
  • #554
DaveC426913 said:
:smile:

It's funny and it's true.

I had a crazy once. I only thank my lucky stars that, when she succumbed to her rage, it was her own head over which she smashed a clay flowerpot, and not mine...

I've yet to get to know a woman and find that she isn't at least a little bit crazy. If it's not an overwhelming and completely irrational fear of something then they must be a habitual liar, banging their head on a wall after sex , wishing that they could be a vampire, pretending to have multiple personality disorder, or who knows what.
 
  • #555
Aggression is a different thing than emotional instability though.

I like people to be not that praedictable, if people are it becomes boring. Ironically, I'm probably the single most praedictable person on the planet, I basically have next to no different moods, I still listen to every music I ever listened to, never acquired or lost a taste, at every different moment I like the same things, reply the same thing to the same quaestion, I'm like a functional programming language. And I find these kind of people extremely boring, I like surprises.
 
  • #556
i seem to be attracted to crazy, and it tends not to work out well in the end, as it becomes contagious. I've got to seriously consider choosing the bottom two points on the relationship triangle.
 
  • #557
Proton Soup said:
i seem to be attracted to crazy, and it tends not to work out well in the end, as it becomes contagious. I've got to seriously consider choosing the bottom two points on the relationship triangle.
That's a flaw of mine as well. Knowing where it stems from makes it just that little bit more annoying.
 
  • #558
Proton Soup said:
i seem to be attracted to crazy, and it tends not to work out well in the end, as it becomes contagious. I've got to seriously consider choosing the bottom two points on the relationship triangle.

Uh, we're not talkin' "zany" dancing barefoot in the fountain crazy. We're talkin' prescription antidepressant 4AM sojourns in 2 feet of snow through suburbs chasing a hysterical person who's in nothing but pyjamas the night before your big exam crazy.
 
  • #559
DaveC426913 said:
Uh, we're not talkin' "zany" dancing barefoot in the fountain crazy. We're talkin' prescription antidepressant 4AM sojourns in 2 feet of snow through suburbs chasing a hysterical person who's in nothing but pyjamas the night before your big exam crazy.

Whoa. That sounds like the voice of experience talking.

Although this really makes me want to tell the story about a guy I was dating when I was 18. I was living on my own by then. He was more than a little nuts. There was the time he stranded me in Fitzroy Provincial Park in the middle of the night and I had to walk to the ranger station so I could call my sister to come and get me. We were supposed to be camping, I went for a walk, came back to the campsite, and the tent, supplies, car, everything was gone. He decided that he'd "lost" me, and packed up and drove back to the city. I wasn't gone that long. The park rangers laughed at me. My sister yelled at me all the way back to the city when she came and picked me up.

Then there was the time that I was at a friend's place in the far, far east end, out in suburbia (I lived in Ottawa then) after his sister and I had signed said fellow to the local psychiatric hospital earlier that afternoon. He signed himself out that evening, made his way to my sister's place, and sat on the grass on my sister's front lawn, howling my name to the moon. My sister, genius that she was, phoned me and told me that I'd better come to her place (I didn't have a car and she lived on the Quebec side of Ottawa) and get him off of her lawn. I told her to phone the police.

But, so yeah. Attracting crazy. Jeez I can tell stories. If nothing else, guys, don't worry, it's not just you. There seems to be an over abundance of flipped out males on the planet too.
 
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  • #560
GeorginaS said:
But, so yeah. Attracting crazy. Jeez I can tell stories. If nothing else, guys, don't worry, it's not just you. There seems to be an over abundance of flipped out males on the planet too.

I'm your hell, I'm your dream, I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way
 
  • #561
DanP said:
I'm your hell, I'm your dream, I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way

You didn't just quote Alanis Morissette did you?
 
  • #562

you hate her ?
 
  • #563
DanP said:
you hate her ?

You could say that. I mean, come on, she wrote a song about a word she didn't even know the definition of!
 
  • #564
cristo said:
You could say that. I mean, come on, she wrote a song about a word she didn't even know the definition of!

Hahaha !:wink:
 
  • #565
cristo said:
You didn't just quote Alanis Morissette did you?

I'm pretty sure that's a Meredith Brook quote anyway :-p
 
  • #566
cristo said:
You didn't just quote Alanis Morissette did you?

I was going to say it was Meredith Brooks but when I checked to make sure I had the name right it turns out Morissette did a cover of it. Odd.
 
  • #567
whybother said:
I'm pretty sure that's a Meredith Brook quote anyway :-p

Oh yeah, you're right. Well, they're pretty much the same person anyway...
 
  • #568
cristo said:
You could say that. I mean, come on, she wrote a song about a word she didn't even know the definition of!

:smile:

And then she wrote another song about how successful that one was!

'cuz I've got one hand in your pocket
And the other one is writin' out a deposit slip...
 
