sexual disorientation
It was a tremendous afternoon with perfect weather. My favorite lesbian couple took me to a trendy bar and restaurant and introduced me to coconut margaritas, which we sipped on the patio. I really should spend more time with those two. I don't think I laugh harder with anyone than I do with them.
A friend of theirs who had recently changed gender was coming to visit and we got on the topic of how to relate to people in your life who have made this transition. (They actually find it just about as awkward as I do. That was kind of a relief, because I've judged a lot of the discomfort I feel as coming from of being an uptight straight person.)
Now, my friend M has a wonderful way of saying something unintentionally funny after she's had a few cocktails. Her partner and I always seize the opportunity to capitalize on it, and make it a running theme through the rest of the libations.
Speaking of the recently transgendered friend, M said,
"Well, she's a woman now, but before that he was a man. Before that, he was an accountant."
Who knew that accountant was a completely separate gender/sexual orientation? We were off and running.
M.'s partner mentioned that her old roommate had recently come out of the closet as an accountant, but she had always suspected as much, seeing ledgers left indiscreetly around the apartment. I cautioned that we ought to keep our voices down, as this was known to be an accounting part of town, and we might actually be in an accountant bar. I pondered whether terms like "bean counter" and "number cruncher" might be offensive slurs. As the coconut 'ritas flowed on, I even admitted that when I was younger, I had secretly suspected that I might be an accountant.
M was a really good sport about it, only occasionally flipping us the bird.
A friend of theirs who had recently changed gender was coming to visit and we got on the topic of how to relate to people in your life who have made this transition. (They actually find it just about as awkward as I do. That was kind of a relief, because I've judged a lot of the discomfort I feel as coming from of being an uptight straight person.)
Now, my friend M has a wonderful way of saying something unintentionally funny after she's had a few cocktails. Her partner and I always seize the opportunity to capitalize on it, and make it a running theme through the rest of the libations.
Speaking of the recently transgendered friend, M said,
"Well, she's a woman now, but before that he was a man. Before that, he was an accountant."
Who knew that accountant was a completely separate gender/sexual orientation? We were off and running.
M.'s partner mentioned that her old roommate had recently come out of the closet as an accountant, but she had always suspected as much, seeing ledgers left indiscreetly around the apartment. I cautioned that we ought to keep our voices down, as this was known to be an accounting part of town, and we might actually be in an accountant bar. I pondered whether terms like "bean counter" and "number cruncher" might be offensive slurs. As the coconut 'ritas flowed on, I even admitted that when I was younger, I had secretly suspected that I might be an accountant.
M was a really good sport about it, only occasionally flipping us the bird.
Total Comments 4
Comments
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God hates accountants.
Posted Jul25-10 at 04:29 PM by cronxeh 
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It's only a matter of time before the Westboro Baptist Church starts picketing Price Waterhouse.Posted Jul25-10 at 05:17 PM by Math Is Hard
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I had a friend once who was an accountant. I'd take my taxes to him every year, but there was this one year when he seemed to have grown enormous pectoral muscles. He looked like Arnold Schwartzenegger before politics. I said, "Have you been excersizing recently? You look great!"
He responded, "No. See, accountants don't appeal to women any more than they appeal to engineers, and it gets kinda lonely at night, so I had these breast implants put in so I have someone to hold while I fall asleep."
You women are lucky to have the girls so close at heart!Posted Aug14-10 at 09:46 AM by Q_Goest
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I wonder if he found a way to write those off on his taxes.
The best thing about cleavage is always having an extra pocket. I never worry about having a place to temporarily stash my iPod, keys, money, spatula, occasional squirrel, etc.Posted Aug14-10 at 01:19 PM by Math Is Hard