  • #569
DaveC426913 said:
Uh, we're not talkin' "zany" dancing barefoot in the fountain crazy. We're talkin' prescription antidepressant 4AM sojourns in 2 feet of snow through suburbs chasing a hysterical person who's in nothing but pyjamas the night before your big exam crazy.

so far, I've done "needs to be on anti-anxiety meds and we can't even stop in the middle of the day to get a bite to eat in New Orleans 15 years before Katrina" crazy, and "childhood sexual abuse leads to multiple personalities that come out at weird times, couldn't stay in college and married the first guy that would get me away from my parents" crazy. i feel like I've got a decent grasp of the subject.
 
  • #570
You have done nothing, when a girl you love suddenly terminates contact with you for two weeks because she thinks you're a spy from her father who then calls you again crying afterwards, then you know you've hit on the pot of gold of paranoid insanity.

But cute, yeah, it's cute.
 
  • #571
Well, were you a spy?
 
  • #572
Not really, never spoke to the guy, apparently they had some difficult business with court cases with him.

The strange part was that they were all friends except for that court cases and she spoke him every day on the phone.
 
  • #573
Kajahtava said:
You have done nothing, when a girl you love suddenly terminates contact with you for two weeks because she thinks you're a spy from her father who then calls you again crying afterwards, then you know you've hit on the pot of gold of paranoid insanity.

But cute, yeah, it's cute.

heh, this just sounds like the monthly kind of crazy to me.
 
  • #574
Proton Soup said:
heh, this just sounds like the monthly kind of crazy to me.
Oh, she didn't have a period yet back then.
 
  • #575
what?
 
  • #576
I was kidding, before I get this guy knocking on my door.

ChrisHansen.jpg


By the way, to play the Devil's advocate, there is very little evidence that suggests that humans are the only mammals on the planet where individuals whose reproductive organs become operation and whose hormones start triggering an interest in sex are some how not 'ready for it', what-ever that means. Historically evidence also undeniably shows that it's not a universal cultural acceptance by far.

Or as they say, old enough to bleed, old enough to breed. But I thought 'Old enough to talk, old enough to ****.' was an interesting dogma too.
 
  • #577
MissSilvy said:
...
what qualities do 'nerdy' boys like in girls?
...

Sorry, I believe only cool guys around here (physics forums) so I think it will be hard to you find the answer...=)

Anyway, I personally have number of different "profiles" I find attractive.
(Different sets of traits...)

In general, girls like infinite series can be sorted into 3 groups:
If they absolutely convergent they are boring...
If they divergent they are scary...
Rest cases can be very interesting, and subject to further research...

*Mandatory properties =):
1.Polite/politesse.
2.Gentle.
 
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  • #578
MissSilvy said:
Let's turn the tables for a second: what qualities do 'nerdy' boys like in girls?

I love 'nerdy' boys and I'm very lucky that my school is quite science and tech focused. However, a lot of them are incredibly cute and endearing but very shy and give off mixed signals. With other guys, it's fairly straight forward but I know quite a few self-professed 'dorks' that I would go out to dinner with if only they'd ask.

There have been numerous threads on what girls like in guys, but now I'm asking the opposite question; what do smart guys like yourselves like in girls? If possible, I'd be interested in opinions on or from college-aged guys. Thanks!

('Sex' is not an answer. Nice try, PF but I'm looking for more subtle points :))

MissSilvy said:
Current junior in physics at a pretty well ranked university, but our physics department has an 11 to 1 ratio of men to women. I don't feel academically intimidated or opressed or anything but I HATE that I can't ever get along casually with my fellow students. The two girls I see sometimes and myself get along fine, but every single time I try to put together a study group or just hang out in the physics lounge with a few guys, it always turns into this awkward unreciprocated attraction. Literally, without exception so far. Which leads to poor nerdy guys working up to courage to awkwardly ask me out to get a coffee sometime and me gently saying no, but by then the friendship is shot.

This is in no way to be constructed as "Haha, I'm so good looking that everyone wants me!" because just having a pair of breasts seems to do the trick, but come on now. This situation is getting ridiculous. I don't want to date, I don't have time to date, and I am not attracted to any of them. I want a few people I can hang out with, talk about physics, and possibly moan about classes. It's going to be a lonely two years if this keeps up and I'm not looking forward to that :( Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

https://www.physicsforums.com/showthread.php?p=2748163#post2748163

Talk about cognitive dissonance.
 
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  • #579
zoobyshoe said:
Talk about cognitive dissonance.
What's wrong with c.d.? :smile: Even more to the point, what's wrong with temporal dissonance?
 
  • #580
EnumaElish said:
What's wrong with c.d.? :smile: Even more to the point, what's wrong with temporal dissonance?
Yes. What's wrong with chaotic flips? A real strange attractor if you ask me.
 
  • #581
zoobyshoe said:
Yes. What's wrong with chaotic flips? A real strange attractor if you ask me.
We all go through phases...
 
  • #582
EnumaElish said:
We all go through phases...
I found high school to be the most hilarious. I spent that time watching the drama everyone else was having. People went through some very intersting phases there.
 
  • #583
zoobyshoe said:
Talk about cognitive dissonance.

:smile:

My thoughts exactly.
 
  • #584
zoobyshoe said:
https://www.physicsforums.com/newreply.php?do=newreply&p=2748163

Talk about cognitive dissonance.
No, it is perfectly logical, this thread is over a year old. Back then she wanted to attract the nerds, she got some tips and then she become a nerd magnet! Then she got bored of nerds so now she is asking how to make them stop.

Or she could just be moody.
 
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  • #585
zoobyshoe said:
Yes. What's wrong with chaotic flips? A real strange attractor if you ask me.

perhaps you are not familiar with the female species. these things tend to correlate with the tides.
 
  • #586
Klockan3 said:
No, it is perfectly logical, this thread is over a year old. Back then she wanted to attract the nerds, she got some tips and then she become a nerd magnet! Then she got bored of nerds so now she is asking how to make them stop.

Or she could just be moody.

Ah, she learned the lessons from this thread too well. A little like the sorcerer's apprentice.
 
  • #587
BobG said:
Ah, she learned the lessons from this thread too well. A little like the sorcerer's apprentice.

Christ, I'll say. A cautionary tale about getting what you ask for indeed.
 
  • #588
MissSilvy said:
Christ, I'll say. A cautionary tale about getting what you ask for indeed.

Oh puhlease. Years from now you'll look back with regret on your college years wondering what if..

We will still be here of course, pragmatic and epicurean. You, on the other hand, might miss out on something great.
 
  • #589
True but I know I won't miss the smell :P
 
  • #590
This should sum it up
 
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  • #591
MissSilvy said:
True but I know I won't miss the smell :P
Nerd sweat?
 
  • #592
MissSilvy said:
Let's turn the tables for a second: what qualities do 'nerdy' boys like in girls?

Now that I've read your other thread...apparently they just like that you're female. :smile: (Sorry, couldn't help myself.)
 
  • #593
MissSilvy said:
Let's turn the tables for a second: what qualities do 'nerdy' boys like in girls?

That's a fairly subjective question. I've observed for the most part that they tend to like girls who are into sciences or mathematics. It implies similar interests. Personally I can't stand 'girly' girls. If I had to come up with an ideal sort of woman, it would be someone who wasn't obsessive over their appearance the way most women are, tough, etc. A girl without the sass so to speak.
 
  • #594
In descending order of visual importance: slim, cute, tall
In descending order of manner: intelligent, reserved
All of the above are necessary, but to varying degrees.
What a surprisingly simple list...
 
  • #595
It's interesting that the 'what do girls like in guys?' threads rarely get past two pages, but this one just doesn't seem to want to die. Maybe no one's every asked men what they like, or am I completely off the mark?
 
  • #596
Men like women. Occasionally men will like girls over 18, and then become disillusioned as to the outcome of that attraction, and find a need to break stuff, grow a beard, and just disappear for a few months into the Amazon jungle. But mostly men are a dominant species who enjoy the chase, and enjoy the spoils of war. They don't stop to wonder if that is zen with their feelings, they know it is. They don't stop to wonder if it is wrong to feel pleasure in kissing a woman, caressing her, and becoming more intimate and having sex with her. They simply know they enjoy it and that is who men are. Men enjoy women, kissing women, caressing women, and having sex with said women.

What men don't enjoy is seeing a woman cry, whining, being played, being lied to, being cheated on (which is a form of lying), being used, and being made a fool out of. Anything that negatively affects men's pride and therefore their dominance, is a sign of disrespect. Its not only direspect, but it is something another man would do, and when a woman does it she evokes a natural response (anger) against her if she tries to emasculate the man. Anger leads to hatred, hatred leads to anger with a d, danger. Danger leads to a man getting back his cojones, and if its illegal then going to prison and having to live through the process again.
 
  • #597
cronxeh said:
Anger leads to hatred, hatred leads to anger with a d, danger. Danger leads to a man getting back his cojones, and if its illegal then going to prison and having to live through the process again.

I think this part belongs in the "What do psychopathic guys like in girls?" thread.


Just a weeeeee bit scary, guy.
 
  • #598
BobG said:
I think this part belongs in the "What do psychopathic guys like in girls?" thread.


Just a weeeeee bit scary, guy.

:smile:

You always get scared in the presence of testosterone? :biggrin:
 
  • #599
Intelligence, honesty (not only in the "don't lie" sense, but in the social interaction sense), relaxation (i.e. not taking everything too seriously), flexibility (the world isn't set in stone), and self-distance.

Those are the most obvious things I can think of. As for visual appearance that's more of a bonus than anything else, but I'd rather not date someone who's obese, for a large number of reasons, not all of them shallow.
 
  • #600
MissSilvy said:
It's interesting that the 'what do girls like in guys?' threads rarely get past two pages, but this one just doesn't seem to want to die. Maybe no one's every asked men what they like, or am I completely off the mark?
Because there are mostly males on this forum so they can discuss among each other about the issue while the other topic haven't reached the critical mass of posters to get a constant discussion going.
 

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